When someone says loss, we normally think of the death of a loved one. I thought the same until 2014, when after the death of my husband, I lost my job, home, and friendships. The pain and sadness I experienced was overwhelming however, with the right tools and time I was able to heal and put my life back together.

People understand when someone grieves a death however, people may not understand or even think you are crazy for grieving the end of a friendship, relationship or even a job. It is okay to cry and mourn that loss because it is real. After working with clients going through a divorce, I noticed they were going through the Five Stages of Grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. These stages do not always go in order and have no set time frame.

4 Tools to Thrive Again

1. Self-care – Get a check-up. Grief puts you at risk of illness due to the increase in stress levels. Be kind to yourself; self-compassion has tremendous healing power. Eat healthy meals, drink plenty of water, get enough sleep (at least 6 hours). Practice relaxation techniques like mediation.

2. Therapy – Start therapy. An objective, expert opinion can help you can deal with the root issues and validate your thoughts and feelings as a confidant.

3. Reflection – Look back at the things that went wrong and let them go. You cannot change the past or who you were before, but you can go forth and choose to make better decisions. When you don’t reflect, the issues seem to remain inside you dormant causing mass confusion in your life.

4. Life Coach – A coach can help you move forward by reassessing your life, goals, and skills. They will determine where you are stuck, give you strategies to move forward, and work on success habits.

After all, life is short. You can’t control how quickly a potential employer calls you back, a break up or the death of a love one; but you can control how you react. Make the best of life, taking care of you is the most important.