The day I decided to raise the rent of my Mental Property…

How I cleared my mental space for things that actually matter.

Thrive invites voices from many spheres to share their perspectives on our Community platform. Community stories are not commissioned by our editorial team, and opinions expressed by Community contributors do not reflect the opinions of Thrive or its employees. More information on our Community guidelines is available here.
Photo by kosal ley on Unsplash

I am in the process of enriching my mind with knowledge, love, peace, creativity and beautiful memories. Those who are adding value in some way or another, are most welcome to enter my mind and stay there for as long as they want.

Those who don’t add any value… Well, I have decided to kick them out.

For a long time, ever since I can remember I had a very bad mental habit of over thinking.

I used to welcome every single person into my mind.

Once this person entered my mental space, I used to make sure that they are cozy and comfortable in there by regularly nourishing them with my thoughts.

Every sentence, every action, every time someone was rude to me, ignored me, mocked me, looked at me weirdly, passed an insensitive comment about me, used a different tone while speaking with me… Every time this happened… I used to allow all these things enter my mind and then keep them alive by regularly thinking about them. As a result, my mind had no space left for thinking clearly about my progress, my creativity, my relationship with my loved ones, my personal growth…

Moreover, once I was introduced to the magical world of social media, I didn’t realize but I began letting the people whom I didn’t even know in person, enter my mind and occupy my mental space…

I can’t even imagine how many minutes, hours, days, in fact, years I must have wasted thinking about the people who have no positive contribution in my life whatsoever.

Unfortunately, we realize some things much later in life.

But it’s better late than never..Right??

When things got out of control for me, I decided to open up about this problem.

So I spoke to that one person with whom I have always shared every single emotion and thought.

My dad.

With teary eyes, I shared with him the extent to which my habit of overthinking had affected me…After patiently listening to all my stories, and concerns, my dad said something that stayed with me forever.

He said, “When these thoughts bother you, look up in the sky and think about the billions of galaxies out there… One of those galaxies belongs to the earth. On this earth, in one of the continents, in one of the countries, in one of the states, in one of the cities, in one of the suburbs, on one of the streets, there is a house ….in which you live. You have an opportunity to be a part of this amazing universe and for what we know for sure, you’ll only get ONE life. Don’t you think you should make the most of your existence?

Now think about your thoughts.. and answer me.. do they contribute in any way to your life, your happiness or your progress??

If the answer is YES, then keep on thinking…If the answer is NO…then throw these thoughts out of your mind. They don’t deserve to be there..”

That moment I realized, in order to enrich my mind I can’t afford to allow every single person to freely lodge and board in it. I have to filter the people whom I would permit to enter my thoughts.

Now, if someone’s behavior bothers me, I ask myself these questions –

1) Have I known this person long enough to let him/her affect my mental peace?

2) Does this person in any way go to contribute to my progress, productivity or happiness?

3) Will the absence of this person in my life, impact me in any way?

4) Would this person care if I fail or succeed in life??

If the answer to these questions is NO, then my approach towards that person becomes, indifferent.

Zero expectations, of support, encouragement, appreciation or trust.

It might sound ruthless but it has definitely helped me sort out my thoughts. Secondly, it has helped me understand the fact that when someone tries to pull you down, it’s not you.It’s them…

This approach has taught me empathy, given me a new perspective…

This approach has allowed me time and energy to think about the things that truly matter…to me.

The time we have is finite.

Let’s never forget that…

Most of us haven’t even met the person that we are destined to become. Most of us haven’t even discovered the talent and the capabilities that we possess within ourselves.

We have no idea what we are capable of doing.

However, in order to reach our utmost potential, we need to enrich our mind. We need to sharpen our mind on a daily basis.

We need to nourish it with creativity, productivity, positive thoughts, and knowledge. While we are doing this, there will be lots and lots of people out there who would try to pull us down. They will try to demotivate us, discourage us with their words, behavior, taunts, and actions.

Let them do what they are best at doing and let’s continue doing what’s best for us.

Let’s not dedicate our valuable time thinking about their bootless words and actions. Our mental space is precious, we must be extremely picky about who we allow entering our treasured mental space.

Our time is valuable and we shouldn’t spend even a second thinking about those who add no value to our lives. It might be a difficult to completely eliminate some people from our lives. But whether or not to let them stay in our mind…. WE get to decide that!

We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.