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I Lived In A Cage And It Sucked

I recently bought Glennon Doyle’s book “Untamed” and I’m so glad I did. I’m resonating with her stories. She’s like my sister from another mister, who like me lived in a cage of expectations to be someone she wasn’t in order to fit in with everyone else. While I’m not finished with the book, what I’ve read made […]

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cage

I recently bought Glennon Doyle’s book “Untamed” and I’m so glad I did. I’m resonating with her stories. She’s like my sister from another mister, who like me lived in a cage of expectations to be someone she wasn’t in order to fit in with everyone else.

While I’m not finished with the book, what I’ve read made me ask myself this question; am I living my truth and being the most uncaged version of me?

My answer…

Not completely and not in all the ways I can. 

For example, I still have my moments when I don’t share my feelings to avoid rocking the boat. And most recently I realized that I was delaying (a nicer way of saying that I’ve been procrastinating) the work on my book, “The Stories I Told Myself” ….guess why? Writing it is requiring me to stand firmly in my truth, being the most vulnerable and raw that I’ve ever been. 

BUT even though I have some work left to do, I’m proud to say, I’m living my truth more now than ever before. I’ve come out of my cage for the most part. (I think I still a few toes or maybe even a foot in the cage which is a heck of a lot better than my whole self.)

STEPPING OUT OF THE CAGE

Gloria Steinem, taking a verse from the Bible, once said…”The truth will set you free, but first, it will piss you off.” And as I think about living my truth untamed and uncaged (like Glennon) a sense of freedom washes over me. I can’t say it pisses me off so much as it scares the crap out of me to completely step outside the cage. 

What if stepping outside of it isn’t safe? What if my truth pisses others off? (Meet my inner critic, folks!)

Regardless what my inner critic says, I know a) the scary feeling and inner critic are just reminding me how important it is to me to live my truth, b) that the truth is my key to stay outside of the cage once and for all, and c) I’ve never grown from a place of comfort.

So, what is my truth? 

FOLLOWING MY NORTH STAR

My truth is my North Star and if I’m completely present to it, I know when I’m following it versus not following it. 

What I’m finally coming to realize, my truth is about making me proud, proud of me as I am. It’s not about doing what’s expected of me but rather doing what I expect of me. My truth is showing up like me, even if me in that moment is cranky and irritable. 

Being able to show up authentically, no matter what that looks like is the greatest gift I can give myself and the best thing I can do for my mindset. 

Here’s the thing, if I DON’T continue to work on living my truth I’ll allow my inner critic to convince me that it’s safer to morph into someone to please others… which always leads to me settling and going back in the cage.

At the end of the day, I’m here to live for me. I’m not here to live for others. I’m not here to be someone I’m not so that I fit just anywhere. And I’m damn sure not going to settle so I wind up back in that cage.

I’m committed now more than ever (thank you. Glennon) to be my uncaged self which means doing the following…

– Sharing my feelings when it’s important to do so.
– When I feel that I’m veering away from my North Star asking myself, “What is my truth right now?” and then paying close attention to what I think and feel.
– Finishing my book no matter what!

SOME THINGS TO REMEMBER

As I continue my work living my truth I’m going to use the following reminders as support…

1) There are going to be people who aren’t going to jive with my truth and that’s OK. For every person that doesn’t, there are those that will. What’s most important is knowing that I’ll always jive with me when I’m living my truth. 
2) My truth doesn’t need to compare itself to someone else’s to see if it measures up. My truth is good enough!
3) My truth doesn’t need to judge someone else’s in order to validate it. My truth doesn’t need validation.
4) My truth is mine. It’s for me and defined only by me. 

So, my friends, I want to ask you a question…

Are you living your truth and being the most uncaged version of yourself? If not, and if you’re in need of support in finding your key to the cage be sure to reach out!

(As originally published on www.whatswithinu.com)

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