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In My Mind

When this happens ...

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If I’m going to be totally honest, I need to acknowledge (to myself) that during this pandemic I’ve been feeling mildly depressed. Not all the time. It comes in waves. When this happens however, I recognize that I go into over productive mode.

Realizing this, I understand that it’s my way of trying to escape my feelings. It’s a distraction; my avoidance from feeling lousy. As well, I also recognize my need to constantly be my own cheerleader, and it can be exhausting.

Despite everything I’ve learned, read and adopted in my life around mindset, and knowing that ‘your thoughts are not that of your own’ and all the tools and resources available, when I feel crappy, all that goes out the window – Why? Because it takes constant practice and reinforcement to become really good at understanding our many emotions that we as humans have. And sometimes it’s a lot easier to just go through the crappy emotion realizing that ‘this too shall pass.’ Man, I’ve been saying THAT a lot lately.

Yes, this pandemic has thrown me for a loop. The bouncing back and forth from locked down to things being a little more lenient, then back to locked down again. Social distancing where hugs are out of the question. Too many meetings on zoom where I can feel my muscles in my shoulders seize up. For sure, daily exercise helps to relieve this. I’m horrible at sitting. Truly, I need to move around, and often.

On the upside, this experience, as it certainly has been that has enhanced my skills and further understanding. It has elevated my thinking and enabled me to think even further as to how I can help and support others. I know that when my focus and attention is on helping others, I’m a much happier person.

Ironically as I say ‘I,’ it’s in fact NOT about me at all. Sure, the results of helping others brings me joy. This is why it feels so good to help. To serve. To volunteer. To give back.

So, yes, this pandemic has been very difficult, and yet it lives mostly in my mind, as I’m grateful that I’m healthy, I also recognize that my emotional set point is naturally that of being optimistic and positive, so I can only imagine if you’re emotional wellbeing is low. Climbing to an elevation where it brings you more hope can be a steep climb. But keep climbing.

If I may suggest, when you’re feeling like you’re alone, isolated, struggling for so many reasons due to this pandemic, I encourage you to reflect on what you do have. Certainly, I don’t know your current circumstances or the conditions of your life, but I do know that you don’t have to go it alone. 

Choose and action one thing in your life that will help to improve your mindset: your wellbeing, your circumstances. One thing. You’ll be surprised as to the domino effect it has on the rest of your life.

I’d like to qualify this by saying give yourself time to find what you need. By time I mean you need to take action to get what you need. Keep moving ahead. For example, if you’re interested in joining a social group, community, or event make sure that you feel welcomed and relevant. It takes time, and it’s worth it, because in fact some groups that you join (many in fact) may have you feeling even more isolated. When that happens, it’s natural for you to want to retreat as it can be discouraging, and then as a result you stop exploring – keep going. Explore and find what works for you. 

Whether it’s; joining a virtual workout – any kind of workout. It’s a great mood booster; an entrepreneurs or mastermind group; a book club; start journaling – writing down your thoughts helps you recognize your feelings more objectively; ask a few people to join you for a virtual coffee/tea (it could even be random people) – just start the conversation; reach out to interest groups or communities where you will feel connected.

At first it may feel awkward or perhaps even forced, and yet only you can start the process to getting yourself out there and involved. Something will click if you give it time.

If you still find yourself stuck and, in a rut, reach out. I’ll give you nudge (maybe you need a push) in the right direction. 

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    People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

    - MARCUS AURELIUS

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