I remember like it was yesterday. The day I figured out … A few years back I had just really started to hit my stride at my job. Then they changed my boss. Then two months later they changed who I would report to again. And the whole time sales were going up and business was good. Then new-new boss wanted me to change focus, and sell to different clients, basically to switch divisions. I didn’t agree. It also felt like a demotion.
I guess I wasn’t humble enough; I guess I didn’t consider how good I had it. But I knew that I wasn’t supposed to do THAT… So I talked to some mentors, I read more books, I looked at options, I started to evaluate everything.
Finally, I joined a mentor and started to help build his business. It was going well, yet I felt It could never be my main business. So I tried something else. It didn’t work. Then I tried something else, failed. And tried again. I NEEDED to figure out what I was supposed to do.
Supposed to do? What does that even mean?
We all have things we are supposed to do. Yet, too often we search for them and never figure it out. It is shame. Not knowing our purpose can cause anxiety. Not knowing what to do can cause anxiety.
Yet, once you figure it out, everything makes more sense, and you know. If you stop trying though, you will never know.
When you figure out your purpose, the next step is to figure out how to get there. It was a great day, the day I figured out that in order to do anything I am supposed to do, I better learn to write.
We should all be able to figure it out, you can figure it out.
One way to figure it all out is to write and to keep writing and then take action. Writing and doing (taking actions) are the two things that helped me get on the right path and will help you too.
When someone says something, they usually have a reason. The reason is usually a story. When someone writes something, they usually have a reason. The reason is usually a story. Stories are how we define our lives and give meaning to our experiences.
To really get to know someone, you need to understand the story behind the face, the story that creates the actions and thoughts.
Sometimes telling our story is difficult. That is why writing it down needs to become a habit. When we tell our stories we heal and we learn. We learn to appreciate and understand. We read what other people write, we can learn to appreciate them as well.
Your story (experience, ability) combined with your wants and aligned with your values is how you can find your purpose.
Because of an article written by Glenn Leibowitz, I challenged myself to write and publish something every sing day for 2017. 11 months later I am still on track.
It has been a wonderfully eye-opening experience. And not as difficult as I thought it would be. Each day I asked myself 1 question:
What lesson did I learn today?
Here is what my stories and November taught me:
Nov.1, 2017 – Shining Light
Hiding in the darkness only lasts so long. Eventually, the sun comes out and every corner is exposed. Rather than risk the pain, find ways to always be immersed in the light as much as possible for as long as possible. Do good. Be good. Help others. Shine your light for them.
Nov.2, 2017 – Find Your Strength
When we feel helpless we don’t act. We should. When the panic and worry becomes too strong, we shut down. We should turn on. The way to overcome anxiety is to do exactly what you are MOST AFRAID to do. Maybe not all at once, but little by little, step in the direction of your fear, embrace the unknown, and that is when you will find your strength.
Nov.3, 2017 – Relationships Determine Happiness
Relationships drive ALL happiness. Your relationship with yourself. Your relationship with your family. Your relationship with colleagues. Your relationship with God. It doesn’t matter. Whatever or whoever the relationship is with, the better the relationship the happier you WILL BE.
Nov.4, 2017 – Killing the Power
There are two types of power: power EARNED and power FORCED. One last forever, the other dies as soon as those without power figure out a way to kill it.
Nov.5, 2017 – Ready for Spring
Just because we can’t see it now, doesn’t mean it was never there. Spring is always just around the corner. Do not let the current situation prevent you from preparing for your spring that you know is coming. Because that is the truth: your spring will come. Will you be ready though?
Nov.6, 2017 – Skills Shared = Better Life
Skills are to be developed. Don’t waste your talent. Let other’s benefit by seeing you succeed. Let others feel and see your success. When we share our skills we improve our lives and we improve the people around us. We let others see beauty in action and can inspire them to succeed while affirming faith in our ability.
Nov.7, 2017 – Search For It
The only thing worth searching for is the good. If the bad comes, let it come and then let it go. Search and hold onto the good. Control your destiny by focusing only on what can actually help you succeed. Your true life depends on it.
Nov.8, 2017 – Never Too Late – Decide Now
It is never too late to change. Change starts with a decision that drives new action. Make the change by deciding and acting. In order to figure out what we need to change into, make sure all of your wants and actions are aligned. If they are, then your fulfillment will be made sure.
Nov.9, 2017 – Getting Offended
The more deeply you know someone, the better you will be at treating them the way they need to be treated.
If you can remember the last time you were offended, you get offended too easily. It is the same with feeling insulted. If you get offended, it is your fault. You can have an instant emotional response to everything, but the act of feeling (long-term emotions) offended or insulted is a choice. Getting offended means you place your ego above your true value. The problem is, everyone gets offended. The good thing is, we all have intrinsic worth and we can all remember to focus on others rather than ourselves, and that is how we reduce our own ability to get offended. Additionally, we can all help others get offended less by focusing on how they would feel in reaction to our words.
If you offend or insult someone, apologize and correct the mistake. If someone “offends” you, do not dwell on it and look beyond on your inner ego to your true worth and the true worth of every human.
Focus on what you can control. Focus on your actions and your responses to the actions of others.
Nov.10, 2017 – Your Window
Windows protect. Windows also allow perspective and vision. Windows can hold us back or can be the way to see the future. Do not hide behind the windows of opportunity.
Nov.11, 2017 – Remembering Those Who Help You
Remembering comes first, then appreciation can follow, and finally, gratitude should be the final result. Remember those who have helped you, those who sacrificed, those who served. Appreciate their efforts and then show gratitude. Thank the people in your life who matter. When you thank someone, the relationship grows stronger. You help them, they feel your care and they feel valued.
Nov.12, 2017 – Keep Control
When we accept everything life gives us, we feel better, we feel in control. We lose control when we try to change what we cannot. We control our actions and thoughts, we do not control others.
Nov.13, 2017 – Your Perfect World
The sun is not brighter just because you see it differently. Your perfect world is just that: yours. Don’t force a sea lion to live in the mountains. Don’t force a mountain lion to live in a jungle. Don’t force the ideas of others on yourself. Don’t force your perfect world on the world of others.
Nov.14, 2017 – Standing Alone
Standing alone does not mean you need to be lonely. You can always search and find people who share your values and build relationships with them. Connect with people who don’t share your values to expand your horizons and to learn. Never change your values, but accept and respect others. Standing for what you believe doesn’t always work, in the short term; but it ALWAYS works, eventually.
Nov.15, 2017 – Showing Up
Showing up is the foundation of EVERYTHING. All your relationships require your presence. All success requires you to be in the right place. No matter what, show up for those you care about. Show up and watch your life get better. When you show up, everyone will know what to expect from you and will trust and rely on you. When you are trusted, you can accomplish anything.
Nov.16, 2017 – Lonely Road
While your road might feel cold and lonely, the truth is, you are where you have chosen to be and you will go where you chose to go and the road itself is something we do not have control over. When you feel cold, know that it will get better. When you feel lonely, invite others along your journey. Keep working, keep pushing toward your destination, and your road will get better.
Nov.17, 2017 – Create Fire
Fire needs fuel. The quality of the fire is determined by the amount and substance of the fuel. When your personal fuel is made up of a desire to succeed, the willingness to help others, and the ability to do good work. Your fire will be strong. Fire spreads the more fuel it has available. Bring the others on your journey, combine your fuel. Create fire.
Nov.18, 2017 – You Belong
You belong everywhere. If you don’t belong it is because you choose not to belong, not because others tell you that you are not enough, that you are not worthy, that you are too different. Let your differences be a light, let your uniqueness drive change. Make sure that you are choosing and not letting others choose for you.
Nov.18, 2017 – Finding Miracles
When you meet someone who changes your life, Hold On. When you meet someone who makes you better, Stay Close. Since our life is really just our relationships, always focus on the people that are in your life. Miracles are created by relationships that make everything a little better.
I am thankful I met Emilie 11 years ago. So thankful we held on.
Nov.20, 2017 – Make it Brighter
Your world is brighter as long as you are looking at your situation the right way. No matter where we are, our direction matters. Our focus determines our direction. It is all changeable. We can change our world by changing our focus. When we see things as full and good and real, that is what happens to our entire world. You choose the brightness by choosing our focus.
Nov.21, 2017 – Validation
We all want and need to be validated. The idea that you can be invalidated is false. You can only feel invalidated if you make that decision to allow the opinions of others to determine your self-worth. Easy to say, hard to do. We can seek validation while avoiding the feeling of being invalidated. By focusing on what we can offer and not what others say, we validate ourselves and ignore anything that doesn’t help us accomplish our mission.
Nov.22, 2017 – Diversity
Diversity always wins. Diversity of thought. Diversity in action. Diversity in technique. There is no progress is staying the same. We always must be improving and using diverse ways to create new success. Diverse people with diverse experiences is the best way to build a team. Diverse ideas united by diverse action is the way to drive new growth. More than respect, accept diversity. Embrace diversity and it will serve you forever.
Nov.23, 2017 – Showing Your Thanks and Giving
Do we really value what we are thankful for? Do our words match our actions? When we treat others with kindness, when we serve and support those we interact with, that is when our true colors are shown. Being thankful is the sign of an advanced heart and superior mind. Being thankful creates joy and acceptance. Showing your gratitude builds true relationships. By giving of ourselves, we are showing our thanks.
Nov.24, 2017 – What You Were Built For
You were made to succeed. Just because you are in repair mode, or are resting, or are being used for the wrong purpose doesn’t change that fact. You were built to win and built to help and built to share meaning and built experience joy. Work toward doing what you were made to do, until then be content knowing your time is coming as long as you continually work and prepare for your future greatness.
Nov.25, 2017 – Both Locations
Where you are is important. Where you are going is more important. Know both, let one guide the other but do not let either location dictate your happiness. Choose happiness while being present in reality.
Nov.26, 2017 – Fuel for The Fire of Life
Enthusiasm is the only thing you NEED. With enthusiasm you create passion. You find willpower. You drive results. You build consensus. With Enthusiasm, everything gets better and you always can find a solution. Enthusiasm is the fuel for the fire of life.
Nov.27, 2017 – Getting There
For now, all you need is to get there. All you need is a vehicle that helps you along your journey. It doesn’t need to be special, it just needs to be reliable. Once you have mastered your craft, mastered your relationships you then decide if you need to upgrade, until then. Keep pushing and striving with the tools that you know work.
Nov.28, 2017 – Imperfect and Needed
Broken is ok. Not perfect is ok. Experienced is ok. Not complete is ok. Take what you are, and find a way to use what you have to help others. We are all a work in progress. We are all forming and shaping and creating and striving. Helping others along on their journey is how you will cover all of your imperfections.
Nov.29, 2017 – Personal Power
Personal power is being able to deliver the results you want when you want, and with whom you want. It is far more important than positional power. Influence is about ability, desire, vision, and trust. With those 4 ingredients, you can create unlimited personal power.
Nov.30, 2017 – That Type
The people that lead others to achieve greatness are those who know themselves. When you know who you are, you can lead others. Once you know yourself, you need to make sure that you are the person that is honest, takes responsibility, shows care and concern for others, is positive, and shows gratitude. If you are THAT type of person, people will follow you anywhere.
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Originally published at mareomccracken.com