A personal brand is personal — being pushed at all levels to reveal myself was really challenging. There is a lot to be said about having to reveal yourself to your family, friends and the public like I never had before. That’s where you have to decide if you are strong enough to overcome the opinions of others and continue to be the brand that will change other people’s lives.
Many successful people reinvented themselves in a later period in their life. Jeff Bezos worked in Wall Street before he reinvented himself and started Amazon. Sara Blakely sold office supplies before she started Spanx. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson was a WWE wrestler before he became a successful actor and filmmaker. Arnold Schwarzenegger went from a bodybuilder, to an actor to a Governor. McDonald’s founder Ray Croc was a milkshake-device salesman before starting the McDonalds franchise in his 50’s.
How does one reinvent themselves? What hurdles have to be overcome to take life in a new direction? How do you overcome those challenges? How do you ignore the naysayers? How do you push through the paralysing fear?
In this series called “Second Chapters; How I Reinvented Myself In The Second Chapter Of My Life “ we are interviewing successful people who reinvented themselves in a second chapter in life, to share their story and help empower others.
As a part of this interview series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Nicole Rosenfield.
The difficult balance between a successful corporate career and family life led Nicole Rosenfield to significant change after her first child. Nicole transitioned from corporate and healed her 29 year addiction to dieting and binge eating to create her own business helping women overcome their thoughts that have kept them trapped, overweight and action-less so they can develop the self esteem to dream again.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we start, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
I was Born in New Zealand and we lived a quieter life. I was surrounded in a bubble of friends and safe neighbourhoods to play freely in. I spent my days helping my parents, playing in the back yard and styling my barbie dolls. I was always immaculately dressed and extremely well mannered. My mother had various roles in customer service and my dad was away for a lot of my childhood traveling for work as a marine engineer. My parents gave me many opportunities to bloom. I was always different and had lots of innovative ideas but was scared to really be myself as I just wanted to fit in with the cool kids. When I was ten my sister was born, we were in and out of hospital for many years, my life changed and I experienced things that were difficult, I grew up very quickly. I loved fashion, hair, makeup and anything different to express myself. Music was a real outlet for me. I sang and played the flute and connected with new friends over music and alternative clothing choices. I got offered a hairdressing apprenticeship and left school early, I was never ‘deemed’ academic and hairdressing in the future would take me to places that I never imagined or thought were possible.
Can you please give us your favourite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
“You are your biggest advocate” There is absolutely no one in the world that can believe in you like you can. You are the one that can take charge, you are the only one who can take full radical responsibility for yourself. Stepping into complete clarity for where you are at and how you want your life to be. When I realized this and started embodying it my life took off to places I never thought were possible. What an opportunity we have in this life!
You have been blessed with much success. In your opinion, what are the top three qualities that you possess that have helped you accomplish so much? If you can, please share a story or example for each.
Tenacity — Always believing it’s going to happen, having the faith, trying new strategies and if they fail try again in a different way. Not giving up and remaining consistent in my actions to get to my success.
Bravery — Always going first and being a leader is testing. I left my comfortable corporate salary with bonuses to build my own empire. Leaving the comfort zone has allowed me to up skill in so different areas of my life personally and professionally. I am grateful that I took the chance to step up into my own business as this is the person who I was always meant to be. I remember wanting to take the chance so often but many years ago I never had the confidence or self belief.
Cutting my losses — Recognizing that if something is not working out, work through it and move forward to the next idea. There is nothing wrong with trying a different way to get a better result (even after doing the hard work, investments and time involved), maybe it’s the direction you were looking for all along.
Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion about ‘Second Chapters’. Can you tell our readers about your career experience before your Second Chapter?
I was a qualified hairdresser at the age of twenty-one. I traveled the world and used my trade to help me facilitate an incredible lifestyle. Always ambitious and taking myself out of my comfort zone, I moved to Melbourne Australia where my corporate career began in the world’s largest beauty company. Starting in education and then extending into business development working one on one with business owners and their teams to coach and guide them in their businesses with sales through education, I got excited by public speaking and mindset work and these are still my passions today.
And how did you “reinvent yourself” in your Second Chapter?
I left my corporate career after maternity leave. I was working on myself with personal development and private coaching during my leave and knew that there was another way to make an income on my own terms and have success whilst being present with my child. My true passion became evident after I went through a major life change (overcoming an eating disorder) which catapulted me into helping other women see their greatness and to not give up on themselves. I lost my identity after having my baby, I grieved my career. It took me approximately a year to align myself to understand what I wanted and to learn who I was becoming. There were so many facets that I had to face about myself and my journey to heal my eating disorder was the significant moment in my reinvention.
Can you tell us about the specific trigger that made you decide that you were going to “take the plunge” and make your huge transition?
I was 14 months postpartum, I was gaining weight rapidly and not losing it. This was a problem that had me in deep avoidance. I was so lost and didn’t know myself anymore — I went from wearing leather pencil skirts, red lips and stilettos being so busy and highly involved with businesses to being a mum who was seen in active wear and no makeup who secretly lost herself in the facade that I was living my best life. My past identity no longer fit in with my new narrative, my purpose as a mum was fulfilled and I was so in love with our little family but I was really unhappy within myself and eating my feelings. Finding myself being repulsed by dieting (I had repeated the same patterns since I was eleven years old) and was binge eating to numb out my pain then riddling myself full of the guilt and shame making sure I was completely action less.Hitting rock bottom I knew things had to change in my mind and body and be the strong role model for my son that he deserved and showing women globally how to step into their own power.
What did you do to discover that you had a new skill set inside of you that you haven’t been maximizing? How did you find that and how did you ultimately overcome the barriers to help manifest those powers?
I had been coaching individuals and business owners for years to me this was not a new concept. The life lessons that were acquired and learned through my experiences with my weight, yo-yo dieting, lack of self confidence and binge eating suddenly became a major game changer (my superpower). The more I worked through the concepts the more I felt excited. I overcame these barriers by exercising confidence and bravery. I had been showing up on social media, evolving and growing but never had the guts to say that I had overcome an eating disorder by myself and I truly understand how women can be their own worst enemy.I’m now a passionate Inner Critic Expert and making a positive change to the world and it gives me goosebumps.
How are things going with this new initiative? We would love to hear some specific examples or stories.
This is the most fulfilling, satisfying move I have ever made in my life. I have managed multiple million dollar territories but To help other women release themselves from their greatest fears and find themselves is the biggest rush and I love it.
Is there a particular person who you are grateful towards who helped get you to where you are? Can you share a story about that?
I started my journey with a mindset coach and remember having the conversation about how I wanted to lose weight desperately and I needed help to achieve this goal. Throughout the calls I remember two significant quotes “if you are ever going to achieve comfort in your own body you must first love yourself” This was something I didn’t want to hear as the pain was overwhelming, the actions and results I was getting were not of someone who had self respect or cared about their overall health and that comment has forever changed me.The second thing I remember I talked about how it was normal for me to snack all day and not eat a proper meal. “your son is watching everything you do, every time you snack he is going to expect to do the same — you are the example”. As simple as it sounds I got so triggered these words took the wind out of my sails and the tears welled up so much I couldn’t see anything on my zoom call anymore my journey of change and healing had begun. I am forever grateful for this woman and she is the reason why I am writing this article today.Without working with a coach I don’t know where I would be. Finding yourself is a process and it’s not for the faint hearted and I would do it again because it made me the person I am today.
Can you share the most interesting story that happened to you since you started in this new direction?
I have lost 61 pounds of unworthiness that I was carrying around for far too long. I was never diagnosed officially with binge eating disorder, my guilt and shame took over and I never told anyone but I knew I had an issue for years before I did anything about it. Everyone says how did you lose weight? Simply put, how do you tell someone that you gave yourself the greatest gift of self respect? It’s not about looking a specific way, it’s about loving yourself first and making sure that you put on your oxygen mask first. It’s more than a new clothing size or looking thin, It’s not about gaining approval anymore. When I started to lose weight people wanted to know my workout plan and what I ate. I felt really triggered as I deep down I was releasing myself from my own demons, stories and limiting beliefs — that is so much more than a number on a scale. An absolute triumph for someone who had fought for 29 years to feel worthy within herself.
Did you ever struggle with believing in yourself? If so, how did you overcome that limiting belief about yourself? Can you share a story or example?
I struggled with self belief. I had all the drive and passion but I still questioned myself on if I had what it took to have my own business. The Inner Critic and Imposter syndrome is not lost on any of us including myself. I was tested on so many levels, I was creating a personal brand and had to show up. I had to do things I didn’t want to do. Showing vulnerability and a side of myself that no-one had seen before, it was so scary. Letting comparison fall away, having less judgement on myself, dropping perfectionism and being seen were all part of the process.I let fear ride beside me, I had to keep telling myself that I was the one in control and making the decisions. I keep taking the leaps and keep the faith every single day.
In my own work I usually encourage my clients to ask for support before they embark on something new. How did you create your support system before you moved to your new chapter?
Being totally honest I have lost a lot of friends, everyone has their own journey and it’s really important that you have the right people around you that get what you are doing and why you are doing it. I had to up level constantly and be around people who were achieving things I wanted to do . I had to put myself in uncomfortable situations and I had a mentor that guided me at the start and then soon joined masterminds and group programs that have created a network of support for me that to this day I learn, grow and up skill surrounded by a super supportive inner circle.
Starting a new chapter usually means getting out of your comfort zone, how did you do that? Can you share a story or example of that?
Losing my identity as a new mother and not having the daily hustle was uncomfortable as I have always been a high achiever. I had to fight to find myself and see what was really going to have meaning to me. I wanted so badly to have my own business but I was so worried about putting myself out on social media it crippled me. No-one really understood what I was doing as I was finding my superpower as I went showing up and developing myself. It’s been a process of evolution, one of finding my new identity and my niche along the way to pave the way for others to show them that they can do it too. If there is another woman doing what you want to do you have evidence that you too can achieve.
Fantastic. Here is the main question of our interview. What are your “5 things I wish someone told me before I started leading my organization” and why? Please share a story or example for each.
- A personal brand is personal — being pushed at all levels to reveal myself was really challenging. There is a lot to be said about having to reveal yourself to your family, friends and the public like I never had before. That’s where you have to decide if you are strong enough to overcome the opinions of others and continue to be the brand that will change other people’s lives.
- Overwhelm in consumption — Learning and up-skilling is available to us in such a grand capacity now but there is something to be said for sitting in paralysis, in comparison and not getting ideas out and having the confidence to trust you are creating the dream you actually have to come to fruition.
- Moments of reflection will be sent to test you. There will be times where the inner critic and imposter syndrome will come in uninvited and unexpected. The loud voice of unreason telling you you’re hopeless, destined to fail, not good enough, not like others ect, the list goes on. Getting separation from such crippling negative stories will not only change your perspective, it will change your life.
- Hustle mentality can only last for so long, you have to have a direct and clear message about your why and how you are passionately changing people’s lives. Being busy all the time for the sake of it is a wasted resource, putting your energy and intention into what really matters will get you to your end goal.
- Radical responsibility in all areas of your life, not just business and it’s imperative to your mindset to succeed. Being honest with yourself about what is working and what is not. Dreams and manifestations are wonderful but action is priceless because you are the one who is responsible for the success of your company.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?
Firstly thank you! 1.5 Billion women a year give up on their dreams — To me personally this is a sad indication of how small the majority of women feel inside but would never vocalise it. Women take on roles in society, in their career, in their lives and they pretend they don’t want more to please others and just accept their current life — It’s hard to feel happy about an abundant future under these pretences. The coping mechanisms that women take on to make themselves small in the process is hindering their mental health and they hide from being seen. Women need to stand up and be proud of who they are, break through their thought processes and propel into the new version of themselves. Young girls start experiencing limiting beliefs at the age of five and four out of five adult women have low self esteem. Women have intentionally stopped dreaming to satisfy other people’s requirements from their lack of self worth. My movement is here to change that narrative.
We are very blessed that some very prominent names in Business, VC funding, Sports, and Entertainment read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch with, and why? He or she might just see this if we tag them 🙂
Kris Jenner — Kris manages the most influential personal brands in the world, I am intrigued how an ex flight attendant could create the most dominant globally recognized icons. How does one achieve such an empire in the public eye and behind the scenes?
How can our readers further follow your work online?
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
Thank you so much for this opportunity, I am so grateful to be part of this amazing series Second Chapters.