Being self-full is feeling a healthy fullness, with life’s choices available to you.
Self-awareness is about understanding yourself; your personal needs and wants and how you think and behave. Self-management is taking responsibility for your behaviour and wellbeing. Marry the two and I believe you have a healthy balance of self-care and self-fullness.
Here are four guideposts that I have found helpful to achieve healthy self-fullness.
Guidepost #1 PAUSE and become aware of the moment.
Being self-full requires both self-care and others-care. Authentic living allows authentic relationships.
A pause allows us to check in with what our body, soul, and mind is needing at a particular time. Is it stillness? Stimulation? Do you feel like soaking in a bubble bath — or dancing the night away with friends?
‘Self-care is making the choice to build a life you don’t need to regularly escape from’ Brianna Wiest
NB. Being self- full is knowing you can meet your self-care. Being selfish is wanting others to meet your self-care.
Invitation: How can you honour your mind, body and soul, today, with self-full self-care?
Guidepost #2 Know your stress triggers– manage what is manageable.
To expect a stress-less life is unrealistic. Good stress, or what psychologists refer to as “eustress,” is the type of stress we feel when we are excited about something positive; riding a roller coaster, competing for a promotion, a first date. Eustress can also help you achieve daily responsibilities and motivates you to reach your goals.
However, anxiety stress or fear will fatigue our adrenals and nervous system. Constant dis-ease can cause disease.
Our bodies are designed to react protectively to real danger — the fight/flight response — but, the counterbalance of rest and digest response is essential for healthy wellbeing. In rest and digest mode the body begins to repair itself after heightened stress levels, energy becomes conserved again, and your digestion improves. This requires self-care awareness.
Anxiety is always future-based, predicting the unknown. Our thoughts can be re-thought to allow a new perspective of the situation and regain a peaceful state of mind.
“Stress never feels as natural as peace does” Byron Katie
NB. An animal in the wild, after escaping becoming a predator’s dinner, will physically shake its body to release tension and return the body to its normal homeostasis.
Invitation: Can you reframe your thinking about something that currently feels stressful?
Guidepost #3 Choose gratitude for ‘what is’
Feeling disappointed is a result of broken expectations — expectations about relationships, expectations of life being a certain way.
Feeling grateful is a choice available to everyone. Developing an ‘attitude of gratitude’ has been scientifically proven to improve satisfaction with life: our wellbeing, relationships, and resilience to life’s negative events.
“As you rise with the morning sun, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive — to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love. “Marcus Aurelius.
NB. Life does not always go as planned, but keep planning as if it will.
Invitation: Is there a current life experience you can let go of the disappointment of ‘what was’ and accept the current possibilities of ‘what is?’
Guidepost #4 Change what only you can change
Self–full means to be full, being your authentic self. When we become empowered, with knowing who we are, we discover a truth that allows us to feel ‘ free to be me.’
But, being self-full does not mean being self-centred, self-absorbed, or self-indulging in unhealthy behaviours. Self-fullness is being responsible for yourself and the choices you make! Our daily choices create a ripple effect in all aspects of our life. Taking ownership of who you are and who you want to be is foundational for achieving positive change.
“Self-awareness precedes personal growth, and personal growth happens when we become aware of the aspects of our lives that we need to start improving in.” Kain Ramsay
NB. Each day, we get to choose our thoughts, feelings, actions, and attitudes.
Invitation: What steps on your life journey are you consciously taking responsibility for?
What areas of your life are you wanting to grow a healthy self-full lifestyle?
Living … it’s an adventure of a lifetime!