Activity Recreation//

Lenny Kravitz and Lisa Bonet Have Mastered Co-parenting and the Amicable Divorce

They can teach us a lot about successful co-parenting.

LOS ANGELES, CA - FEBRUARY 10:  Musician Lenny Kravitz (R) and actress Lisa Bonet arrive at SAINT LAURENT At The Palladium at Hollywood Palladium on February 10, 2016 in Los Angeles, California.  (Photo by Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic)
LOS ANGELES, CA - FEBRUARY 10: Musician Lenny Kravitz (R) and actress Lisa Bonet arrive at SAINT LAURENT At The Palladium at Hollywood Palladium on February 10, 2016 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/FilmMagic)

Lenny Kravitz and Lisa Bonet are two of the ultimate role models for a positive divorce, and for successful co-parenting. Over the course of the past 25 years — yes, it really has been that long — the former couple and parents to 30-year-old Zoë Kravitz have shown that it’s completely possible to not just amicably separate, but become closer than ever in the process. That was confirmed once again when Kravitz and Bonet’s current husband Jason Momoa shared a photo of the friendship rings the two have.

Momoa posted a photo of himself and Kravitz wearing matching rings on Instagram, revealing that they were a gift from him to his wife’s ex-husband. “I got @lennykravitz a present made by @leroyswoodentattoos amazing bone skull ring,” Momoa wrote in the caption. The Aquaman and Game of Thrones actor appears to have grown closer to Kravitz over the past year, since he and Bonet tied the knot. (Momoa and Bonet share two children together, 10-year-old Lola and 9-year-old Nakoa-Wolf.)

Even though Kravitz and Bonet no longer have to co-parent their 30-year-old daughter — at least, not in a legal sense — they still spend the holidays together as one family. Bonet revealed as much earlier this year when talking about her family’s Thanksgiving tradition, which includes Kravitz. “It’s fantastic. It’s full-on family love,” she told Porter Magazine.

Kravitz has also talked about their journey as friendly divorcées, telling Oprah’s Master Class, “Zoe’s mom and I now are best friends. That’s how the relationship started. It makes you feel really good when you can do that… We had Zoe, which is, I see now, what it was all about. It was really all about bringing this beautiful child to the planet and also sharing the love that [Lisa and I] had. When we’re all together now — [Lisa], her kids, Zoe, me — we’re all together and we’re one big happy family. It’s beautiful and it just shows you what can be done.” (That includes going to the 2015 Met Gala together as a family, below.)

View this post on Instagram

#MetBall2015. Family.

A post shared by Lenny Kravitz (@lennykravitz) on May 4, 2015 at 8:37pm PDT

That same year, Zoë Kravitz talked about how thankful she is that her parents have managed to stay friends. “They have so much love for each other,” she told Ocean Drive of her mom, dad, and Momoa. “It makes things so easy that my parents are still very close. My dad and my step-dad get along really well, and my dad loves and is close with my brother [Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa] and sister [Lola Iolani Momoa]… As long as everyone can be in the same room together, and have love for each other, it’s totally healthy.”

If you’re wondering how to survive divorce and successfully co-parent afterward, it all comes down to processing feelings in a healthy way. “A good divorce has as its outcome partners who focus on divorcing amicably,” Constance Ahrons, Ph.D., author of The Good Divorce and We’re Still Family tells Thrive. “They are able to let go of marital angers and choose to be fair with each other. They also choose a process, like mediation or collaborative divorce, that supports their continuing relationship and does not position the partners as enemies. It helps if partners are able to grieve the losses that divorce inevitably brings.” This isn’t always easy — divorce is often by its nature a stressful process — but putting your shared children’s needs top of mind can often help you in your attempts to let go of your anger. That, in turn, can have overall positive effects for your mental health and well-being.

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