Let’s Get Intimate: “Why you should forgive all starting with yourself” With Dr. Theo Kousouli & Sasza Lohrey

Finally, forgive all starting with yourself. Forgive yourself for all shortcomings, failures and pain. Then forgive everyone else. Without forgiving all fully you stifle your own progression forward in creating your greatness. We tend to think that by holding grudges we accomplish some way of ‘getting even’ at someone or ‘winning’ over them. This is […]

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Finally, forgive all starting with yourself. Forgive yourself for all shortcomings, failures and pain. Then forgive everyone else. Without forgiving all fully you stifle your own progression forward in creating your greatness. We tend to think that by holding grudges we accomplish some way of ‘getting even’ at someone or ‘winning’ over them. This is far from the truth and the only one we end up hurting is ourselves. If there is one rule to purely loving yourself it’s this one. To love yourself fully, you must become love and feel love for everyone — first of all, yourself.

As a part of my series about “Connecting With Yourself To Live With Better Relationships” I had the pleasure to interview Keynote speaker, best-selling author, chiropractor and hypnotherapist, Dr. Theo Kousouli D.C., CHt.

Thank you so much for joining us! Let’s Get Intimate! I’d love to begin by asking you to give us the backstory as to what brought you to this specific career path.

It’s been quite an adventure thus far, and I’d like to think that it’s only getting better. It all started at 10 years of age and I remember it clearly as if it was yesterday. I was standing in front of my father’s bathroom mirror in NJ, about to slice my wrists because the pain of feeling unloved was just too much to bear. As I was starting to slice my left wrist with the blade, in an instant — a clarity of the situation hit me as a Divine echo vibrated through my body shouting ‘No!’. I immediately knew it was the toxic environment I was in that was the issue, not me. I, like many — was a victim of severe school bullying and emotional abuse at home. I went on to experience semi-paralysis from a pool accident, and two lifesaving heart surgeries after that, which put my life and my life’s purpose into perspective.

Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you hope that they might help people along their path to self-understanding or a better sense of wellbeing in their relationships?

Yes, I’ve been blessed to turn my personal traumas and clinical experience into seminars and self-help material that has healed many souls worldwide through the site www.BeAMaster.com. I teach people to reconnect to their inner power and higher-self through their nervous system — to remove physical pain and heal deep emotional loss. Other projects include production of hypnosis audios for quick transformational healing, seminars and more book topics in my Be A Master® Book Series. Yearly seminars on healing relationships, opening one’s psychic awareness and healing neurology are done throughout the year, and interested attendees can view more information at www.BeAMaster.com I continue to help patients around the world heal in my private wellness clinic through personal coaching and structural neural alignment, more information on this can be found at www.drkousouli.com

Do you have a personal story that you can share with our readers about your struggles or successes along your journey of self-understanding and self-love?

I wish everyone could understand their importance on this earth, early in their youth. I’m grateful I could turn my personal pain into my life’s work to help others. I grew up with a strict military father and a hypocritical religious mother. I felt numb and worthless in a home that showed little love, spewed anger and created dogmatic rules perpetuating worthlessness. I truly feel that many of our children are incorrectly parented in their early years. The first seven years of a child’s development determines the way that child will access their life as an adolescent and adult. This is the time their initial neurological mapping occurs which drives their whole forward progression. Learning to love yourself is vital in success — not only within one’s personal life, but also for their professional life. The earlier this is programmed correctly, the better the individual feels about themselves, handles challenges and adversities with ease and gets back up after failures or difficulties. A childhood with healthy programming cannot be understated. Parents bring in their children to imprint their skeletal and neurological structures for a strong healthy head-start in life. If faulty, the ‘program’ can, of course, be re-written as I help many do this as adults using the Kousouli® Method, a proprietary set of chiropractic and hypnosis techniques I have developed, speak on and discuss in my Be A Master® book series. Many parents catch their own destructive programming in their children and rush them in to keep their children from repeating their mistakes or programming which may have been also passed down from their parents or grandparents. It is much more beneficial to reprogram in infancy or young adulthood, than to rewire in adulthood. We literally change lives and in turn, society, by re-empowering the family unit. Because of the success my patients have experienced through my healing programs, I was urged to write a book on loving the self. The book is called “Be A Master® of Self-Love, 33 master secrets to loving your extraordinary life” and has brought countless people the joy of a new lease on life.

Was there ever a tipping point that triggered a change regarding your feelings of self acceptance?

Things got tougher after the unexplainable miracle I witnessed that kept me from ending my life at 10. It wasn’t until my first heart surgery at 28 years of age (to repair a congenital faulty aortic valve), while I was being wheeled into the operating room, that my life literally flashed before my eyes. I was being rushed down that cold dimly lit corridor unsure of my future — or if I was even going to have a future. It was the first time I was truly alone and admittedly terrified. I thought to myself, “This could be it. I may not come back.” I wasn’t sure what to expect when my eyes closed. Was I going to see the afterlife, was I going to come back with a stronger heart, or was the operation going to fail and I wouldn’t be the same — or worse, dead?” Until that day, my ego was in control and it was invincible. It had built a wall of anger against my parents, against bullies who tormented me, and most of all, God. I had become an atheist for about 9 months, from the time I received the news I needed heart surgery until shortly after the operation. I remember making a deal during that long ride down the cold hallway. I remember telling ‘God’ that If I was to come back to this world and open my eyes again, I wanted him to guide my steps. I acknowledged that my way of late-night partying, drinking, smoking, promiscuous women, and loose faith wasn’t fulfilling for real love. I asked, that if ‘He’ wanted me to come back, that he show me what real love is all about. He did not let me down. The literal and figurative healing of my heart and body was my first lesson back from the dead.

According to a recent study cited in Cosmopolitan, in the US, only about 28 percent of men and 26 percent of women are “very satisfied with their appearance.” Could you talk about what some of the causes might be, as well as the consequences?

The percentage is so low because both men and women are programmed by society, whether it is through billboards, magazine ads, television, radio or social media aps. These filter their lives through an ‘idea’ of perfection that is mass marketed, not unique. All media is edited and altered to create the final end image. No one looks exactly the way the magazine cover shows them as. No one. Comparing yourself to the mass market image of perfection is a recipe for disaster. It is far more productive to compare yourself to a previous version of yourself, moving ‘you’ forward daily.
 In my seminars I teach students how to break through the current matrix and re-create their significance in a way that makes them 90–100% satisfied with themselves once they realize they have created their current appearance, and that they can change both inner and outer self in a healthy way, whenever they wish. Everything is a programmable perception in this multidimensional, vibratory world of illusions. Why not mold the illusion to a happier and healthier version in line with what your heart and mind truly is? Undeniable Divinity.

As cheesy as it might sound to truly understand and “love yourself,” can you share with our readers a few reasons why it’s so important?

We can simply take a look at the state of our world today and see something must be done to heal the pain and suffering. We cannot continue to look at others ‘out there’ as the problem without going to the source of it all. The source is you and I. The source is our family, our friends, our local community. When we are strong as an individual, we can stand strong as a neighborhood, county, state and nation. You and I both owe it to ourselves as well as our community to be the best version of ourselves possible — in line with what we were created to become. There is no other higher purpose for living life than this.

Why do you think people stay in mediocre relationships? What advice would you give to our readers regarding this?

When I talk about self-love and understanding I don’t necessarily mean blindly loving and accepting ourselves the way we are. Many times self-understanding requires us to reflect and ask ourselves the tough questions, to realize perhaps where we need to make changes in ourselves to be better not only for ourselves but our relationships. What are some of those tough questions that will cut through the safe space of comfort we like to maintain, that our readers might want to ask themselves? Can you share an example of a time that you had to reflect and realize how you needed to make changes?

How does achieving a certain level of self-understanding and self-love then affect your ability to connect with and deepen your relationships with others?

It is important to keep personal judgments silent and make an effort to learn all one can about another before coming to a conclusion. Initial snap judgements are rarely correct, and stereotypes involving prejudice usually cloud one’s clear heart and mind. In my other book, Be A Master® of Self Image, I cover various topics for self-image improvement including looking at yourself from a new angle with a healthier perception.

What are 6 strategies that you implement to maintain your connection with and love for yourself, that our readers might learn from? Could you please give a story or example for each?

I would be delighted to share. The following tips are just a few of my favorites from “Be A Master® of Self-Love, 33 master secrets to loving your extraordinary life”
 First, gain a healthy awareness to your personal situation. Everyone’s situation is different, and it is important to understand the issue both from a unique and mass perception. The awareness that your situation is yours, but also shared with others in other ‘similar’ ways is key to knowing that you are not alone.

Second, seek professional help if abuse or trauma has occurred. This includes speaking to the proper authorities if crime was committed and reconnect your spiritual connection through a higher power or faith-based group. Then surround yourself with positive minded mentors who have traveled the path before you and have created massive changes for themselves and others. It is the seeking out of those in positions of influence and massive forward life momentum that you can learn from, that help change your life. Continually surrounding yourself with friends of the same level of pain frequency comforts, but may not help facilitate the changes needed. Misery loves company, but it does little to empower.
 Third, take action and spend healthy time alone learning more about yourself. Society, friends and family can be very demanding about what they want you to be or what they want to mold you into. It’s imperative that you learn what you want in life and who you are. Healthy time alone reading self-empowerment books and doing the physical activities you enjoy is important in self-development and self-love. It’s important to dream also, but you must take action to make those dreams a reality. Once you start learning to do this for yourself, manifestation comes next, and the magic of life starts to prove to you that you can create anything your heart desires.

Fourth, learn to meditate and pray correctly. This continues to move your personal power to higher levels, and away from victimhood. In my psychic empowerment seminars, my students learn advanced ways to self-love. We are intimately connected to the power that creates all things on this earth. Learn to harness that power and you will forever change the course of your life.

Fifth, set up and respect your personal boundaries. This has a lot to do with your vibratory frequency and how you move it around in the world to attract what you desire. Learning to stand up for yourself and not let others abuse your time and energy is also part of successful energy exchange.

Finally, forgive all starting with yourself. Forgive yourself for all shortcomings, failures and pain. Then forgive everyone else. Without forgiving all fully you stifle your own progression forward in creating your greatness. We tend to think that by holding grudges we accomplish some way of ‘getting even’ at someone or ‘winning’ over them. This is far from the truth and the only one we end up hurting is ourselves. If there is one rule to purely loving yourself it’s this one. To love yourself fully, you must become love and feel love for everyone — first of all, yourself.

You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? Maybe we’ll inspire our readers to start it…

It would be to open the table of communication and understanding of one another. We must surpass politics, religion, race, sex, age, and be first and foremost loving human beings. I feel if we could bring all our differences into the open, allowing free discussion in a loving, fearless, neutral environment without judgement, most — if not all — of our unaddressed challenges would be healed.

Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote” that you use to guide yourself by? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life and how our readers might learn to live by it in theirs?

Besides the limitless quotes of inspiration and healing the Holy Bible and works of Jesus Christ offers me, I have fallen in love with the “Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude.” quote by Zig Ziglar. It has been an amazing truth in my life, and continues to inspire me to know my worth through any challenge. I, like countless others who have been pushed down and beaten up repeatedly, have had some serious health and life challenges. It was my attitude and early realization that I am able to deliver to this world the gift within. This alone kept me going. It hasn’t been easy. I know I will go through a third surgery to keep me alive when my current valve runs its course and needs replacing in the years to come. Nevertheless, I push on doing my best.
 Events and circumstances don’t matter as much as your response to them. How are you responding to others? What is your individual relationship with others, especially between your family and spouse? Where can you improve? Where can you excel? Where can you take the high road, and mend a heart with your light and love? Can you go deeper? Where can you apply the gift of compassion? It all starts with each of us asking the hard questions and doing the hard work within ourselves. 
 I want to let your readers and audience know that no matter the difficulty, no matter the hardship, even if you find yourself with razors to your wrists crying, angry, deeply wronged by the world, hurting in your heart and about to end it all; I want you to know that you can overcome, you can climb high, and you can win. You can win big by choosing YOU. Yes, you can be a master of your life.

Thank you so much for your time and for your inspiring insights!

My pleasure to share my knowledge and expertise and I thank you for the opportunity. My door is open to anyone seeking healing of the mind, body or heart. Many Blessings,
 Dr. Theodoros Kousouli D.C., C.Ht.
 Kousouli Health & Wellness
 6404 Wilshire Blvd #700 LA, CA 90048
 Office: 310.777.3463

Events & Book Series

About the Author:

Sasza Lohrey is the Founder & CEO of BBXX, a digital platform for intimacy and wellbeing. She is also the host of the BBXX podcast, “Let’s Get Intimate!” which hosts provocative and entertaining conversations with experts in order to challenge the way our culture conditions us to talk about sex, intimacy, and healthy relationships. BBXX was created in order to help people better understand themselves, so that they then can form deeper and more fulfilling relationships with others. Sasza is a former D1 athlete with a background in psychology and digital media. She is a member of the Women of Sex Tech collective, the co-mentorship community Dreamers and Doers, and a regular columnist for several online publications. Originally from the Bay Area, Sasza founded BBXX during a Stanford entrepreneurship program in Santiago, Chile. Learn more on our website and listen to more interviews with experts on our top-rated podcast!

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