One of the toughest things about being a human is dealing with negative emotions. Sometimes they come up when we’re stressed or hurt, and it’s hard to know what to do: should you stuff your anger away? Or risk making things worse by saying something wrong? As it turns out, neither option works well for our health!
You can’t just suppress your feelings indefinitely. Eventually, that frustration will find its way back into the conversation whether you want them there or not. And even if someone doesn’t call us on how mad we are at them specifically (or themselves!), then those pent-up frustrations tend to leak all over their surroundings, too, consequently causing people around us more harm than good in general.
Dealing with Negative Emotions
Even though most of us have been taught this, many of us approach our negative emotions in the wrong way anyway. We start feeling frustrated or hurt, so we try to push those feelings away and act like we feel nothing; only then do we find ourselves constantly dwelling on what someone did wrong (instead of what’s going right for us), which can make it very hard to stop thinking about how much that other person actually upset you and moved you out of your comfort zone.
And no matter how many times you tell yourself that “it’s not my problem” and “I shouldn’t be bothered by this”, your mind doesn’t listen – it has its own logic. When things are bothering us, it’ll work to remind us of them until we finally do something about whatever’s got us upset.
Understanding Your Emotions
The best way to deal with negative emotions is to understand exactly what you’re feeling and why: when you do this, it makes it easier to find healthy ways of dealing with your frustrations without hurting yourself or the people around you. For example, when I get angry at my friends for making plans they won’t stick to, I know that even though my frustration sometimes makes me act like I’m caring more about punctuality than having time together – in reality, I really want both!
It just so happens that my feelings are frustrating me right now. So instead of confronting them as if my hurt feelings were an actual problem (when they aren’t) and trying to force myself into a better mood by getting further upset, I remind myself of all the times that we have been able to be on time for our activities and plan out what we can do instead of forcing them to change their plans just because I’m frustrated.
What can you change
If you’ve wondered what to do with these feelings, however, you are not alone in struggling with negative emotions. Many people have the same question about stress and coping. Some even go to luxury rehabs if they feel they feel that they cannot solve their issues alone. When they feel overcome with negative emotions like hurt, frustration, or anger, they know they shouldn’t pretend they feel anything. Still, they also don’t want to dwell on negative feelings and ruminate.
But while most of us have heard that these are not healthy strategies for stress relief, what other options are there? By knowing more about how your mind works when it comes to dealing with stress, as well as several additional ways of the problem-solving outside of just pushing those feelings away (or getting angry at yourself), then you’ll be able to make more informed decisions about how to approach and handle your negative feelings, instead of just reacting without really thinking first.
Compassionate Coping
One of the best ways to deal with negative emotions involves looking at them from a different angle and treating yourself like someone you truly care about. When you have empathy for how you must be feeling, it becomes easier to remember that even though those negative feelings are not enjoyable at the moment, they’ll pass one day and be worth nothing more than an interesting story about what made us feel most upset. By knowing this ahead of time, though, we can make better choices, decisions based on what we want instead of reacting out of frustration or anger.
Conclusion
Negative emotions can make us feel like we’re coming apart at the seams, but all of our frustrations are just signs that tell us what’s truly important to us. By understanding how they work and reminding ourselves of the love we have for those friends or family members driving us crazy, then we’ll be able to deal with stress in a healthy, helpful way.