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Positively Uncomfortable Day 10: Instant Gratification Woes

Delayed Gratification is Key!

Today we dive into the mindset of instant gratification which is starving the growth of our nation.

One of my goals of life when I awakened was to gain clarity on my life while it was still happening, so I could do something with it and impact people! Instant gratification is something that holds us back from personal growth and something that we crave every day. It is a long, messy process to get away from showing others you are having a good time because gratification from others is one of the key ingredients in today’s work to prove our own self-worth and validation. But personal growth starts when you start shifting instant gratification to delayed/invisible gratification when you are out of your comfort zone.

That being said a couple of misconceptions and notes on my research on this topic

  • Drinking an ice-cold sprite, playing video games, having a nice joint to burn, or maybe a smooth crispy Stella is totally cool to indulge in when you are in control and fully in intentional enjoyment phase. However, using any of them as an instant gratification tool to fix your problems is only going to drift you further away from being yourself.
  • True self-worth comes from impressing yourself with your own growth and improvement and taking action on goals being the best possible version of your authentic self every day, not talking and trying to please other people with accomplishments. No one wants to hear that shit.
  • Everyone has the power to be worthy, but the first step if gratifying yourself by being yourself without harming others and making others feel unworthy.
  • Don’t let external gratification blind achieving your own personal growth. We are having an external gratification crisis of checking boxes that entitles and justifies us to instantly gratify us with cheap thrills on the weekends because we are continue to move up the ladder of checking the boxes. Remember, fulfillment and gratification start once your check the proper boxes and start getting out of your comfort zone. (See Day 1 if you still don’t get it https://brandonlabella.com/2018/03/01/positively-uncomfortable-day1/ )

Brandon’s Fail Down. I always thought that telling, bragging, and doing was super cool. Again, and again the chatter would be “I had an unreal weekend dude you missed out at bars” or “yoooo I have been doing abs for an hour this week! Get on my level.” Part of this stems from the fact that I wanted gratification for doing what I was doing. Telling people you are working hard gives you instant gratification, not sustainable gratification. It also tricks your mind into thinking that you are more productive then you actually are.

It’s just like the game of life and our addictions to food, social media, drugs, alcohol etc. I asked Lewis Howes on our one on one how do we balance the now vs. later game in a world that demands instant gratification. In this world today, we strive for instant gratification and focus on the things that make us feel good now, without thinking/caring about the long-term problems it will cause later on. We all make multiple decisions every day that involve this dilemma (Going to gym, Eating Cake, Drinking, Smoking Weed etc.) and it is important to find ways to give yourself short-term gratification doing things that make you uncomfortable in the short term. Creating challenges and games within each activity you do will make satisfied on a short-term basis while creating “Little Wins” that keep you going. As I move forward, I have created small games within each of my activities in order to get the most value out of the activity for myself, make the activity worthwhile for others, and find gratification in the moment that aligns with my long term vision. I challenge everyone to embrace short-term uncomfortable situations and attack them with challenges that create “little wins,” because I believe it will lead to more happiness in the long term while still giving you short-term satisfaction!!

So what if your friends think your taking this instant gratification thing to seriously. Why can’t you enjoy a couple of beers with your friends out on the weekends? I discussed this exact issue with one of my buddies shooting hoops and we couldn’t agree more on the topic. When you are forced to engage in activities you don’t want to do because of peer pressure, you obviously will regret caving in. But what about that lonely feeling that arises when everyone is hammered at the bar and you are drinking a club soda with lime? I actually have grown accustomed to this situation and smile. Because it proves to me I can be what I want, implement self-control, and still enjoy my friends for who they are and enjoy the good times in the past. It’s all a mindset. You can always bring a gallon of water/ a 6 pack of La Croix to a party and feel comfortable being yourself not drinking!

The only way to create sustainable gratification is through invisible gratification, which means doing things because you truly want to do them without the need to get approval from others. It’s these types of moments where you feel like you are on top, because no one else knows how you helped someone else. Try it sometime

How to Take Action:

  • Ask Yourself Whether Your Action is Helping You To Become Where and Who You Want To Be In 5-10 Years
  • Invest In Yourself and Put Skin In the Game -> Delayed Gratification Will Ensue and You Will Completely Ignore Those Instant Urges and Set Yourself Up For Fulfillment
  • Find the most challenging problem that is achievable and accomplish it in the next 10 weeks to challenge your mind and body to the test.
  • Make Hard Decisions, Pass Easy Decisions Over to Others -> It makes you less replaceable and enhances delayed gratification.

Today’s Content

Learn How To Invest In Yourself and Find Fulfillment Through Challenging Yourself

https://soundcloud.com/brandon-labella/failing-up-ep-005-challenge

Learn How To Avoid Instant Gratification by Being Genuine

https://soundcloud.com/brandon-labella/carveyourownmountain

If you like my content, feel free to share to educate and inspire others to reach their full potential or follow my journey by:

Subscribing to My Weekly Newsletter of Positive Inspiration

https://brandonlabella.com/

Pre-Ordering My New Book

http://brandonlabella.com/failfreely/

I am so excited for what March has in store for all of us! Wishing you an amazing month free, fulfilled, and happy!

With <3,

Positive

Originally published at brandonlabella.com

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