Far be it from me to hold back. But I actually do now. For me, that’s not really what I want to do, since I’m already kind of an introvert and a listener more than a talker. But the fact is, I’m a grown woman and I think I’m pretty awesome, smart, funny, you know. Even though I’m on the quieter side, I like to banter about hot button issues sometimes. But as of late, I’ve decided to just keep the peace, stay in my own zen, and shut the hell up.
Ok, so all of you other women in midlife, don’t take this the wrong way. I don’t mean I’m old and that makes me tired. On the contrary. I’m tired of mindless stuff. I don’t enjoy pointless arguments, moodiness, or people that get offended by every little thing. It literally wears me out. It’s work to be in a convo with people like this. That’s why I say tired. Because I’m done working hard at stuff that should be easy.
I’m just not that serious
Getting to this stage in life is pretty damn exciting. I feel like most women at this point would consider that they have “paid their dues”. Well, at least I do. I have always worked really hard, raised a slew of kids, lived at basketball games, dance competitions, pageants, and a bunch of other stuff, for a number of years. Those were the best times of my life, by the way. Anyway, a lot of things were “emergencies” for a lot of years. Now, I want to have some fun. I want to relax. I’m just not looking for serious anymore, I’m looking for mental stimulation, playtime and lightness.
I’m a good person, and I don’t need to be judged by the judgers
I’m good, I have a good heart, and I’m a God-fearing person of faith. I give to charity, and I help people that need help in the best way I can. That said, God gave me a brain. It’s unique. So is everyones, right? Well, you would think that means we all get to have our own thoughts and opinions, and as long as we’re not going around hurting anyone, we’re all good. Wrong-o, my friend. You shall be judged if your brain puts thoughts together in a way that is different than the loud talkers. Spare me. I sleep well at night, I wonder if they do. Maybe they’re just too worked up to relax. Maybe some breath work would help.
I’ve been there, done that
I’ve seen a lot of things in my life, so not many things surprise me anymore. But there are people out there that think that everything they’re doing, saying, or feeling has never been done, said, or felt. Here we go again. Let’s see..I’ve struggled financially at times, had relationship drama, lost people I love, I have owned a business, grew up in an immigrant family, a nice variety of events, you know the drill. Contrary to the drama creators out there, I don’t need to make a thing out of stuff. You know why? Noone cares that much. I’m convinced that people are too busy thinking about themselves-well at least they used to be, not so much anymore.
Mom of 4 millennial daughters, so I’m drama-ed out
This is the most self explanatory reason of all that I’m pursuing peace, pleasant conversation, and why I can no longer open myself up to any kind of drama or sass. My girls are the light of my life. But let’s face it, there are 4 of them and one of me… I think I can stop right there.
Some people might think this is a cop out, but you’re probably a judger so I don’t listen to you anymore, remember? Maybe someone else might think that it’s weak, or “standing for nothing”. No, that’s not true, I stand for a lot of things. I just don’t need to do it publicly, socially, loudly, or even standing up for that matter.
If the price of entry for peace and quiet is not sharing too many opinions in mixed social scenes, I’ll take an entire roll of tickets, please. I’ll just be over here with my glass of wine.