Finding Strength By Looking Within

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Photo by Sindre Strøm from Pexels
Photo by Sindre Strøm from Pexels

A close friend of mine reminded me of exactly who I am yesterday, as close friends have a way of doing. She said something so profound that it made me just feel understood. How I wish others would see me in that light, someone who sees the tiny fractures but still appreciates what I have to give.

I have been feeling a bit unsettled lately, a combination of emotions, dealing with some sadness, perhaps a few shadows from the past. I don’t really reach out when I should, but there is really no one to reach out to. Everyone is so busy handling their own lives, putting out fires, that I tend to just not want to add to the baggage and keep it to myself. I’m one to just shrug it off, isolate myself and find comfort in long walks, writing, listening to music, and self-care time. To be honest, there are times when I wish I could say that I just need a hug, to be told that everything will eventually be alright and that what I am feeling is a spiritual growth spurt. Sometimes, the universe and our hearts are a bit out of sync. What is brought into your life doesn’t always give us time to adjust. We are left scrambling to catch up, to readjust our inner compass. In many cases, things don’t always look the way we envisioned them or planned them out in the file folders of our essence.

What my friend said was “Creatives need their brokenness.”
It couldn’t have been truer. Her words rang in my ears. It is from that place that beauty is born. It is in those tears, those deep emotions, the heartbreak, that our talent flows. We draw from it like a well. Because we know pain, we can appreciate joy. Because we have known sorrow, we feel from the heart. We have learned deep compassion because we know what it feels like to be alone. Our eyes pick up on different nuances. We learn to tell the difference between a simple smile and one that comes from the soul, that lights up someone’s eyes. We have learned to love completely because loving ourselves was the only thing that saved us. We are complete even with the little fissures that form now and then beneath the surface. We have accepted who we are and can fully embrace all the sides of someone else. Reality is something we are used to. Empathy is our brother. We hold on dearly to authenticity like a child who holds their favorite toy.

It is in that brokenness that we found our strength. It is in our words that we write, it is in the way one hand-paints mountains and blue water, it is in colors captured in a photograph, in lyrics so beautiful they bring tears to your eyes, and it whispers in garments made of silk and satin.

It is a reflection of ourselves.

Originally published at P.S. I Love you

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