Well-Being//

How To Stay Positive When Life Has You Down

It’s Okay to Not Be Okay.


I think there’s this misconception in society, particularly with the millennial generation, that it’s not okay to be not okay.

Does this conversation sound familiar to you?

Friend: Hey, how’s it going? Long time, no talk!
 
You: Hey! Oh my gosh, I know. Time flies, am I right?!?!?
 
Friend: Tell me about it. So how are you? How’s life? The job?
 
You: It’s great! Super busy, but good! I’m happy! You?
 
Friend: Yeah? That’s great! Busy is good. Same over here. It’s all work, work, work!

Have you ever been the friend? Have you ever been you? I’ve been both. Last week, funnily enough, I was both.

I check in with my friends often. Because I’m living the long distance relationship life with my friends and family because of the military, it’s imperative I check in and see how they’re doing.

I want to know about their triumphs. Did you get a promotion at work? Tell me about it! Do you have fun plans this weekend with friends? Did you reach a fitness goal? I’m all ears.

But I also want to know about the times when you aren’t okay, because those are valid moments of your life too, and they’re worthy of your attention and mine.

The past few days for me have been tough.

I have been beating myself up mentally, saying things that I preach against like “I’m not worthy,” or “I’m not smart enough,” or “Why did I major in theatre and communications?”

Total. And. Complete. Mental. Warfare.

I’ve blogged about career changes here and the fact that military life isn’t always conducive to productivity and success in the significant other’s career. I recognize these things, and I know that you can hustle your way out of them, but sometimes you just get tired.

You know what I mean?

The tiredness that comes from working a job you don’t particularly enjoy where your talents aren’t appreciated, countless cover letters and job searches, or just waking up and thinking to yourself, “Okay, I’m doing this again. Another day. Here we go.

It’s exhausting, right?

I’m someone who will bend over backwards to make sure a person knows they’re worthy. That they are talented and smart and opportunities will come their way with some time, dedication, focus, and patience.

But sometimes I need to bend over backwards for myself and make sure I know that’s true about me too.

Growing up sometimes sucks. Changing careers is never easy. The endless battle between going to grad school or working your way up will go on and on and on until you decide on one and stick with it.

But in the midst of all of this, it’s important to remember that you’re doing the best you can.

You’re going to make it.

You will have great days when you feel on top of the world and carefree, and you will have days when you’re in your head for hours on end and questioning your purpose and skills.

You will have both.

It’s okay to not be okay.

What matters is how quickly you can bounce back and how much you believe that you are intelligent, skilled, important, and worthy.

Keep on keeping on.

You’re going to make it.

Originally published at medium.com

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People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

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