In my previous article, The 7 Toxic Relationships to Avoid, we looked at seven relationships to eliminate or avoid so we can make room for the relationships we need in our network. The following seven relationships are the direct opposites of the ones we looked at in my previous article. Through personal experience and working with others, I’ve learned a lot about people to avoid and people to look for. To grow, we must build with these people:
Doers – These people keep their word. If they say they’re going to do something, they do it. They’re not all talk. They’re more about action and you can see it no matter what the situation is.
Believers – Naysayers say “No” to everything. On the contrary, believers don’t necessarily say “Yes” to everything. But they believe the glass is half-full as opposed to half-empty. This is different from having “Yes” people. But positive people are about believing. Even if they don’t agree with how you want to achieve your goal they will redirect your steps rather than kill your dream.
Connectors – Gossip is a form of networking in the negative sense. Connecting, as we know it, is usually associated with teaming people with people and resources. It’s about giving as well as getting. Connecting is not just about getting with “important people” you think can help you or your organization. It’s always about being of service. I’ve met many people and have found new niches by “accident” through networking without always expecting something in return.
Dreamers – We’re inspired by those who not only dream but see their dreams fulfilled. Dreams require faith and often others don’t understand or get what we’re thinking. But that’s OK. Dream. Dream big. Let your imagination run wild and then work toward your big dreams little by little.
Gatekeepers – These are the people who can open doors for you. The key is to be nice to everyone, not just people you think are important. You never know who the gatekeepers are. They may not have the authority to make change but they can affect whether your plea to make change will be heard.
Mentors – Frenemies are only concerned about keeping you down in their world. Mentors are only concerned about building you up in your world. Mentors have a unique place. They have an interest in making us succeed yet they don’t have a vested interest in what we do. In other words, they are impartial observers who can tell us the truth without the risk of losing something. We need those who will tell us the truth, even when it hurts. A mentor is not necessarily a friend but they can be. But if they are a friend they should be a mentor first, then a friend second.
Visionaries – They help us to see beyond what’s directly in front of us. A carrot dangler focuses your energy on the one thing they put directly in front of you. A visionary helps you to see beyond what’s directly in front of you. To be great you will need to stretch yourself beyond what you can see directly in front of you. Visionaries help you to see those possibilities.
Whether it’s your work life, your social life, your love life or your spiritual life, relationships will be an important part of your success or failure. Also, relationships are fluid so where someone is now is not where they may be later. The same applies to you. To grow we must honestly assess where our relationships currently are, eliminate the toxic ones and make room for these seven relationships.