Have you ever predicted that something undesirable would happen to you, and it came true?
For example, when you believed you were going to have an awful day and then it happened — your dog got sick on the new rug, you spilled coffee on your blouse on the way to the office, you were late to your important client meeting because you had to return home to change… you were irritable and overwhelmed the entire day.
But… was it premonition? Or… was it a self-fulfilling prophecy?
It might be hard to hear… but the truth is, these kinds of negative self-fulfilling prophecies are setting you up to fail. What if you could use them to set yourself up for success instead?
In this article, we’ll explore the self-fulfilling prophecy — what is it, how it can harm you, and how you can use it to access the joy and ease you desire.
What is a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy?
A self-fulfilling prophecy occurs when you predict an outcome, and you then take actions that effectively create that end result.
A self-fulfilling prophecy can be hard to spot because you often perform those actions subconsciously. You don’t realize you’re going against your well-being in the moment.
For example, if you have low self-esteem, you might feel you’re unworthy of love and joy. Because you believe you’re unworthy, you stop loving and caring for yourself and building support systems.
Unfortunately, the above scenario is unconducive to personal growth and limits the potential for love and joy in your life.
The Harmful Effects of a Negative Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
If your self-fulfilling prophecies tell you that you’re not smart enough or pretty enough or not worthy and you believe it, it can seriously harm your well-being. You may experience:
- Social withdrawal
- Substance abuse
Self-fulfilling prophecies confirm the powerful connection between your belief and actions. Your thoughts influence your actions, and your actions perpetuate your beliefs.
Once these limiting beliefs take hold of your life, the cycle repeats. Your thoughts tell you you’re not good enough, you take actions against your well-being, and your reality then confirms your beliefs.
When you’re stuck in this loop, what can you do about it?
Breaking the Cycle
As with anything, awareness is the first step toward breaking this cycle. By acknowledging that this pattern exists, you can then take steps to change it.
The following tips will help you curb your self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviors. Then you can choose beliefs that empower you instead.
Create a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy That Empowers You
#1 Stop the All or Nothing Mentality
Have you ever experienced thoughts like this?
- I always screw things up.
- I will never find someone who loves me because I can’t even love myself.
- This always happens, no matter what I do.
- I’ll never find peace.
Your language influences your beliefs. Words like “always” and “never” contribute to self-limiting phrases that make it easy to perpetuate what isn’t true. This binary makes it easier to fall prey to unwanted self-fulfilling prophecies.
But here’s the thing, life isn’t an all or nothing scenario.
Life may not go your way 100% of the time, but you can still influence what you do and how you react. If you fail once, it does not mean you’re destined for failure forever.
You are not a victim of your circumstances.
The next time you experience a setback, accept that it happened. Then, find the lesson and use it to your advantage in the future.
#2 Acknowledge and Embrace Your Strengths
If I asked you to create a list of your strengths, how difficult of a task would it be?
Would you have to think for a moment? How long would your list be?
See, we often create self-fulfilling prophecies because we believe we’re without strengths.
However, that is untrue.
Each woman — yes, that means YOU — has the capacity to grow, receive love, and experience joy. You can manifest your gifts and share them with the people around you.
I invite you to list all your achievements and strengths now. Your strengths could be interpersonal, like amazing listening skills, or professional, like impeccable time management. List all of them.
If you’re struggling with your list, ask a trustworthy friend what they experience as your strengths. Seeing yourself through the eyes of a cherished companion can help you recognize the value and worth hiding behind your self-critical dialogue.
#3 Visualize Success
We often associate self-fulfilling prophecies with adverse outcomes. But what if you could, instead, predict a favorable scenario? Instead of imagining failure, you see yourself overcoming your challenges.
When you visualize success, you prime your mind and body to manifest that outcome. “The brain is getting trained for actual performance during visualization,” said AJ Adams, MAPP with Psychology Today, “It’s been found that mental practices can enhance motivation, increase confidence and self-efficacy, improve motor performance, prime your brain for success, and increase states of flow.”
So, how do you do it?
Focus on sensory and emotional details:
- Visualize the setting. (Where are you? Are you alone or with people? Is it the morning or afternoon?) Be specific.
- Imagine each individual action necessary to manifest your success.
- Picture yourself successfully performing those actions.
- Experience how you’d feel completing each action.
- Embrace the glow and pride you’d feel when you’ve accomplished your goal.
When you imagine yourself taking the actions and experiencing the rewards of success, you can manifest that vision as your reality.
#4 Overcome Your Mental and Emotional Blocks
Despite your best efforts, it can sometimes feel like you’re getting nowhere. Unfortunately, you may have some type of mental or emotional block hampering your growth.
If so, you will need to dissolve those mental and emotional blocks to claim the life you desire. Until you do, you’re more likely to experience undesirable self-fulfilling prophecies.
For additional support with overcoming those blocks and manifesting greater ease and joy in your life, claim your Complimentary “Overcoming Overwhelm” Discovery session with me.
In this 60-minute consultation, you’ll:
- Reveal a clear and compelling vision of what else is possible for your life when you no longer have so much on your plate and are enjoying your life again
- Get simple and practical tips for how to break free from your symptoms of overwhelm
- Tap into greater energy and inspiration
- Explore how having a partner on your journey will provide a shortcut to all that you desire.