I do everything I can to not compare myself. One of my favorite affirmations is ‘your game is not my game.’ My game, my speed, my way, my choice, my life. No one else’s.
Do you ever wake up in the morning feeling unhappy, unfulfilled, unchallenged, and have nothing to look forward to? It doesn’t have to be that way. One idea that I always advice my clients is to “Get Out of your mind and connect with your spirit” Do your meditations. You don’t have to sit in an uncomfortable pose and do “om” all day long. You can start with easy, comfy poses- laying down in your pjs and listening to the guided meditations.
As a part of our series interviewing experts on how to live a “ravenous life” — a life filled with the passion, pleasure, playfulness and abundance that come naturally to those who dare to be authentic, I had the pleasure of interviewing Elle Petrillo. Elle is the Host of the Unfiltered Life Podcast where she challenges people to stop pretending and own who they are. From New York to Montana, Disney Cast member to Door to Door Sales, Partner at 23 to fired at 31, Elle is unapologetically flawed. She is a founding member and Personal Brand Strategist with Brand Builders Group, where she delivers the honest truth about what it takes to turn your personality into profit.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Can you tell us a story about what brought you to this specific career path?
I am unable to share this at the moment.
What does it mean for you to live “on purpose”? Can you explain? How can one achieve that?
For me, living on purpose is being true to who I am. It’s knowing who I am and who I want to become. It’s owning it and celebrating it — knowing that change is inevitable and we always grow through change. I want to show up as me and give others the permission to stop saving face and do the same so they can build strong, lasting friendships/relationships.
Do you have an example or story in your own life of how your pain helped to guide you to finding your life’s purpose?
When I was married, my ex-husband battled an addiction. I hid it from the majority of people in my life to protect him and out of my own shame and guilt. By doing this, I lost my mind. I was depressed, scared, lonely and had a hard time really connecting with anyone because I was hiding so much. This is why I want to share stories of the real shit that real people go through in hopes of building a community that helps eliminate the feelings of loneliness, guilt, shame, depression that cause people to go down a long, hard path.
The United States is currently rated at #18 in the World Happiness Report. Can you share a few reasons why you think the ranking is so low?
I believe this is ranked so low because our country doesn’t put an emphasis on the quality of your life. There are countries that provide free university education and health care to all of it’s citizens. Some countries where it is encouraged for people to take naps during the day and to recharge with their family. Others where women AND men are alotted longer maternity and paternity leaves. Imagine what that would do if it was a part of our culture.
How have you used your success to bring goodness to the world?
I think I am still working towards this. We are building ways into our business where we can support different charities. I have chosen to support Thistle Farms which is based here in Nashville.
What are your 6 strategies to help you face your day with exuberance, “Joie De Vivre” and a “ravenous thirst for life”? Can you please give a story or example for each?
- I get really irritated when people complain about what others post on social media because I believe you get to choose your experience. I personally am particular about who I follow on the social media tools that I utilize the most in order to make sure it feeds positivity to me. If it doesn’t make me laugh, inspired, encouraged or positively challenged then chances are I don’t follow it.
- Just like I am particular about who I follow, I am particular about who I go to if I am struggling. I have certain friends that are my ‘good vibes tribe’ or ‘hype crew’ that I turn to for a mental adjustment. For example, when I was fired, the first friend I spoke to was someone who is a strong Christian woman. I went to her purposefully because I knew she would speak faith into our conversation and give me the mindset I needed at the time.
- I do everything I can to not compare myself. One of my favorite affirmations is ‘your game is not my game.’ My game, my speed, my way, my choice, my life. No one else’s. Recently, I was working out with a small group of friends and we were running this really tough hill at the Capitol in downtown Nashville. I was going at my own pace and not trying to beat anyone. I had a friend ask me if I played sports and was surprised when I said I did. She was like well you’re not very competitive. I responded that I am when I want to be. Sometimes I allow competition to drive me, other times I know it doesn’t serve me. I was working out with men who are faster and fitter than me. It would have only discouraged me and exhausted me to try to keep up with them.
- I don’t schedule calls before 9 AM. I need my time in the morning and not like some people where I get up, work out, read, make breakfast, do emails, etc. I just actually like to enjoy my morning in bed thinking about life and then I either meditate using Simple Habit, play music or read my Bible with a cup of coffee. It allows me to feel like I am running my day and work doesn’t run me.
- I am committed to supporting my friends. Like I said earlier, I am particular about my friend group. I am fortunate enough to have a friend group who really does kick ass at life and they are doing really cool stuff. They run foundations, sing, host events, run races, etc. I love to show up whenever I can for them and by being there, cheering them on, I am invigorated and it lasts for days. One of my friends, Fabi Powell, runs the Josh Powell Foundation and she recently had a night where she got a variety of musicians to come play at a benefit concert. I had 3 events scheduled that night and that was the last one. I believe that showing up is 80% of the battle. If you just show up, good things happen. I only got to chat with her for a few minutes, but I got to reconnect with some people I haven’t seen in a while, support her by being there and contributing financially to a cause that I believe in. This deepened our friendship ten fold which will repay itself over and over again.
- I cut out the bullshit. If I’m neutral about something, I don’t do it. If there is something I’m allowing into my life that I notice starts stressing me out or distracting me, I cut it out. Recently, I decided to go on a dating hiatus and delete all dating apps from my phone. I was so neutral on everyone I was meeting. Yes, they were cool. Yes, they were attractive. But — I was neutral and it was draining me so I decided to cut it out for now.
Do you have any favorite books, podcasts, or resources that most inspired you to live with a thirst for life?
School of Greatness — Lewis Howes
Oprah Super Soul Conversations
Take the Stairs
The Code of the Extraordinary Mind
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote” that relates to having a Joie De Vivre? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
“The master in the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence at whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him he’s always doing both.” -James Michener
I discovered this quote when I was in college and it has always been something I go back to. I can’t say I’ve mastered it yet, but that is my goal.
Are you working on any exciting new projects now? How do you think that will help people?
I recently helped launch a company called The Brand Builders Group where we are helping people who have a desire to build a personal brand that also makes them money. During this venture, I have been working on building my personal brand called ‘Unfiltered Life with Elle.’ My entire brand is helping people learn how to be their damn selves, build a strong community and battle loneliness. It’s about the real shit that happens in our lives and the untold sides of these redemption stories such as getting fired, divorce, addiction, suicide, etc.
About The Author:
Dr. Marina Kostina is a life and business fulfillment coach. She uses research and energy work to help professional women find their purpose and turn it into a profitable business. Dr. Kostina incorporates innovative marketing strategies and the creation of engaging, lucrative online courses to scale their businesses. As a result they enjoy what she describes as a “ravenous life” — a life filled with the passion, pleasure, playfulness and abundance that come naturally to those who dare to be authentic. Her book “Find the G-Spot of Your Soul” is available January 2018. Download a free gift from Dr. Kostina- an MP3 Meditation Album “Find The G –Spot Of Your Soul” and get unstuck.
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