Wisdom//

How to Stop Being Your Own Worst Enemy

Love yourself.


You are beautiful and worthy right now.

I have something to say to you today: ‘You are beautiful and worthy right now!’

No matter what you weigh.

No matter what clothes size you wear.

No matter how much money you do or don’t have in your bank account.

No matter how many clients you have.

Even if you just got upset with your partner or your children.

Even if you don’t have it all figured out.

Even if you are feeling lost or stuck right now.

Even if things aren’t going to plan and you feel like a failure.

I want you to know: You are beautiful and worthy right now! Just because you are.

***I used to be my own worst enemy**

I used to be my own worst enemy. I would judge myself very harshly and nothing was ever good enough.

Particularly when it came to my body shape and my curves. I now love my curves.

Recently however, I started to feel the pressure to be slimmer for my wedding day. And I slipped back into some negative self-talk. Until I recognised the pattern and decided to stand in my own power, confidently as I am.

I am not defined by my weight and my worth is certainly not anything to do with my dress size or anything else I am doing or not doing!

This is something a lot of my clients struggle with. And it makes me sad. We often judge ourselves extremely harshly.

And speak to ourselves like we would never dream of speaking to someone else! Whether it’s about our weight, our abilities, our achievements, or lack of…

Even though we know this type of negative thinking doesn’t serve us, we still do it. It makes everything so much harder.

If you have slipped into negative self-talk or you’re feeling bad about yourself. Here are some powerful ways to feel better about yourself instantly:

***Be your own best friend ***

Start appreciating yourself right now for all the things you are doing well, all the things you love about yourself and for just how far you’ve come.

There is always something you can appreciate about yourself — ask someone to help you if you need to. For example, being a good friend or a good listener. Start small and build on it.

Imagine what your best friend would say to you? And then say it to yourself! I’m sure they would speak encouragingly to you.

When you can take that tone of voice with yourself and treat yourself gently i.e. being your own best friend. You’ll feel a hundred times better and get the energy flowing again.

Remember you are so much stronger and doing so much better than you think.

***Be Thankful for the little things***

Going into gratitude is super powerful. It changes your focus immediately, which changes how you feel about everything.

Start by being thankful for the small things — the cup of coffee you’re drinking, the sun shining or the beautiful clothes you are wearing and how much your body does for you.

I like to start with gratitude every day — first being thankful for my lovely warm bed and the roof over my head. Other examples include the juicy apple you got to eat, or the lovely chat you had with your friend.

What are you most grateful for today?

***Notice what is going well***

It’s easy to focus on what’s not going well or what we haven’t done. And feeling bad about ourselves because we think we should have done more. But changing your focus to all the things that are going well and what you have done.

Makes it so much easier to keep moving slowly forwards. First ditch the ‘shoulds’! Everything is unfolding perfectly for you with divine timing and you are divining supported always.

You are exactly where you need to be right now.

Write down three things every night that show things are unfolding perfectly for you and show how supported you are: You got new work, you met someone who helped you out, you felt better, you went for a lovely walk or made progress on a project you’re working on.

***Everything you need is already inside***

Finally, trust that everything you need is already inside. There is nothing more that you need or nothing you need to do or to stop doing.

You are naturally confident. That real confidence comes from your solar plexus. It is not attached to outcomes or things happening in a certain way.

You can choose to be okay and stand in your own power no matter what.

You are beautiful just because you are. You need to know it and start believing it.

You are enough. You are worthy.

You can choose to stop being your own worst enemy.

And instead, choose to start appreciating and loving yourself now for everything you are.

What will you choose?

Originally published at medium.com

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