“They won’t like it. What if they judge me for being too x,y,z…. It’s not good enough…. I’ll upset him if I say what I really think. They won’t like me…”
Ever find yourself saying things like this?
As a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser, I used to say things like this all the time! But it wasn’t serving me. It was keeping me small and stuck. I was almost frozen in inaction as I wanted everything to be perfect.
Yet I had so much to share with the world! And I wanted my business to grow. But with limited action it wasn’t. But you know that the more I started taking those baby steps, and daring to do it my way, the easier and more freeing it’s become! In my life and business.
I am me. I am doing my very best from where I am with what I have. And that is way more than enough. No ifs or buts. It’s okay. I’m okay no matter what in all areas of my life. And so are you.
Most of what we think is mind reading. We guess what others are thinking or what they might say. It’s usually not true. We build up a whole story made up from all our fears of what might happen.
In fact, when we do put something new out there or dare to do things differently. And we hit publish or say the words. We typically get a much better reaction, response, or result than we ever could have imagined.
***You are perfectly imperfect***
No matter if it’s not perfect. It’s okay. It’s out there. You’re a human being. Perfectly imperfect. The more you do speak your truth and be true to you the more the energy flows. And the more abundance, love, success, happiness… you can receive.
***Put yourself in the other person’s shoes***
A great tip if you are worrying about what people will think of you if you say, do or b x,y or z is to re-frame it. For example, say you are worried about hitting publish on a new controversial blog post or putting your new programme out there.
Before you build it up in your head and worry about what others will think i.e. mind reading. Instead put yourself in the shoes of the people who really need your help. The person you are speaking to or the other person in the situation.
Imagine they are seeing what you are doing. What would they say? What would they hear? What would they feel? What would they say about you? Most likely — it’s great she’s saying what she really thinks, putting something out there. It’s good! Maybe I can do it too. If she can do it why can’t I….
***Focus on Service***
Taking the focus off yourself and whether you are going to do a good enough job is also very powerful. Focus instead on being of service.
Ask: How can I be of service today? How is what I am offering or sharing going to help those who really need it? And continue to bring more love into everything you do.
So today I dare you to hit publish on that blog post, do that live stream you’ve been meaning to do forever, show case your new programme. Ditch the perfection and paint a new picture!
Get out there and make the difference in the world that you know you can. Get the energy flowing. Your perfect clients are waiting for you — you need to show them you’re there, ready and waiting!
And remember you’ve got this!
Much Love Claire xxx
Originally published at medium.com