We say we want it all, and yet we can be our worst enemies. We stand in our own way and then wonder why we have not attained what we desire. Knowingly or not, we become accustomed to our self-sabotaging, living the life we have created, not the life we say we want.
As a casting director, I repeatedly watch many actors step in the way of their own success. In a highly competitive industry where just getting an audition is beating the odds, they come to the audition ill-prepared, running late or distracted. Thinking they can wing it, they enter the audition in a compromised state diminishing the chance of doing well. Afterward, they may leave downtrodden or explain to me why they were caught off guard.
While life is full of unexpected twists and turns, how we handle them is an indication of our personal growth. Taking responsibility for our actions is a sign that transformation is indeed happening.
Transformation is not an easy nor effortless path. It takes desire, diligence, and self-awareness to grow and to change.
We often unintentionally lie to ourselves. We say we want something or to accomplish something and yet there is a niggling feeling that prevents us from going for it. Somewhere, something is holding us back from taking the necessary steps to achieving our goals. In our heart of hearts, we know… we are the obstacle.
Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free
~Robert Tew
5 Ways to Be More Or How To Step Out of Our Own Way
1. Change Thought Patterns: Habitual thoughts can hold us back from achieving the success we want. Thoughts with the underlying feelings of “I am not good enough, I am a fraud, I am not deserving, I shouldn’t or I couldn’t” are patterns that are best broken. Modifying our inner critic, to help rather than to hinder, is a start. Become aware when our thoughts are negative self-talk and replace those thoughts with ones which move us closer to our goals.
2. Fear can stop us dead in our tracks. And although healthy fear is necessary, fear of driving too fast or perhaps, fear of a tsunami, fear of failure will stop us before we can even give it a go. Acknowledge the worst that can happen… we fail. So what? Failure is not a bad word. Rethink what failure is. Without our failures, we could never have successes. The greatest inventions in the world started with a series of failures, and someone who would not give up. Pick yourself up and jump back in. Over and over if necessary.
Make Failure Your Fuel
~ Abby Wambach
3. Comparisons are futile. Stop comparing yourself to others. An apple is not an orange. The journey of another has no bearing on the journey of our own. If needed, put blinders on to stop you from looking at someones else’s progress.
4. The company we keep says much about who we are. It can excel our transformation or instead be an anchor to the past. To stay motivated in self-growth it is helpful to be around others that are on the path of personal growth. They can serve as a reminder when we sometimes forget where we are heading and guide us back to the road of self-awareness,
5. Excuses are a by-product of our fears and habitual thought patterns of less. However, the power of thought is enough to change the behavior. If we can catch our excuses of why something cannot be done before they leave our mouths, we are taking steps towards growth..
To Let Go of what holds us back can be complicated, elusive and frightening. In order to become who we want to be, we must Let Go of who we once were.
Are you ready to step out of your comfort zone to become more?