Wisdom//

10 Parenting Rules Busy Philipps Follows

Why the actress learned to say yes to saying no.

Brian Ach / Getty Images
Brian Ach / Getty Images

Most people know Busy Philipps best for her roles on TV shows like Cougar Town and Dawson’s Creek and movies like The Gift and I Feel Pretty. But fellow parents also know and adore Busy for her parenting style and the parenting rules Busy Philipps follows could be considered an acceptable path for other parents to follow.

In 2007, Busy married producer Marc Silverstein and together, they have two daughters, Birdie Leigh Silverstein and Cricket Pearl Silverstein. In the 11 years that Busy has been a mom, she has picked up a few tips and tricks. These 10 parenting rules Busy Philipps follows could be just what you need to be a cool mom yourself.

10. IT’S OK TO SAY NO

Busy opened up to Parents magazine about being an “overextender” and said she had to learn the hard way that it’s okay to say no when it comes to your kids. She explained that she took on more than she could handle as a room parent for her daughter’s class at school.

But between work and other obligations, it as a task she wasn’t necessarily up for, even if it would make her daughter happy. In the end, she learned through the experience that it’s okay to say no to something if it means maintaining your own sanity as a parent.

9. FOLLOW YOUR INSTINCTS

As a mom, Busy tries to make it a point to raise her daughters how she sees fit rather than follow someone else’s plan or live by one solid set of rules. According to Busy, you should do what is right for your own family, since what works for one child may not necessarily work for another.

Other parents can learn from this rule so they aren’t continually comparing themselves to others or comparing their children to other kids. Doing so can be easy and it can be a slippery slope of sorts, but one of Busy’s parenting rules means making your own path.

8. MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF

As any parent knows, it can be difficult to juggle your own personal needs and wants and those of your kids. Busy makes it a rule, however, to make time for herself when she needs it.

In 2014, she told Huff Post that it’s important to find a balance that works for everyone. She said that it can be easy to feel guilty when it comes to your kids, but taking the time to do something for yourself will also benefit them in the long run.

7. DON’T BE AFRAID TO ADMIT YOU CAN’T DO SOMETHING

Being a parent can sometimes mean trying to do it all. But if you have a partner, Busy recommends leaning on them whenever you can. She also spoke to Parents about doing just that when it came to dealing with one of her daughter’s sleeping issues.

She said that trying to handle it in between struggling to get sleep herself and working a full-time job was taxing on her. She then recognized that it was okay to step aside and let her husband handle the issue so she wouldn’t have to.

6. UNPLUG IF YOU CAN

Busy also understands the value in stepping back from technology whenever you can and the same goes for encouraging your kids to do it. She believes that doing something more hands-on can engage children in a more organic way, especially if you are willing to do it with them.

So instead of just urging your kids to set down the iPad, you should take your own advice and do the same. It may be easier said than done every single day, but setting aside some time each week for unplugging as a family can be a way to reconnect with your kids.

5. RECOGNIZE THAT YOUR PARTNERSHIP SHOULD BE EQUAL

If you’re a single parent but also co-parent with your child’s other parents, it’s important to maintain a healthy relationship. And if, like Busy, you have a dedicated partner by your side, it is equally as important. And in a 2019 interview with Harper’s Bazaar, she admitted that she considered leaving her husband for not being an equal partner as the father of her children.

And whether or not you have ever had the urge to potentially leave your partner over a similar situation, it’s important to recognize that to be successful parents together, it has to be an equal partnership.

4. DON’T GIVE INTO THE WINE PEER PRESSURE

These days, it’s a common thing for moms to lean on each other over wine nights out. It’s a subculture all on its own and has given birth to plenty of funny internet memes and social media posts.

But Busy makes it a rule to keep the wine out of parenting, even if some other moms use it to get through the harder parts of dealing with their kids. Whether other moms say they use wine as more of a joke or not, Busy recommends keeping a clear head whenever possible when dealing with kids.

3. REMEMBER THAT YOU AREN’T ABOVE GETTING YOUR HANDS DIRTY

Despite being a successful actress who keeps busy with plenty of projects, Busy is also a very hands-on sort of mom. In October, she posted on Instagram about helping her daughter put together a homemade robot costume.

These days, that sort of dedication is hard to come by from busy parents, let alone one like Busy herself, who has plenty going on in all aspects of her career. No one expects you to be a super parent, but don’t assume you are too good to roll up your sleeves and get your hands dirty for the sake of your kids.

2. KEEP YOUR KIDS BUSY IF YOU CAN

Shortly before Busy released her memoir, she spoke to The Hollywood Reporter about juggling parenthood with work and the challenge of keeping her daughters busy and active during the summer in the middle of it all.

She said she tries to keep them busy in a useful way that doesn’t overexert them, but can fill some time during the off months from school. And, as to be expected, her rules for keeping kids busy involve shying away from screen time whenever possible.

1. MAKE TIME FOR YOUR CAREER

Throughout having two children and maintaining her marriage for more than 10 years, Busy has managed to find the time to have it all. Not only has she made it a point to be there for her daughters, but she has also managed to have a full career. She is now an author, but she is also an actress and spokesperson for various brands, from Old Navy to Red Baron pizza. She proves how important it is to make time for your career as a parent, even if you aren’t a well-known celebrity like she is.

In 2018, Busy released her memoir, This Will Only Hurt a Little, in which she delves into her parenting style, career, and everything in between. Maybe her parenting style isn’t exactly what you plan to follow as a parent yourself, but she has been around the block and proves that she can make her own path for what works for her as a mom.

Originally published on Moms.

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