Real Talk

Texting does not equal better connections.

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It seems we are living in the digital age of communication. Where texting and e-mails have become the preferred method of communication nowadays. I admit, these modes of communication are in MANY ways advantageous, convenient, and useful. However; talking, on the phone that is, still works. And in fact the preferred method in many situations.

If you are “lucky” enough to be in the dating world, and I say that loosely, due to my own personal situation, you have experienced what I am about to write. In talking with many of my single, divorced, otherwise available friends, I am finding that texting has become the preferred method for building a relationship, and getting to know someone. I once had a friend tell me that she basically had a long conversation with a guy, and when I asked her what his body language said; she responded, “we were texting.” What?! I refuse to have a full blown conversation with a guy who says he’s interested in getting to know me, via text. Maybe this appropriate for the younger generation, or maybe not (there’s research and data, that suggest otherwise), but for adults, and middle age people, TALKING still works folks. Real men, will pick up the damn phone, if really interested, and talk to you. He will want to hear your voice, spend time with you, not waste it with meaningless text messages. There are certain things that just never go out of style; the phrases, please and thank you, and yes, having an actual conversation. Don’t get me wrong I am not anti-text, I too, use it as a tool for quick messages and responses, but if going into deeper conversations, I’d much rather talk it out. It’s more meaningful to me, that way, I get to hear you smile and laugh, as opposed to using an emoji to emote that feeling.

On my website,, I talk about this very subject in detail. And I list the three T’s in getting to know someone; Time, Talking, and Together. These are often the keys to unlocking a potential meaningful relationship; whether it’s a friendship or a romantic courtship. Let’s not bypass this process for the sake of juggling; you know, texting multiple people at the same time. When talking to someone, you can only talk to one person at a time. Ladies, and Gentlemen, choose; to juggle or not to be juggled.

All the best to us all on this journey to better connections.

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