The reality is that we’re in a relationship with others all the time. Lovers, siblings, parents, our doctor, hairdresser or teacher. Another reality is, we are in these relationships with expectations, and when those expectations aren’t met, we get disappointed, discouraged and sometimes divorced!
If you’re always feeling let down with your relationships, family, friends, lovers — you might want to ask, what’s happening here? What’s the pattern?All relationships are a contract of expectations of behavior, and that contract is rarely spoken or documented, so it’s no wonder there’s huge let-downs all the time. However there are ways to mitigate this eventuality. 5 easy simple but profound steps that will move you towards healthy, vibrant flourishing relationships.
- Know yourself really well. Know what you absolutely need in any relationship — kindness, laughter, honesty, intelligence as examples, and make a list. Then go through that list and check to see if you give yourself those values. Because your relationship with yourself is the cornerstone of all relationships.
- What are your life relationship priorities, over the next six to 12 months? Maybe one of them could be mending or improving the relationship with your sister, boss or lover? Write down your priorities, then decide the actions you’re going to take over the next 3, 6 and 12 months to make that happen.
3. If you want to meet your soul mate or life partner you need to work on the higher-self energy that attracts them. That energy has to be clear as crystal and filled with your values, priorities, and what you are prepared to give to keep that relationship strong and healthy. If you live in that energy, like minded people will be attracted to you We’re aiming for a true partnership here!
4. Sometimes a relationship with a long time friend can become stagnant or stale, and you miss the laughter, warmth and camaraderie you once had, use the ‘appreciation process’ to re-kindle that feeling between you. “When I was young my friend and I were _________ to each other. This is what I can do to re-kindle that feeling _________” Awareness of the existing change and action to make a preferred change is very likely to bring your friendship to a new and welcome level.
Change happens when you choose it to happen. If you want to change your relationships into vibrant, loving, nourishing interactions, get rid of the snapshots of what was, and move into your relationships in the future, aware of the unspoken contract between you.
Originally published at medium.com