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Tameka Anderson: “Plan, Do, Review”

I would advise anyone who manages teams to work on themselves daily. That will allow you to see your blind spots while being influential. It also saves a lot of time. People will only follow a leader they trust. If people work for you and don’t trust you, it only leads to resentment then they […]

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I would advise anyone who manages teams to work on themselves daily. That will allow you to see your blind spots while being influential. It also saves a lot of time. People will only follow a leader they trust. If people work for you and don’t trust you, it only leads to resentment then they will eventually leave. So building trust starts with the leader being accountable to their team while leading in integrity.


As a part of our series about the five things you need to successfully manage a large team, I had the pleasure of interviewing Tameka Anderson, America’s F.U.N. Coach and Founder of Parenting Confident Kids. She helps moms of kids ages 4–12 overcome behavior issues.

After surviving a traumatic childhood and struggling with extreme behaviors, Tameka created innovative strategies to instantly eliminate challenging behaviors.

With 25 years of experience, Tameka now dedicates her life to helping families unlock their greatest potential, specializing in meeting emotional needs, effective communication skills, and building confidence.

Her programs have been used in private and Montessori schools.

She’s coached many youth TEDx speakers.

She’s been featured in Forbes, HuffPost, PopSugar, Authority Magazine, and many other international outlets.


Thank you so much for doing this with us! What is your “backstory”?

I was raised in Chicago’s turbulent foster care system and was a product of tall types of abuse and neglect. Because of the severe trauma I survived, I had extreme behavioral issues. Seeing how I was a child who was considered the problem child, I’ve learned the secrets to hacking any behaviors in a fraction of the time. Now I help busy moms of kids ages 4–12 learn how to eliminate behavioral challenges while having F.U.N. (Families Understanding Needs) parenting.

Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?

I believe it was my second year operating my summer camp program. I would be around in the camp to assist when needed so my staff had a look they would give when they needed help. This one particular day, I saw the staff struggling to get one child to come from under the table. One of our main rules is if it is unsafe they cannot do it and for a child to be under a table was considered unsafe because it could collapse.

One staff went to the table to get the child out. Then another came to assist and the child still didn’t come out. After three staffers came to assist to no avail, they looked to me and gave the signal for assistance.

I went to the table, bent down, and looked the child in the eye. I said, “I don’t know what’s going on but I want to help you figure it out so you have two choices. You could either come out so we can have a conversation and talk about what’s bothering you to help or stay under the table where it’s unsafe then I have to call your mom to come get you. Which one do you choose?”

She ran from under the table and we resolved the issue because she didn’t want to go home.

At the end of each day me and my staff do a “Plan, Do, Review” session and they asked me to show them how to get a child to do what I need so quickly. I taught them how to de-escalate, calm, and have a conversation with anyone.

Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

The funniest mistake I made when first starting was doing Facebook Ads. I was hosting an event and didn’t give myself enough time to promote (I believe it was literally a few days away from the event) so I chose the option on the Ad that showed to the most people in a shorter amount of time. I spent $200 in 20 minutes and no one signed up. LOL I laughed so hard (although it wasn’t funny really) and what I learned was to allow myself more lead time to promote and hire a professional to create the marketing campaign for me.

Ok, let’s jump to the core of our interview. Most times when people quit their jobs they actually “quit their managers”. What are your thoughts on the best way to retain great talent today?

I am one of those people who quit managers so I get it.

When I started my business I wanted to be the type of employer people loved to work with and for. My staff was given a weekly feedback survey to see how they were doing with our customers and I was also given a weekly feedback form to the staff to see how I was doing as a leader. I believe the best way to retain great talent is to be accountable as the leader.

You are not always right and if you are able to be accountable to your team there is nothing they wouldn’t do for you and the company.

How do you synchronize large teams to effectively work together?

Communication is king with effective teamwork. There’s no way in the world you can get a large team of people who hold different views, have different opinions and ideas, to work together unless there is a baseline of how the communication will be held.

Here is the main question of our discussion. Based on your personal experience, what are the “5 Things You Need To Know To Successfully Manage a Team”. (Please share a story or example for each, Ideally an example from your experience)

Because communication is so important in managing a team, I’ve developed a five-step system called “T.A.L.K.S.”

T- Start with the Truth

A- Ask questions

L- Listen more than you speak

K- Promote Kindness

S- Swap stories

Let me share a story of how this works.

Remember the story about how my staff wanted to learn how to get the child from under the table?

I started with the truth. The truth was the child was under the table and it wasn’t safe. The truth was also that I wanted her to come out so I could help her. So that’s exactly what I told her. Then once she came from under the table, I asked her questions about what made her run under the table, to begin with. Come to find out, she was angry with one of her siblings in the camp and wanted some time away from them and when the other camp counselors were telling her to come from under the table she said it made her angry because they didn’t ask nicely as Ms. Tameka did.

The more she spoke, the more questions I asked. The goal was for me to listen to her as much as possible. I wanted her to feel seen and heard.

Then when she’d explained everything, I’d asked her how she could do things differently the next time. Instead of running under the table and being unsafe, she decided that she could tell a camp counselor that she needed time to herself. This way it promotes kindness without leaving anyone feeling bad about their choices.

After that, I told her a story about me also having siblings and how they get on my nerves sometimes however I’ve learned how to share with them what I need so that we can have a great relationship. She laughed and trust was strengthened in that moment.

What advice would you give to other CEOs or founders to help their employees to thrive?

I would advise anyone who manages teams to work on themselves daily. That will allow you to see your blind spots while being influential. It also saves a lot of time. People will only follow a leader they trust. If people work for you and don’t trust you, it only leads to resentment then they will eventually leave. So building trust starts with the leader being accountable to their team while leading in integrity.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂

The movement I would inspire would be families communicating more effectively because as Whitney Houston says in her song, ‘I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way.’ When we help families raise awesome children, we are essentially equipping the future leaders of the world.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?

One of my favorite leaders, Maya Angelou said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel” and this is a quote I live by. My goal in each interaction with people is to make them feel three things: seen, heard, and loved. As long as I’m doing this, I know I can lead any sized team to victory.

Thank you for these great insights!

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