Sensitive people are portrayed as victims, and this is so far from the truth.
Sensitive people have so many superpowers like high levels of creativity, innovation, people skills like no one else, and the ability to articulate feelings into specific and tangible outcomes.
Maximizing your emotional intelligence will help you develop a strong and healthy mindset so that you can excel in all areas of life with peace of mind.
I was born as a Highly Sensitive person and an Empath. In scientific terms, this means that my nervous system is easily aroused by external stimuli like noise, light, and people’s energies.
An Empath is someone whose mirror neuron for compassion is in overload, we don’t have a shock absorber and absorb people’s energies, feelings, and emotions. Dr. Judith Orloff has researched widely about Empaths and Highly Sensitive People.
The scientific meanings can seem very disempowering as if we don’t control what we feel and how it affects us.
Like many sensitive people and Empaths, I had no idea that there was even a name, a label, and a scientific meaning.
I had no idea this was even a thing. For me, I believed that this was who I am. I had to live life with anxiety, fear, and feelings of depression.
My childhood, school years, and working felt excruciating at times. Many times when I think about it now.
Imagine walking into a room and feeling what everyone else is thinking, feeling, and believing that these are your emotions too. It felt drained, and I was exhausted every single day.
Every single day was full of the unexpected and anxiety for how people would perceive me while feeling afraid of my feelings.
Taking back control of my emotions
I had no idea that most of these feelings were not mine and that I had the power to turn things around.
Only after two decades, I decided to take control of my life. I decided to adopt a mindset of empowerment, ditch the victim mentality and start managing my emotions in healthy ways.
It was the most empowering decision and time in my life as I changed my entire lifestyle to live my purpose in helping others make sense and manage their emotions.
It only took becoming aware of how leveraging my emotional intelligence helped me Thrive instead of feeling like I am surviving every day.
These are three steps which helped me jumpstart my journey of empowerment:
Step One: Awareness
Becoming aware that I was sensitive to other people’s emotions and drama felt weird at first.
I mean, how can it be that I am so mindful of other people’s energies while thinking they were mine? They felt genuine to me, and I felt them in every cell of my body. This is because our nervous system is so much more active and sensitive than someone who has a less painful nervous system.
For Empaths, it goes even a step further as our shock absorber does not work like most people because of how our brain is wired. The mirror neuron for compassion is basically on steroids!
Step Two: Acceptance
The second step is to accept that how you perceive and feel the outside world is different than other people. It does not make you weird or unusual or less worthy, the opposite!
Accept that every human being has a separate map of the world and a different way of functioning. And wouldn’t life be boring if everyone was the same? By accepting that your nervous system reacts differently to outside stimuli and to people’s emotions, you can now begin to adopt a mindset of empowerment.
Step Three: Empowerment
Now that you are aware of how you perceive and feel emotions and have accepted that this is how you function in life, you can take back your power by becoming a deliberate thinker.
What is deliberate thinking, Nadja?
If you tell yourself that you are sensitive and people should behave better or be aware of your feelings, you are, in essence, trying to control all outside factors. This is just impossible.
Other people will never behave the way you want them to, and demanding they do so because you have a sensitive nervous system will not change that. What does work and feels so much more empowering is choosing your thoughts. You have the power to decide which thoughts you would like to think.
Do you continue to fall in the trap of negative thinking and thus perpetuating negative emotions?
Or are you choosing your thoughts deliberately, which feel good and perpetuate positive emotions?
What you tell yourself and how you label your emotions and feelings is essential to thriving in life instead of feeling like you are surviving.
Choose to feel your thoughts up your emotional scale. Reach out for thoughts that feel better, thoughts your belief and thoughts which will fuel your positive emotions.
It is part of training your mindset and developing healthy thinking patterns.
Decide what you are going to feel as despite what you may have experienced as a child or as an adult, you do control your thinking.
Practice it with baby steps by choosing one thought at a time, every single day. Soon, you will be a powerful deliberate thinker!