Community//

How to stop hating your self.

And start loving you.

“I hate myself.”

Three words that keep you in the daily struggle, the constant pain, the never ending shame.

And the reason why is because you keep fighting against you.

Who you are.

And you are not a self.

Your self is a thought you learned to think about you.

An image of who you think you should be.

An image that constantly needs to be maintained.

An image that constantly needs to be improved.

Your self is your own thought about you.

Of how you think you need to be.

In order to be accepted.

In order to be approved.

In order to be loved.

Even by you.

Which is why you no longer know who you are anymore.

Because you keep thinking you need to be something other than who you are.

You keep thinking you need to be someone other than you.

And you are not a thought.

You simply constructed a thought in your mind of who you think you should be.

Which is why you no longer know what it means to be you.

Who you are.

Because the self is not real.

It is a mental illusion.

A false ideal.

An unrealistic expectation.

An unrealistic expectation you created about you.

From all the expectations your parents had of you.

From all the rules society expected of you too.

Which made you think you could no longer be you.

Who you are.

Which is why you hate your self right now.

Because your self is not you.

Because even you know you don’t want to be anyone else.

Other than you.

Because you know it is only natural to be who you are.

Because you feel it too.

When you are allowed to just be you.

Who you are.

Not who you think you should be.

Which is why you feel tired all the time.

Because it is tiring to pretend to be something other than who you are.

Why you feel exhausted too.

Because it is exhausting to pretend to be someone other than you.

And why you feel split.

Divided.

Uneasy.

And uncomfortable too.

Because your self is not you.

Your mind simply got conditioned to think.

Think about you.

So this is how you identify with who you are too.

As a self.

And how you learned to think there is actually such thing as a “best self.”

How you learned to think there is actually such thing as a “better version of you.”

Which is why you feel stuck right now.

Because you are.

You are stuck in your own thoughts about you.

And the cycle of thoughts never ends.

Until you understand how you are not a thought.

You simply are.

And you are already you.

Because your “best self” is you.

Your “authentic self” is simply who you are.

Who you have always been too.

You simply got trapped inside all of your thoughts so you could no longer see it.

You simply got boxed into an image of a self so you could no longer see it for you too.

See what your thoughts are doing.

See what your own thoughts are doing to you.

Which is why you feel lost right now.

Because you are.

You are lost in all your thoughts.

Thoughts that make you think you are no longer enough.

As you are.

As you already are too.

Which is why you keep looking.

Looking for everything outside of you.

Your worth.

Your approval.

Your meaning.

You.

And why you never find what you are looking for.

Because when you are in a thought, you are no longer here.

Because you are in a thought.

Thoughts limit.

Your own thoughts limit you.

To a role.

A label.

A thought about you.

Which is why you keep struggling.

Because you keep struggling to be released.

From all the thoughts you learned to think about you.

From all the thoughts someone else made you learn to think about you too.

Thoughts that make you think you are a sinner.

Thoughts that make you think you are damaged.

Thoughts that make you think you are broken.

You’re not.

Your mind simply got conditioned to think this way about you.

Which created this mental image.

So this is how you see you now too.

Which is why you feel stuck.

Because you are.

You are stuck in your own thoughts.

Because when you think of you as a thought, you no longer see all the possibilities too.

Because you are blocked by the thought.

The thought of your self.

And the limitations this self imposes on you.

And all your experiences too.

Your self is false.

Your self is untrue.

Because your self is not being true to you.

Your self is the product of what you think other people want you to do.

Rather than what you want to do for you too.

Your self is the product of years of conditioning that make you think this is how you need to be.

And you actually think this way too.

Yet no one else can see your thoughts.

No one.

Except for you.

Because all people see is their own thoughts about who they think they need to be too.

Which is why your mind can also release these thoughts about you.

Because your mind can do this too.

Your mind can release the thoughts you think about you.

To release you.

Who you are.

Who you have always been too.

From the Understanding.

The Understanding of Who You Are.

And you are enough.

You have always been enough.

Simply being you.

Which is why no one else can be who you are.

No one.

Not one other person.

Because only you can do what only you can do.

Be you.

The reason why you hate your self is because you no longer want to be anyone else too.

You no longer want to be anyone other than you.

***

My name is Isabel Mar and I am your gentle guide back to you. Who you are. Not who you think you should be.

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People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

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