Over the past few years I have learnt, more than ever, that it is okay not to have it all together all the time. I ran into a friend of mine the other day and we had a good talk, he is one of those guys who is completely genuine, and really cares about people. Just a genuine, sincere person. When we started talking and he asked me how life was, how I am doing and so forth, it wasn’t to pry into my business. He really wanted to know how my physical and mental wellbeing was.
He understood.
He understood how fickle life can be. One minute your riding high on the joys of life, the next minute you’re tired and dejected body is being crushed by the waves of life.
The truth is, life just plain sucks sometimes and things aren’t always okay. I know I’m not the only the one that feels that way, it’s a fact of life. The truth is though, we need to allow ourselves to experience our emotions and cut ourselves some slack. In a world where social media is rife, and everyone seems to have everything together, we need to remember that perception is not entirely reality and most importantly, we don’t have to have it all together all the time.
It made me think how many of us ever feel that they must have their life together 24/7? If you are struggling, do you feel that you must try harder and do better? I used to feel that way, but not anymore. With time, I’ve learnt that it’s perfectly fine not having it all together and you don’t have to either.
When people ask me how things are going blogging/career wise, sometimes I feel they expect a huge, epic update. Sometimes I do have fantastic news, other times though I don’t have an epic or huge update.
Things are the same.
Or, actually, things aren’t the same, I’m going through a few challenges.
Great.
And no, Im not giving up. I am just going through a rough patch now. You know why? Because im human, I’m fallible and life is never always going to go according to my plans. We all should know by now that life consists of a cycle of seasons. Some seasons will bring absolute bliss and joy, other seasons it will bring you to your knees and make you feel lost and disheartened.
Considering all that, it’s ok to struggle, it’s ok to not have any clue on where your journey will lead you. Society might make you feel that you need to have everything planned out, that you have to have it all together all the time but truth be told…you don’t. Sometimes the best things that happen to us come unplanned. Sometimes the best things that happen to us come at a time when we are lost and confused. Don’t place any unnecessary pressure or unrealistic expectations on yourself to have it together, all the time. It will only make you feel worse.
Life is going to get hard at times. We will, inevitably, face troubling times but even during our struggles, we need to have some faith and believe that whatever is happening to us is there to shape us and mould us into the person we are meant to become.
Let’s stop being so hard on ourselves and start showing ourselves some grace.
The first step is to put your mask of perfection down and admit that you struggle. Admit that life, at times, does suck! We’re far from perfect and far be it from anyone of us to pass any judgement. The silver lining is that if you are at this point in your life where things are falling apart instead of coming together, take a deep breath and trust that this experience is part of your story unfolding.