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3 Ways to Shift Frustration If You're Feeling Stuck

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Jill Sylvester, LMHC

When you are frustrated, whether in your work, your relationships, or with yourself, consider these three strategies to shift the low vibe that happens to us all:

1.) State your Feelings. Face the beast. Stop adding more frustration by running from the problem, the situation, the feelings. Stop and say to yourself, or out loud which is even more powerful: “I am mad because”… “I am frustrated because”… “I am sad that this hasn’t worked out yet.” Own the feelings. They’re yours. They matter. Cause once you own them, you can identify the opportunity that lies like a jewel in the wreckage that helps move you in the right direction.

2.) Change Your Thinking. You know doing the same things over and over is the definition of insanity. Once you identify your feelings, you can see where you might be thinking incongruently with what it is you want to achieve. For example, a recent client of mine was frustrated with not having her work seen by those she was trying to impress. Once she was able to identify her feelings of disappointment, sadness and impatience, she was able to see how she was hyper focused on what wasn’t working versus all the things that were going right: she was improving as an artist, she was receiving consistent feedback on her work and most importantly, she loved painting, for the sheer joy of painting. Independent of her business goals, she realized that she was grateful she had found her passion and that she was able to do something on a daily basis that she loved. Changing the way you view the situation will immediately change the way you feel about the situation. 

3.) Free Yourself From Negativity. Once you realize that you are participating in your own chaos, you can start to be the conductor of your symphony. If you are focused on negativity, you will only see, hear, feel, smell and taste negativity. That’s what you are emitting, it’s the very best you can do with what you have to work with. Understand that by changing the way you are thinking and therefore feeling, you can now create what you want to have. It’s like a key that lets you out of that low frequency space. 

If you don’t like where you are standing, lift your head up and look for the opportunity the universe is giving you in your moments. There is always two sides to a coin. If you are thinking negatively, what would the angel on the other side of your shoulder say? Tap into that resource. Once you do, you will rise up to a higher realm of thought which creates a more positive feeling, which then ultimately stacks the odds in your favor for a more positive result. 

Jill Sylvester is a licensed mental health counselor, author of the Nautilus award winning book,”Trust Your Intuition: 100 Ways to Transform Anxiety and Depression for Stronger Mental Health,” and host of the “Trust Your Intuition Podcast.” Her work has been featured in Well+Good, Bustle, SheKnows, WorkingMother, Parenthood, TeenMentor, and To receive her weekly blog offering strategies to better your life, subscribe at

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