Community//

If I Could Just Get Them to Change, Then Things Would be OK

Can we learn to accept, appreciate, and manage differences in people?

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres on our open platform. We publish pieces as written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Community stories are not commissioned by our editorial team and must meet our guidelines prior to being published.

I have a number of personal coaching clients and one theme has surfaced many times. Come to think of it, it is also prevalent in the lives of friends and relatives.

A busy attorney is scaling new professional heights, but his son is investigating controlled substances and has had several brushes with the law. He knows that if he could get his son to change life would be perfect.

An entrepreneur is grappling a key-employee issue. The guy is brilliant and gets the job done. But he is also brusque and alienates everyone. Including, unfortunately, clients. If only he could get him to change…

A senior executive works long hours. When he gets home, he just wants to put his feet up and relax and watch some junk on the idiot box. He was a dutiful father and chauffeured children to various activities when young. But now that they have left the house he feels entitled to his ‘relax’ time. But his wife wants to go out for dinner every day and with persons he finds intolerable. If only he could get her to change…

An extremely house-proud woman has a beautiful, almost perfectly trained dog. But he insists on latching on to the trousers of male visitors and his sharp teeth have left many holes. If only she could get the dog to modify his behavior…

We are all stuck in the same rut.

We are all trying to fix someone – children, spouses, parents, siblings, relatives, colleagues, bosses, vendors, subordinates and even pets.

Think about how you have made your wellbeing hostage to the behavior of others. They do something and you punish yourself by becoming miserable.

They are who they are.

You can try to change them, but success is not guaranteed, and failure is likely.

Accept this gracefully. You also are who you are.

Try to make changes in yourself and remember that the hunchback is oblivious to his own crook as he notes those of others.

Does this mean that you do not try to induce positive change – or what you consider to be positive change – in others?

Of course not. It simply means that when you fail, and this will happen often, you do not let it affect your equanimity.

People are different for a reason. Learn to accept and celebrate that difference.

For more information go to: https: theraoinstitute.com

You can reach Dr. Rao directly here: [email protected]

Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...

Community//

How Determination and Hard Work Influenced This Entrepreneur to Improve The Lives of Hundreds of People

by Sofia Vargas
Well-Being//

8 mistakes I made as a mom of an autistic child

by Tulika Prasad
Community//

Shifting From Impulse To Greater Choice

by Remmington Curtis
We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.