It takes courage to speak your truth. Wanting to be a people-pleaser is totally natural; everyone wants to be liked and accepted. Women especially are presented with unique challenges on their way to voicing their opinions and being heard. But in the end, keeping your emotions bottled up can result in shame and guilt.
Unfortunately, it’s easy to hide how we feel from others. And sometimes it’s just as easy to suppress how we feel to ourselves. This often leads women to try to control how they feel rather than expressing how they feel to others — whether that be to their friends, family, health professional or significant other.
Withdrawing and shielding yourself from ridicule by silencing yourself is a normal compulsion. It keeps us safe from criticism and serves as an effective coping mechanism against disapproval. We all do it. But the long-term damage this can have on you on a spiritual level far outweighs the unpleasantness of being honest and having your perspective be rejected.
You’re not responsible for gaining the acceptance or approval of others
One of the most important breakthroughs that many women experience — especially during their pregnancy journey — is the realization that you don’t need anything outside of yourself to attain satisfaction and inner-peace. You don’t need need to safeguard yourself from criticism by censoring yourself. In the end, having the in boldness to speak your truth can bring about benefits you may have never considered.
Reaching your goals is only possible through honesty. Some of the greatest female leaders in history (and of today) were and continue to be so impactful to society because they bravely spoke their truths. Leaders and activists like Susan B. Anthony, Harriet Tubman, Mary Wollstonecraft, Gloria Steinem, Malala Yousafzai and so many others helped shape history for the better through honesty and fearlessness.
“Speaking your truth, even though it might create conflict or tension,” advises author and personal growth adviser Barbara De Angelis. “Behaving in ways that are in harmony with your personal values. Making choices based on what you believe, and not what others believe.”
But what exactly does that have to do with fertility and pregnancy?
Fertility is all about flow. But not speaking your truth is hiding your true self, which is a form of emotional blocking. Keeping how you feel to yourself and keeping a fake positive mask can hold you back emotionally, socially and spiritually. Withdrawing and suppressing your emotions can have a deeply negative impact on your relationship and your decision-making. You can be taken advantage of by others and have your ideas and opinions devalued.
Holding back from speaking your truth relates to fertility, because when we block or suppress these emotions or judging ourselves for our own emotions, we let that energy get stuck in our system. Especially those especially uncomfortable feelings that can be difficult to address can lead to emotional blockage. Having those tough conversations is necessary.
The toxic energy that has kept you from speaking your truth is the result of you giving your own power and agency over your life to others. Only when you begin to speak your truth unapologetically can you begin to break away from those behavioral patterns that are ingrained in your mind. Then you can begin to either address or turn the volume down on the inner critic that tells you that you’re unworthy.
Recognizing that you need to begin speaking your truth is the toughest step. But it’s important to begin as soon as possible. The longer you wait to begin speaking your truth, the more time you spend suffering. Once you begin addressing these emotions, you’ll be on the path to recovery and healing.
That’s not to say that speaking your truth won’t lead to uncomfortable emotions or reactions from others. But that can often be a good sign that you’re on the right track. That means you’re coming out of hiding and that you are willing to honor who you really are. In the end, speaking your truth results in building many of the same skills that will be necessary for motherhood — and prepare you for passing along that same emotional intelligence to your children.
Originally published at medium.com