Stop Being Such a Jerk to Yourself

If you think of yourself as the enemy, you'll never heal your life.

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It turns out Facebook is still good for something.

I scrolled past a post that was probably meant to motivate, but it said,“Your future self is talking shit about you right now.”Well, future self, that’s a crappy attitude on your part.

If you want a life with ample inner peace, happiness, health, ease, self-worth, and success, love yourself instead.

Love all the versions of yourself, the past, the present, and the future. And, to really bend your brain, get into the mind of your future self, look back at your current self, and just love it. Love it fiercely and unconditionally, because not many other people are going to do that for you in the human world.

There are a lot of battles to wage in a lifetime. I advocate for having as few as possible and for reserving them to the profound issues that define your values. The last thing on your list should be battling yourself. Strike that, battling yourself shouldn’t even make the list.

That doesn’t mean we don’t all have growth to make and habits to break. I write and I run this publication to help people be the best versions of themselves. But, if you think of yourself as the enemy, you’ll never heal.

If you think of yourself as the enemy, you’ll never heal.

Choose to be friends with yourself instead.

If you’ve be a jerk to yourself over the years, reframe how you look at things. You made choices in your past that you may not be happy with today, but you also did some great and epic things. You’ve grown. You’ve gotten to where you are right now.

Like your past, today is a mix of satisfaction and dissatisfaction. You still have dreams to reach and roadblocks to break through. If you’re feeling down on yourself because you know you can do more, take a deep breath, and love yourself anyway.

To at times feel dissatisfied, to want more, or to miss a target is part of being human, but none of that matters when it comes to loving yourself. The key to a healed and happy life is loving yourself through it all. Love yourself unconditionally. That means love yourself in the past, the present and the future. It means love yourself even though…fill in the blank.

Try this.

This is a guided meditation I use with clients, but you can do it on your own with a few instructions.

  • Get in a comfortable position. Remove distractions like your phone, bright lights, and noises.
  • Close your eyes and take a few relaxing breaths. Try a simple sigh or “haaaa” sound as you exhale.
  • With your eyes closed, picture a timeline in your mind. It will either extend left to right or back to front. The future is to the right or in front of you depending on your preference.
  • Picture yourself in the center of this timeline. Look to your right or ahead of you and see the future you.
  • You and your future self walk toward each other and meet in the middle.
    Let your future you embrace you with love. Your future you may have encouragement or wisdom to share, but it’s only with love.
  • Together, you and your future self look to the left or to the back and see yourself as a small child. Look upon that small child with immense, unconditional love. If the child would like to join you, let it join you and embrace it.
  • Spend as much time as you need together. Embracing, loving, accepting each other.
  • When you’re ready, you each return to your points on the timeline, but by now you know, it’s all one. Time is an illusion. You’re simultaneously all versions of yourself, and they’re all perfect.

The ego loves to complicate things, but the answers to life’s deepest questions are simple. Love yourself, past, present, and future. That’s the simple answer that can transform your life.

These posts reveal more about healing your life by loving yourself:

Instead of Advice, Give Your Younger Self Forgiveness, and Body, Be My Friend

Get my new book Happy Ever After and learn how to cultivate true and lasting happiness in your life. 

I made a free 5-day Mastering Happiness email course, and I want to share it with you! Visit me at christinebradstreet.com where you can get your course for free.

Cross posted at www.christinebradstreet.com and Change Your Mind Change Your Life at Medium

All images open source from pixabay.com.

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