This article is for all my friends, enemies, acquaintances, or strange wonderful people who, for some strange reason, find me to be the embodiment of the positive thinking person.
It has happened many times when I’ve published something that is quite objective, revealing different sides, shades, and below I’d receive comments like, “You are a very positive person, only if I could be as positive as you are.”
This honestly throws me in perplexity. The duality of our world, the duality of the “positive” thoughts, the “bad” thoughts, and the work with them are not really understood by most people, and when you talk to them, they are looking embarrassed saying, “Hmm, let’s choose the positive side of things, but let’s not think positively because it’s misleading. Yet isn’t that hypocrisy?”
Positive thinking might be a dangerous area to be in.
Firstly, because it focuses on “thinking,” which is often a function of an ego, which always looks for what to analyze, compare, label, break, and draw in well-known places.
Positive thinking shows off with all of its intellectual achievements and well-stocked facts that are always ready to serve when it comes to another portion of thinking.
This eternally buzzing mind, carefully analyzing the situation, the participants, the benefits, the damages, the bad ones, the good ones, move people very precisely in each of the extremes of the cradle, generating more and more guesses, assumptions, analyses, comparisons, conclusions, and emotions.
And secondly, because positive thinking is respectively understood by the mass audience as, “Whatever happens to you, turn it off, ignore it, rename it, place another label on it, and then – everything will be great. The world is roses and butterflies, put your pink glasses on and confirm that the world is beautiful, the world is wonderful, what fell on my head is not a brick, it is a bouquet of roses and now I have a wreath.”
All of this, of course, is a very elementary and profane description of the “positive thinking” phenomenon. But that is how it is perceived, understood and brought into action by the masses.
Who are the masses?
In different parts of the world the masses are different. There are countries where people have been skillfully manipulated for centuries. There are certain authors and lecturers who make a show. A seminar on “positive thinking” is more of a show and a masquerade, a game of idols, masterfully directed phrases, pronounced in a thunderous and fateful tone, but otherwise hollows.
Most people who have attended seminars organized by important “positive” people know what this is about. This is an interesting phenomenon, yet very lush on the territory of other countries.
The understanding in other countries is different. The “material” of positive thinking is damaged; it’s not subject to a mass manipulation. Not with such simple tools as “positive” thinking.
In other countries, there’s the model of a “ victim,” which has been affirmed. Accordingly, there’s also an aggressor. People play this model so skillfully that they become victims.
And suddenly after years of violence, religious wars, different political ideologies, aggression, oppression, martyrdom, sacrifices, pain, suffering, poverty, manipulations, grimaces, and heavy hearts, John Doe (factitious name) comes and says, “Think positively. Everything is roses, smiles, violets, butterflies, luminous sky and the more you grin at the dark, black world, the more your life will become better.”
Wait a minute? Is life bad in the first place? Or is it good? There is confusion here. The cradle is swinging again. It’s at the other extreme.
And who is inclined to label and search for definitions? Perhaps, that’s the ego. The ego that keeps people away from their intuition, from their knowledge, from memories springing from the Universal library?
Yet, at the same time, if you’re smiling, you see the beauty around you, you find appreciation in it and you’re grateful for it – somehow it’s really easy, it’s unreasonably wonderful, and things begin to fall into place by themselves, you begin to attract people with whom you share experiences, thoughts, and so much more with pleasure.
Thus, there must be a key hidden somewhere.
Often, I tell people, the duality of our world (as an example of positive and negative thinking, good and evil) is an original concept, a learning tool that has been for centuries dominating our planet.
And not just for anything, but to force us, to push us to know the extremes, the contrasts and to find the appropriateness in each of them.
In the end, it’s really simple, it leads people to finding themselves. And when you go through the whole circle of extremes when you become familiar with them and experience everything, when you take it all in you have nothing else but to find your center. And remove yourself from the circle, finding the center (without the actual center) in the eternal sphere of life.
Then the ego-mind ceases to think. No, this doesn’t mean that thinking is something you need to avoid.
You then only end up having the purely objective mind, which remains within you. The objective mind does not weigh, does not judge on scales, places labels, make comparisons, from emotions that push to more and still analyze within the familiar.
The objective mind simply registers the facts. The facts that happen in the “outside world.” In our inner world, without interfering with the analysis and labeling of the ego-mind, we are initially harmonious, centered, filled with unreasonable joy, peace, silence, gratitude, peace and happiness.
Here are the real feelings. Which are different from emotions. Emotions are “causal; ” they emerge from external irritation and can be in any of the extremes of the swinging swing. Positive or negative. And being “external,” these emotions are perpetual, always variable. When we give the will to the objective mind, the mind records external events, but they do not influence or alter the original state of harmony, joy and grace.
This is actually the real “positive thinking” for me. With the difference that it is not positive, but objective, and not thinking, but “being.”
Is the glass half full or half empty? The glass is always full. Even the voids are full of potentials. Just the air to water ratios in the glass are different.
But for the casual observer, this probably looks like a “positive thinking” because one is usually calm, harmonious, smiling, good-natured, difficult to be embarrassed, difficult to be argumentative, to take sides, to try to persuade and defend a “position,” the “misfortunes” and the changes of fate do not particularly scare this person, and somehow this individual manages to be abundant and successful.
To illustrate the objective unreasonably happy and harmonious being, I will give you examples.
Today, for example, I overheard a conversation at the grocery store between two women discussing politics. These two women have never even thought that not just politics aren’t in a good state, but the entire system, the vicious schemes, making “valuable” papers from a group of people who buy virtue of some conventions, who are empowered with “the right” to transfer rights to others.
Like the right to have a dog at certain locations, the right to live at certain locations, the right to have a car, the right to breathe. And these women sounded very sweet and kind inside of the system, yet so sleepy that they don’t think there’s anything wrong with the system. As one of them stated herself, “Oh, it’s so complicated, why bother my brain with such complications.”
On the other side, I encountered a clerk woman several days ago. She poured so much light, joy and love on me. She had painted her walls with flowers, welcoming people with a smile, and warm words. She is there (in her words) to serve the good of the people. To be beneficial. To smile. To provide good advice, hope, and support. Because she believes we are the same and the recipe for longevity is to allow yourself to follow the natural rhythm of life, and to trust it. And the best compass in our lives is Love.
I had no desire to condemn the first two ladies, nor to clap to the other one, although she is worth an admiration.
All three of them were wonderful, so necessary, so merciful and relevant, that I can only keep my joy from running contrasts, instincts, and views.
There is always a choice; there is always a chance. And everywhere, there is a light, a light in full brilliance or none at all.
Another instance that comes to mind is when I was purchasing cherries from a local farmers market. The man selling the cherries lied to me for the weight and tried giving me spoiled cherries. I look at him, I smiled and said, “How sweet you lie, here’s a chocolate for you to reward you.” He took the chocolate and stood still. He didn’t know how to react.
You can always choose to reach with the injured ego, cheated and indignant. Which will only raise a scandal and cause hater and angriness. Because the ego-thinker immediately begins to analyze and compare – “it’s not right, it’s bad, this guy is a liar.” And the objective mind registers the incident, smiles and goes on without being emotionally influenced.
This is the high piloting of life. Yet, everyone needs to reach this moment of awareness. And often, people go through many shades of emotions and stuttering while they reach this level.
You can always choose whether to respond to the bright sun with, “Ugh, the sun is too hot,” or “Ah, the sun is smiling just like me.”
Undoubtedly, a scientifically proven fact is that a person’s harmonious adjustment to beauty, sharing, and joys in life lead not only to lasting good self-esteem, self-acceptance, and successful social life, but also to being able to rescue a person from the disharmonic states we call “illnesses.”
I have spoken about the relationship between thoughts-beliefs-emotions-health many times, and a number of innovative areas of science, psychology, and quantum physics prove this close relationship.
We are all individuals, unique, wonderful, gifted and self-sufficient. And in parallel, we realize our belonging to the “Whole,” develop our empathy, self-perception, the feeling of what the “Whole” is, the understanding, the awareness and the beauty of life.
And we become more and more aware of and knowing that our consciousness determines our being, not the opposite.
Remember that you write your own fairytale. What kind of bias it will have, and whether you will be able to avoid “traps” on the road depends only on your point of view.
Enjoyed reading? Please share. We are in this world to help one another. All of us grow faster when we support each other. I encourage others to add value to the world, so we can make compounding ripples of improvement for everyone.
About The Author
Dr. Mila is an internationally known Change Catalyst. She teaches individuals and organizations about awareness, connection, and the need for change – personally, socially, and professionally.