“Loving yourself is important because who you are, is important” with Kristin Marquet & Kori Raishon Galloway

Loving yourself is important because who you are, is important. We are all made differently. We are created to be unique experiences for each other. If we were raised to Love ourselves imagine the great experiences we would have with each other. Happiness evolving into joy creates a state of bliss for life which would […]

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Loving yourself is important because who you are, is important. We are all made differently. We are created to be unique experiences for each other. If we were raised to Love ourselves imagine the great experiences we would have with each other. Happiness evolving into joy creates a state of bliss for life which would be the vibrational energy that we all share. When we truly understand Love then all that we complain about would be limited.

As a part of my series about “Connecting With Yourself To Live With Better Relationships” I had the pleasure to interview, Kori Raishon Galloway also known as RaiVision on stage. Kori will tell you that his life is a spiritual journey. Knowing that his path is to share his inner thoughts about life and the meaning of Love with those seeking to expand their own quest for Being. As he grows on his walk, every day he seeks wisdom from his Higher Source and Creator of his existence. “I am blessed in my knowing”. His blessings come either through experiences of thought, or physical interactions with individuals that pass through his life on his journey towards higher learning. Kori Raishon is an empath, intuitive, and a creator. Kori Raison, as he is known in the business as the owner and conceptualist of Double EE Productions LLC, a multi-media marketing company that is now functioning as a social impact company leveraging love through entertaining and insightful media content. The company, also known as D’EE’P, has two divisions, PonderThis!, a love Lifestyle brand and DPVN, a video production and distribution arm dedicated to empowering the vibration of Love. After receiving a degree in Architecture from New York Institute of Technology, Kori worked for 16 years as an architect with the New York State Department of Parks and Recreation, renovating historic buildings, designing toll booths, and tile patterns for park facilities and overseeing new park facility projects. It was his knack for seeing the whole picture that later catapulted him into a far more creative career. As a multi-talented visionary and creative, he began working across the board in a variety of art and entertainment industries: graphic design, photography, writing, production management, and videography. Kori quickly became sought after by diverse start-up companies and independent business owners across the country because of an innate ability to move his clients from razor-sharp concepts to clear-cut execution. Kori now knows, it is his empathic gifts that allow him to see a person’s true light. “My gifts are many and I have learned to embrace them as an adult, as I did while I was in the innocent years of my childhood. I am still learning and hope to forever learn in this lifetime, to grow to gain the wisdom that I seek at the moment. What was a game to me as a child, now has a deeper meaning and a place for me now.” He is thankful for his life and for the ability to share his insight with others. “Life is a sequence of lessons that we draw to ourselves, and in every incidence, I am in awe of what I learn and know to be my truth”. Since January 2018, Kori Raishon has brought Double EE Productions, LLC into the thriving era of Love that is present today. His calling is to create a global vision for a Love-lifestyle brand using media as it’s a platform. PonderThis! creates a lifestyle that is making love to another level. We not only talk about Love, we entertain with love being the central theme of the music, poetry, films, and theater performances that we present. PonderThis! produces mini-concerts that encourage our guests to be their authentic selves by leaving their titles at the door. Once you enter the room you are no one’s sibling, spouse, or child. The only responsibility that our guests have is to be and allow themselves to flow. Kori Raishon Galloway is a single, heterosexual, transgender man. He is also a caregiver for three adults, as well as an award winner for community service and cooking. Most of all Kori is letting people know that he is an advocate for Love.

Thank you so much for joining us! Let’s Get Intimate! I’d love to begin by asking you to give us the backstory as to what brought you to this specific career path.

What brought me to my career path is my love for the arts.

I began taking pictures when I was younger. My father gave me his camera when I was 12 or 13. I also wrote poetry since the age of 15. Love poems, about women that I could not date because of the body I was in.

I knew I wanted to work in a creative field but had no idea what that entailed. So I asked my mother and she told me Architecture was a good career choice. While in college training to be an architect I found a group that put on plays and dance parties. I joined, and that is where I got my feet wet in writing plays, directing stage, and honed in on my photography skills. I also started managing talent. A few of my clients were alumni of the school while another was an employee. Those early experiences opened me to a new world of self-expression and I haven’t looked back since.

Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you hope that they might help people along their path to self-understanding or a better sense of wellbeing in their relationships?

Last year 2018 I started working on a new project that I truly believe is my calling. I am now my own client, after 23 years of being in the business working for others. I decided to finally use my gifts and talents for myself and promote self-love by starting with me. First I had to stop giving so much of myself away because it was leaving me depleted mentally, physically, and financially. I had to face the hard truth that I couldn’t do it all, all the time. My health suffered as a caregiver and I had to find a way back to a place of quiet to reconnect and fall in love with me again. The hiatus I took of self-discovery brought me back to a place of purity and peace from a time when life was simpler. Sometimes you have to be selfish before you can share yourself with others. The core of any good relationship is you, and I had to relearn that. I’m hoping that others take the time to put themselves first as the foundation for building a solid relationship with anyone they wish to connect with.

That beautiful experience brought me back to my passion project PonderThis! I have been writing PonderThis! since college. PonderThis! is a series based on thought-provoking questions or insightful questions that I would like others to ask themselves. Questions such as: What do you really know about who you are? How do you let the vibrations of others affect your well being?

I feel that we are not doing enough to expand Love or even acknowledge love as a vibration of who we are. Taking healing arts out of schools has created an imbalance in our society. I feel we need to bring back the basics and start the action of Love. I know that the arts can do just that.

Do you have a personal story that you can share with our readers about your struggles or successes along your journey of self-understanding and self-love? Was there ever a tipping point that triggered a change regarding your feelings of self-acceptance?

I was born female and labeled black in America in the late ’60s. That “black” label comes with a story of self-awareness and miseducation about who you really are. I was also born in the wrong body in a religious and conservative family. The combination of the two created a nice chaotic pie of thoughts, emotions, and tastes about life. At 17 I contemplated committing suicide. It was interrupted by a vision of my future god-son who would be born 10 years later.

Life was a place of silence for me. I had a mental running dialogue, an intense internal questioning of why me? I also had spiritual gifts that allowed me to see the world a little differently than most. I was gifted with the ability as an intuitive, empath, seer, and was able to astral project.

Being transgendered allowed me another gift as well, giving me the ability to understand being both genders. A duality of sorts, something that most men and women do not get to experience in their lifetime. I feel being who I am is a gift more than a curse. Energetically speaking, I feel that my life was meant to help others find their balance. We all are transgendered individuals via our gender energy.

The tipping point for me was when I could no longer live in a body that was not who I fully or truly was. I wanted the world to see me, as I see me. I wanted to visually balance my appearance with my thoughts and soul. Energetically I am male. My chromosome structure did not adhere to the heart and soul of me.

It was my ex-girlfriend of 6 years that told me that I was a man trapped in a woman’s body. She worked in the medical field, and at the time was an employee of what is now Callen-Lorde in New York City, the first LGBT focused health clinic.

I immediately looked into getting help. I made a formal announcement to my close friends at 32 years of age that I was committed to becoming my authentic self and all that it entailed. I was approved to get surgery after undergoing extensive physical and psychological evaluations, and boom I became what I am today, a man for the world to see.

It took six years to become the man that I wanted to be. I took personal steps in creating this black man. I did not want to be a created stereotype. So I went in again. Deeper into myself to take a closer look at who I really was. Throughout my life, I never had the opportunity to fully express myself. I had to study the heart of who I was, and develop a lost child while walking in this world as an adult. For me, that meant listening to my own voice, thoughts, and feelings. I wanted to be a man in America more than anything else. The question was then, what is a man? I would have to define myself in order to know. I molded and defined my inner essence. I created myself with care, not fearing what the world would think about me but becoming true to who I was.

I would advise that we all take the time to discover and develop self.

According to a recent study cited in Cosmopolitan, in the US, only about 28 percent of men and 26 percent of women are “very satisfied with their appearance.” Could you talk about what some of the causes might be, as well as the consequences?

I feel that the societal-media creates personal chaos that most feel when it comes to self-love. I was on the subway in New York City one time and the verbiage in the ad and image of beauty was a white woman. The Verbiage was “This Is Beauty”. I said to myself in looking at that ad that, “we all cannot be white. We all cannot be women”. I think the controlled media is fearful to see all of life as beauty. It is changing now because we have more independent media coming out with a voice that we all can listen to, grow from, and expand.

My maternal grandfather said, “There is only one race, the human race.” and I bought into that knowing. So many people are hurting because of the miseducation of self-love. We are taught to be something we are not in order to fit into a diverse world of thought and experiences. It is ironic that we seek outside of ourselves to be ourselves!

Most are seeking Love, and no one starts with self-love. When you start with self-love you will find the Love that you are looking for, a place where you are whole and discover self-acceptance.

The consequences of not going in to find the love that we seek has created the world that we see. The altering of our looks through the advancement of medical surgeries, pills, and diets. We have not understood that our uniqueness is a powerful aspect to who we are as an individual.

As cheesy as it might sound to truly understand and “love yourself,” can you share with our readers a few reasons why it’s so important?

Loving yourself is important because who you are, is important. We are all made differently. We are created to be unique experiences for each other. If we were raised to Love ourselves imagine the great experiences we would have with each other. Happiness evolving into joy creates a state of bliss for life which would be the vibrational energy that we all share. When we truly understand Love then all that we complain about would be limited.

Why do you think people stay in mediocre relationships? What advice would you give to our readers regarding this?

People stay in mediocre relationships because they have not been taught that love is internal. Most seek Love. They go from one person to another hoping to find their treasured love in others. Their understanding of love has been fostered in thinking it is a feeling. They think that feelings are evoked by others instead of feelings being an awareness of checks and balances that keep you in alignment.

Love is not a feeling, but a vibration that is interpreted into emotions based on your experiences from childhood. Your childhood holds thoughts that were translated into emotions. These thoughts were either aligned, not aligned, or misaligned with who you are. For this reason, we tend to think this is either our normal or it is all that we are worthy of.

Our spiritual sense never changes. As adults, we are in search of our original selves. In that search, most have been told the following: to seek love in that man or woman, that marriage is the key to happiness, and that serving others will bring you joy. What was missing in these teachings is that you, with a capital Y, bring yourself joy. You must know yourself enough to know your wants in order to have the relationship you deserve.

When I talk about self-love and understanding I don’t necessarily mean blindly loving and accepting ourselves the way we are. Many times self-understanding requires us to reflect and ask ourselves the tough questions, to realize perhaps where we need to make changes in ourselves to be better not only for ourselves but for our relationships. What are some of those tough questions that will cut through the safe space of comfort we like to maintain, that our readers might want to ask themselves? Can you share an example of a time that you had to reflect and realize how you needed to make changes?

Asking the tough questions that cut through the safe space of comfort we like to maintain, is a requirement that really must be met in order to find ourselves.People have to start with What am I? In asking what they are the next question is What are your likes and dislikes about who you are? Then breaking those questions down into Who am I? will bring you closer to clarity. The definition of knowing why you are brings you to the core of your existence.

There will be history, and voices from those that raised you, and the society that nurtured you that will come up in your self-questioning. This is where you begin to determine what you own or don’t own about who and what you are.

I have been asking myself why for a very long time by engaging in self-examination to find my true identity. When I was four, I asked my mother one day what a girl was because I was comparing my body to my brother’s, who was streaking around the house at the time. Her answer was very vague. She stated, “You are like me”. Still, I did not understand what that was, “Like me”. Feeling like a boy I was being called a girl, this makes a child question their existence. The feeling that I felt that day was if adults could not define their gender definitively to a 4-year-old, “Then who am I?” and “Where do I fit in this world?” From that point in my young life, the search began. The search of knowing why we are brings you to a level of learning to love yourself despite what the world presents. It is a journey we are all on. How do I live in a world of boxes and become my authentic self?

So many don’t really know how to be alone or are afraid of it. How important is it for us to have, and practice, that capacity to truly be with ourselves and be alone (literally or metaphorically)?

Being alone at times is a major key to opening up to ourselves. One that is self-defined means, “a person’s essential being that distinguishes them from others, especially considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action”. Even when we talk about ourselves do we really inner-stand what we are describing.

Most individuals have been taught to think of others as stimulation for self-pleasure or Love. External stimulation instead of self-stimulation has been forced upon us in many ways. Even if we go south with that thought, masturbation was deemed to be shameful or sinful for many people. Our bodies and loving ourselves is selfish. My question is, is it really selfish or shameful when loving self should be all of who we are?

The person that can be alone holds a very powerful position of getting to know themselves. In that alone time, we can connect to truth. That connection will bring wisdom that we could never get from the world we live in.

How does achieving a certain level of self-understanding and self-love then affect your ability to connect with and deepen your relationships with others?

Achieving a certain level of self-understanding and self-love could empower our relationships. Bringing people into a place of beautiful communication, whether that communication is silence or with words. Self-understanding would allow for two individuals to really get to know each other. With the full understanding of self, in the midst of a crisis one would be able to express his or her needs in an effort to have them met by their partner.

One of my best experiences coming from couples counseling with the ex-girlfriend of 6 years was to spend a weekend in silence. I came out of that with a better understanding of her. I was able to observe her and see her without words interfering, and see her through my emotions. It also brought down my ego. It allowed me to see her and most of all myself. It was a beautiful experience that I ask from every woman that I am dating, though only a few have had that experience with me.

Relationship is a reflection of where we are in our lives. Getting to know ourselves through others is somewhat like being alone with yourself. We get to execute our self-knowing to see if we are utilizing our introspective knowledge of who we are at each level. With each new individual or the one that we have partnered with for life, we should be leveling-up. Every encounter should be a new challenge.

There should be an appreciation for the maturity that is reached as we see clearer into ourselves. Not relying on others to be the tools to fix the chipped glass that resides in the human frame of who and what we are. This state/level of independence creates a space to repair ourselves and celebrate the evolution.

In your experience, what should a) individuals and b) society, do to help people better understand themselves and accept themselves?

As individuals to better accept ourselves, I feel that we should date ourselves more. Go out to the movies, to the park, commune with nature more, meditate more. Function from a place of non-ownership. Meaning, remove the titles. Remove for a moment in your day the titles of mom and dad, sister or brother, husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, and even being the son or daughter of a parent or parents. The titles that we have may create a stain, that may, in essence, create our inability to love ourselves and others. Those titles come with rules and regulations, behavioral patterns, and more depending on the culture.

As a society, to better understand and accept individuals would be to experience people outside of your community, church, and culture. Celebrating all life in its entirety. Giving equal opportunities to all. Working towards building a utopia and removing judgmental stereotypes centered around the differences. Society could do something beautiful and outside of the box like create holidays that join us together based on similarities. The use of media to highlight these cultural connections could be the key to awakening the mind to remove judgments.

Travel encourages wisdom. Having our children travel to different countries through media would bring a better understanding of us being more alike. Knowing that our concerns are the same allows us to see that we are ok in who we are and what we are thinking. When you feel that you are alone you find yourself lonely. It is amazing to me, to see so many people that fear their surroundings. There are people that will not explore outside their neighborhoods. Some people have never left the state or in some cases their borough. If it is not finances holding them back, I have wondered if they fear that their taught truths are actually wrong?

We judge far too much and hate what we have not experienced. There is something wrong with that in my opinion, as hate creates the self-hate. If you are judging someone, in turn, you are judging you. If you are hating someone, then you are hating you. If you are judging or hating anyone, you are judging and hating God, since we all are its creation. It would be like the lemon tree hating the lemon it made or the lemonade.

What are 5 strategies that you implement to maintain your connection with and love for yourself, that our readers might learn from? Could you please give a story or example for each?

What I do to maintain self-love is to be thankful for all that is. When I feel down about something or get that voice of unworthiness, I become thankful for all that I have. When I get lost in my ego I seek friends that know me well and call on them to get me out of the rabbit hole of emotions and talk me back into my knowing. From there I process the situation and learn from that experience.

Some of the strategies that I also use to stay balanced in life, are to go within and question my thoughts. I search for the core of where that voice may have come from. I do not question why it happened, but I do question the emotions that were created because of the situation. I recognize the situation and allow it to pass. I forgive the past, look at the lesson that I could learn from it and move forward with the new information that is a part of me.

Another strategy is to look at myself from within and remember my mother saying, “ God will not give you something you can not handle”. I also recognize the Source within me and remember from whence I came. Knowing that the All is literally All, and I am a part of that which the higher power has created. When I recognize who I am it empowers me to know that what my mother taught me is true. It strengthens my faith in who I am as a Spiritual being.

Get rid of the negative feelings. I suggest removing yourself from negative people, friends, family, and things. Love does not live in negativity. We know that we are all on a journey. We don’t have to be part of an experience that does not enable us to grow. You can be cordial and respectful to those you are walking away from. Do not engage, and let them disappear as you open yourself to better circumstances. You don’t have to engage in the drama of another individuals path. As adults, we should lead ourselves on a journey, and at all times recognize our feelings so that we learn to choose loving experiences that empower who we are. In the long-run negative events will jeopardize our health.

My extended family had accused me of some untruths at a family Thanksgiving. It rocked me to my core. The energy that I felt was not Love, as I know or want it to be. The negativity I felt was destructive and allowed me to say goodbye with ease because I could not tolerate the type of behavior that was presented to me. I have grown enough to say no to experiences that do not serve me well. I am working on living in faith, knowing that I will be taken care of in a way that serves my highest and greatest good.

My newest path is living the Allowing Lifestyle which is playing a huge part in my life. I would suggest that people build themselves up to this level of faith. It is a life where you know that the most powerful time in your life is now. You hold on to nothing but the moment. Living in the present allows you to be present. Show up knowing that your time is current and that current is alive and well. Looking at your life in this way asks you to show up for you. It steers you to question, and then choose based on your current state of emotions. You must tap into knowing what you are, and what you like, and what pleases you based on that initial emotion.

A combination of all that I wrote above, will allow you to stay aligned with who you are or who you are becoming. Give yourself permission to block out all the distractions and allow yourself to just be.

What are your favorite books, podcasts, or resources for self-psychology, intimacy, or relationships? What do you love about each one and how does it resonate with you?

I follow and learn or align with many great masters in spiritual and physical sciences. The book that got me seriously on the road towards self riches was Deepak Chopra’s book Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire: Harnessing the Infinite Power of Coincidence. The aspect of being thankful was real for me. That is when I experienced my power.

I have read, Ask and It Is Given by Esther and Jerry Hicks inspired by Abraham. This book along with Conversations With God by Neale Donald Walsch allowed me to feel like I was not alone in the world with my knowledge. There were other people in the world with the same information and wisdom.

I love to follow YouTubers Jessica of Bahati Life, Sadhguru, Alan Watts, Eckhart Tolle, Bryan Katie, and Victor Otto, along with insightful video documentaries about Einstein’s theory. I also follow Your Youniverse, Santos Bonacci and others that are teachers of open-minded science. I am a Spiritual person and I know this. In this human body, I am more than how society views me. The list of spiritual beings that I follow, positions me in a community of like-minded individuals.

I also love to learn from others, people in my community that share a similar insight or higher learning. I have an open mind and heart for various thoughts and lifestyles. It works with me learning to get out of my mind’s thoughts and build a more unconditional Love. The world is round for a reason. No beginning and no end. Life will forever evolve and I enjoy the experience of it all.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? Maybe we’ll inspire our readers to start it…

If I could inspire a movement that would bring the most good, to the largest number of people, it would be what I am doing now. I am creating a Love-Lifestyle movement called PonderThis!. Double EE Productions, LLC is the parent company and through this division, we have become a social impact company specializing in media content to distribute our movement.

Through PonderThis! I am looking to leverage self-Love. I want people to start looking at themselves and to enjoy loving experiences. I know that art heals. Art changes lives, inspires individuals to move. PonderThis! is building the conversation and the experiences with art in mind. This is a part of that utopia of thought I was talking about. Everything imagined can be realized if we understood the power of the pure heart.

PonderThis! is offering individuals the opportunity to choose to vibrate in Love. Through our podcasts and our events, we offer men and women of all ages, genders, and creeds the opportunity to participate whether from their home or at the venue that we are at.

This would be that auspicious time to gather people that you love and to join us in the movement. I would love to see people who are awake in this era of change start a movement. We should grow Love like religious sects. As long as it is pure love that we are spreading and not the miseducated or superficial love that we are experiencing presently. In doing so we will see a better world all around.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote” that you use to guide yourself by? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life and how our readers might learn to live by it in theirs?

This year I am working with a quote that came to me in meditation, “Love has no name”. Later that same morning, that quote was confirmed via a video that I was watching during my listening studies. Love as the Bible describes holds no judgment, it is kind and sees not beyond itself. In my book, Love is all and you are Love, literally. Everything in this world is made from love. Love is a verb and a vibration that is motion. It is not divided. Once we give Love a name we have pulled it from its existence.

The quote is relevant to me in a way that speaks to my heart because it is a reminder that I am One with the universe. If we all could see beyond the physical and look directly into the soul or through the eyes of an individual, then we could recognize our reflection. We could hear better, feel better, and interact better in a way that brings care and kindness to the world. Empathy could reign as part of our everyday existence and not only when tragedy strikes. We should practice acts of kindness daily not just when winter holidays come around. If love is abundant imagine what self-love could bring.

Thank you so much for your time and for your inspiring insights!

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