A QUESTION CAME INTO MY INBOX TODAY:
We cannot always plan for the future but time and again that is what we were taught to do and is sometimes expected in our society to follow the norms.
You are graduating from college, find a good job. You got a new job, find a partner, buy a house and so on. you get the point…
We always planned for things we couldn’t control until we asked the question: Why? Building resilience didn’t come from the uncertainty, I believe it comes from being ok with the unknown. When things don’t go as planned, we let fear creep in and it destroys your dreams. All we need to remember at that moment is “There is always Hope for a better tomorrow”.
People from around the world came together to help me at times when it I had a foggy outlook and I am always truly grateful for the serendipity and kindness around me.
I recently joined a new company and boy did my imposter syndrome kick in. I let my doubts get to me faster than the high speed bullet train, I experienced in Japan. I knew I was better than this, but it took time to pull myself out of the whirlwind storm in my mind.
I started to find reasons to not be able to do what I set out to do. Then I looked to the CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) frameworks from Dr. David Burns I learnt. I wish everyone learns this during childhood and a refresher at adulthood. It comes handy when you least expect it.
- Reframe the negative thought. Be objective. Find the truth and reason.
- Shift the negative thought into a positive emotion.
- Accept the feeling and don’t push it under the rug. Experience the flood of emotions and feel the feeling in its purest form.
My Fearless Symphony team/family helped me time and time again. Knowing how I was determined to not let old patterns and habits get the most of me, our leader would check in to make sure I was doing ok, even though she has much bigger challenges ahead of her. Her will to fight and her perseverance gives me hope that I can do this and build resilience to take on more challenges as we navigate into the unknown.
Another example was when I was watching the news and reading nextdoor posts and it was building anxiety. Her sage advice: unsubscribe so the negative news is not impacting your day to day. I love her perspective on finding solutions to problems we create ourselves.
We don’t know what the future holds and optimism today will go a long way into the world ahead. I aim to live in the present and do what I can in this moment. I hope tomorrow will be better than today because I am always better today than yesterday.