“Shift from settle and survive to accelerate and thrive” with Kimberly Lou and Dr. William Seeds

The movement would be to shift from settle and survive to accelerate and thrive into a life that we love. So many times, we settle in life because we have this programming in our minds that tell us we are not enough and that the world is not safe. It is the very reason we […]

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The movement would be to shift from settle and survive to accelerate and thrive into a life that we love. So many times, we settle in life because we have this programming in our minds that tell us we are not enough and that the world is not safe. It is the very reason we end up burned out from life, because our brains end up exhausted from our spinning thoughts. We need to let go of these old belief systems and create a new one. If you are going to tell a story about your life, let us make it one that serves us.

I had the pleasure of interviewing Kimberly Lou. Kimberley is an integrative life mentor who coaches top CEOs, entrepreneurs, celebrities, and world class level athletes from all around the world. She helps them accelerate and thrive through mental focus, emotional fitness, and physical training. Her program is perfect for people looking for more than just standard life coaching. Her program dives deeper and aims to help people excel at the maximum level of their ability. She expands the concept of “fitness” to address personal accountability, mindset, nutrition and physical exercise — a fully cohesive approach to sustainable health and success. Kimberly Lou always says, “If you’re going to tell a story of your life, then make it a good one. Because whatever you say goes.” Kimberly Lou’s own story was one of addiction, eating disorders, and both professional and personal burnout. However, she was able to take responsibility and change the story of her life. She believes that every person has that same ability to take control of their own life story by finding and addressing the three core elements of Emotional Fitness — emotive, mental and physical — and then applying all these tools into practice. She is here to help you write that story now!

Thank you so much for doing this with us! What is your “backstory”?

When I started my journey, I was completely imbalanced. I weighed close to 200 pounds, was smoking two packs of cigarettes each day, and I had neither a plan nor an income. I had a sev­enth-grade education, and I had just left my husband of ten years. Furthermore, my career of 16 years had come crashing to a halt. To say that I was at the lowest of lows was an understate­ment: I was sleeping on a friend’s floor trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I had lost my sense of purpose, my energy, and all hope. As a result, I turned to my usual support systems in the form of drugs, alcohol, and bingeing and purg­ing six times a day. I was an emotional wreck, completely chained down by my addictions, my negative mindset, and my victim consciousness. Each time I tried to make a change, I would quickly just burn out and quit because my lifestyle and plan were unsustainable.

These days, my life is more than a little different. I just returned from an amazing two-week trip to London with my beau­tiful daughter. Instead of living in my car, I am now living in my dream home and driving a new luxury SUV. I am in the best shape of my life. In addition, as an Integrative Mentor who coaches High Achievers, I have been featured on many media platforms, landed a spot on a number-one-ranked radio show, and have appeared on E! Entertainment, MTV, HBO, ESPN, MSNBC, and ShowTime.

Can you share the interesting story that happened to you since you started your career?

My story is one of persistence. I did not succeed with looks, confidence, or even an education, but I had something most people do not: a purpose. That purpose came once I had my daughter. I knew that I had to step up. I had to learn to be the kind of woman that I wanted my daughter to grow up to be. So, I learned that whenever I said, “I can’t” or I don’t know”, what it really meant was that I did not want to, and that I didn’t want to be bothered with what I thought I was required to succeed. If I did not want to be the victim of my life anymore, I stop blaming others for my problems, face up and assume my part of whatever was not working in my life and do it differently. I sat quietly each day and asked myself “Who is the person I want my daughter to grow up to be?” I sat until the answers came. I had to learn to let go of old limited belief systems and create a new one, but I didn’t not know how. I started reading every book I could find, which is now more than a 1000 to date. I would find people who I thought where successful and I offered to help them out just so I could be close to them. As I did that, I watched their habits, whether they were good or not so good. I realized that everyone I had met, whether they were rich or poor, had one thing in a common. They had a belief system that helped them in certain areas of their lives, but that belief system was also the very thing holding them back in other ways. Every day, I would research knowledge and every day, I would apply that knowledge. It was not a pretty process. I made mistakes, but with every mistake I made, I also learned what not to do, until I reach my desired goals.

Can you share a story about the funniest mistake you made when you were first starting? Can you tell us what lesson you learned from that?

(This wasn’t in my career but it pertains to my career.)

When I was 14, I spent most of my days going to the beach. I was a beach girl, even though it took me over two hours each way by bus to get there. I did not care. The pleasure I experienced when I arrived was worth the four-hour ride. It was a perfect summer’s day. As I ran to the water, leaving a trail of clothes behind me, I knew my personal freedom was merely moments away. My body hit the water, and I felt the cool ocean on my skin. It was refreshing! I splashed, I played, and then suddenly, I felt something take me under the water!

As I battled to swim my way to the surface for air, a wave came crashing down, forcing me down again to the bottom of the ocean. I struggled to swim back to the surface. Yet another wave pushed and then pulled me to the bottom. I concluded that I was going to die. I knew I would! Looking back, I had no idea that this would be a sign of things to come, a way of living that would take me out if I didn’t do anything about it. As I struggled to the surface, a lifeguard ran my way. I thought that maybe he would save me. However, for some reason he stopped; the lifeguard who was supposed to save me stopped! Why was he not running into the water to pull me out? What was wrong with him? He just stood there, shouting as if I could hear him.

I screamed in anger and sheer panic, “Save me!”

He shouted again. Clearly, this man saw me struggling! Why was he not helping me?

Tears were streaming down my face, as I shouted, “Please save me!”

Once again, he yelled, but this time I heard him. “Stand up!”

“Stand up?” I shouted back. “How?”

“Just put your feet down onto the ground and stand up.” he replied.

To my amazement, my feet planted firmly onto the sand. Apparently, I had been drowning in two feet of water! Ashamed, embarrassed, (hey, that lifeguard was super cute), and exhausted from my experience, I picked up my shattered ego and crawled onto my towel where I lay sobbing. That experience would become symbolic for many of my life experiences to come. Many times, I allowed my emotions to overtake me, so much that it even caused illness to the point of PTSD. If I had known then what I know now — that I had the ability to save myself — I would have been able to salvage my broken marriage, I would have had the self-worth to obtain the job of my dreams, and I could have recovered my health without creating the stress-induced autoimmune disorder that was robbing me of my serenity. When I look back now, there are parts of me that are grateful that I was able to experience and overcome these things. However, I needlessly suffered, and I did not want to drown in my emotions any longer. It was time for a change.

Are you working on any new or exciting projects now?

Yes. Becoming Who You’re Meant To Be is a book that I just finished writing. It details my Hero’s Journey to healing. It is a step by step guide for others to do the same. It was not until I stopped trying to force myself to make huge changes all at once that I started developing new patterns. By adding simple, small steps, I replaced my negative habits with healthy positive changes one little step at a time. I also created a community of free online resources to help others shift from just settling and surviving, into accelerating and thriving into a life that they love.

None of us are able to achieve success without some help along the way. Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?

In my experience, I have had friends who were there for me when I was down. I appreciated them very much. However, when I started growing in success, they became bitter and jealous. It’s the people who stick around and love you unconditionally, even when you succeed that can be challenging to find. My beautiful friend DeAnna Jordan Crosby, owner of New Method Wellness is my person. There are people who listen to you and then there are people who will understand you. People who listen with their entire being. Deanna is the first women to ever celebrate my success and genuinely be happy for me. She taught me that women can and should build each other up, inspire each other, and be there for one another through all the bad times, all the amazing successes and everywhere in between. She gets me and I am eternally thankful for that.

Can you share your top three “lifestyle tweaks” that will help people feel great?

Life these days can move very quickly and it can be difficult to keep up with our schedules, let alone have the energy to sustain them effectively. The following three things have helped me take my rocket ship (which I call my body) to the moon, mentally, emotionally and physically!

Nutrition is super important, especially at certain times of the day. Additionally, saturated fats also help with sustaining blood sugar levels, energy, and vitality. Yes, you heard me right. Saturated fats. Many people will tell you not to eat saturated fats. They say that they are not good for your heart. Yes, that is true, but only if you eat them in large quantities. However, if you eat one teaspoon of grass-fed butter or coconut oil in the morning and afternoon, it can actually sustain your energy throughout the day, decreases hunger cravings, sustain your energy, and help with brain fog. Also, fat is an emulsifier, which means the body uses it to draw in nutrients to help with vitamin absorption. Also, because cortisol levels rise and fall throughout the day you will want to stick with eating breakfast from 7 to 8 am, lunch from 11am-12pm, snacks from 2pm-4pm, dinner from 5pm-6pm and snack again from 9pm-10pm to help keep you steady.

I must also take care of myself. It is the most important thing! At times, I can work with over 200 people in a week, and afterwards I must come home and be there for my family. If I am not at my peak, everyone suffers, especially me. I must prepare my mind and body to withstand my schedule. How do I do that? I read, write, meditate, and do mild cardio first thing in the morning every day. I call this my hour of power. Remember that first hour of the day after waking is gold. It is when your brain is at the most receptive to reprogramming, so spend that time wisely. It is what helps me mentally and physically prepare for my day to come.

Next, I make sure that I acquire adequate rest. Sleep is very important, but it is the times in which you sleep that helps with brain function. 10PM to 6AM is the sweet spot. 10PM-2AM is for brain recovery, and 2AM- 6AM is for body recovery. Additionally, studies have shown that for every hour of sleep before 10PM is like acquiring two. If I do not have enough sleep, I cannot sustain my schedule because my body is not recovering properly.

Is there a particular book that made an impact on you? Can you share a story?

There are several books. I have read over 1000 books. The Power of the Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy, is my favorite. This book explains the inner workings of the mind and gives direction on how to tap into your unconscious mind in a simple manner. I remember reading this book, because, at the time, I thought, “If there was a God, how could he be so unforgiving and punishing?” If there was a God, I didn’t want anything to do with him, but I knew there was something about the unconscious mind I could climb on board with. I became obsessed with studying the mind and tapping into inner resources I never knew I had.

If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of wellness to the most amount of people, what would that be?

The movement would be to shift from settle and survive to accelerate and thrive into a life that we love. So many times, we settle in life because we have this programming in our minds that tell us we are not enough and that the world is not safe. It is the very reason we end up burned out from life, because our brains end up exhausted from our spinning thoughts. We need to let go of these old belief systems and create a new one. If you are going to tell a story about your life, let us make it one that serves us.

How have you used your success to bring goodness to the world?

Because we are living a fast-paced lifestyle, we tend to forget to connect with people daily. Especially, the ones we love the most. As a result, many people seem like they have it together on the outside, but really, they are suffering and lonely on the inside, even amongst a crowd. When you can connect with a person through a simple gesture, you would be surprised at how much it brightens their day! I find when you truly listen to the subtext behind the words people are saying, or not saying, they feel valued. Many people do not listen with their hearts. It is important to hear the words behind the words that are spoken and unspoken. My talent is listening to people with my entire being so that when I connect with them, it is on a soul healing level.

What are your “5 Things I Wish Someone Told Me Before I Started” and why. (Please share a story or example for each.)

1. I wish someone had told me to trust my gut, no matter what. My gut has never steered me wrong. So many times, I have trusted others to make decisions for me. What I learned was that, my gut instincts never steered me wrong and when I trusted others to make decisions for me, ultimately, they were not the best thing for me and I suffered.

2. I wished someone told me it was ok to make mistakes. I was told that mistakes are part of the journey, and that not only was I going to make mistakes daily, but that those failures were necessary for me to succeed. It was those mistakes brought me to my knees, which in turn taught me humility. That humility allowed me to relate to everyone on a whole other soul level.

3. I wish someone would have told me that it is ok to ask for help, but also that if I didn’t have it, I wouldn’t be able to succeed, because I can’t do everything myself. This was true for me especially when I gave birth to my daughter. I tried to do everything myself and we both suffered. I was so afraid to let people in. I had been burned so many times before. As a result, we both suffered and I was forced to find a community of support. Thank God I did.

4. I wish someone told me to see my part in everything. By seeing my part in every situation, I relinquish being the victim and by doing so, I can then ultimately take my power back. So many times, I have blamed other people for my failures. Which kept me stuck. When I stopped blaming others and making them wrong for my mistakes, own my part in them and took appropriate action, that’s when my life became amazing.

5. I wish someone told me to pay full price and stop trying to get a deal for people’s services. In the end, by trying to get a deal, I received what I paid for and ended up paying for services twice as much, because I had to redo my work Owning your own business can be expensive. I would try to hire people or make deals and trade with them. What happened was that they felt undervalued and retaliated. Today, I pay people what they are worth and then some. They tend to step up and pick up the phone when I do.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”?

If you are going to tell a story about your life, you might as well make it a good one, because whatever you say goes! It is true! I notice that I manifest whatever it is I am focusing on, whether it is good or not good. I’ve learned to rewrite the story of my life. I want to help others do the same.

Some of the biggest names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them :-).

There is not just one, but many people who have touched my life in many ways. They have no idea of who I am! However, through me they have helped thousands of people. The people I admire most and would LOVE to meet are Tony Robbins, Oprah Winfrey, Ellen, Rachel Hollis, and Ester Hicks.

What is the best way our readers can follow you on social media?

Instagram: KimLouCoach

Facebook: Kimberly Lou Coaching

UTUBE Kimberly Lou

Thank you for all of these great insights!

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