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“How to remain hopeful and support each other.” With Dr. Ely Weinschneider & Marisa Peer

It’s not what happens, it’s how you feel about it. The way you feel about everything, including this virus, is down to the pictures you make in your head and the words you construct. When everything is uncertain and there is little you can control, you can always control your thoughts. Your thoughts control your […]

It’s not what happens, it’s how you feel about it. The way you feel about everything, including this virus, is down to the pictures you make in your head and the words you construct. When everything is uncertain and there is little you can control, you can always control your thoughts. Your thoughts control your feelings, your feelings control your actions and your actions control your events.


As a part of my series about the things we can do to remain hopeful and support each other during anxious times, I had the pleasure of interviewing Marisa Peer.

Named Britain’s best therapist by Tatler magazine, Marisa Peer has spent nearly three decades treating a client list that includes international superstars, CEOs, Royalty, and Olympic athletes. Her engaging and amusing talks are peppered with anecdotes from an unparalleled career in which she has helped thousands of people to overcome profound personal issues.


Thank you so much for joining us Marisa. Our readers would love to get to know you a bit better. Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Do you have a story about how that was relevant in your life?

It’s not what happens, it’s how you feel about it. The way you feel about everything, including this virus, is down to the pictures you make in your head and the words you construct. When everything is uncertain and there is little you can control, you can always control your thoughts. Your thoughts control your feelings, your feelings control your actions and your actions control your events.

You are a person of great influence. If you could start a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂

I am currently creating a program that helps children imagine their cells fighting viruses. It’s a Book, a Song, a Game, an App and a Character. If our children imagine playing a game at being well, they can in turn influence their parents and grandparents to use the power of visualization to boost their immunity and keep their bodies healthier. Our immune system is our line of defense and there are many things we can do to boost our immunity- exercise, deep breathing, better diet and the imagination. When we imagine hea;thy cells we produce immunoglobulin, a protein that helps the body fight viruses. I am very excited about this and think it is going to have a huge impact even after the CV-19 virus is over, i am going to give it to children in hospitals, children with allergies and children with skin conditions.

Ok, let’s now jump to the main focus of our interview. Can you help us see the “light at the end of the tunnel”, of this Covid-19 pandemic?

Human beings need certainty. It is a requirement for our mental and emotional health. We need certainty that we have a job, we have money, we have a relationship and we’re healthy. For so many people this virus has taken their certainty away especially as we don’t know when it’s going to end. Humans can cope with difficulties when they know there is an ending, which right now we don’t have. But this is not as new as we think. We have been here before with 911, the Aids Epidemic, the Gulf war and SARS . They created a similar uncertainty taking us to the same places that caused us to believe that life will never be the same again and yet after each of these horrible experiences life did just about go back to being the same.

Can you share five things that we can do to help and support those around us who are feeling anxious?

1. Remind them that we have been here before and as with other similar situations this will pass and life will go back to normal. How you cope with this is by deciding to give yourself the certainty that is lacking in your life. Get up and get dressed, carry on as normal, live your life as closely as possible to how you lived it before. Do the things that give yourself certainty. When the World is uncertain, you must give yourself certainty. When everything is changing you can stay the same steady constant and reassuring especially to your children and family.

2. Humans react to loss three times more than gain. It is very normal in this current situation to focus on what you’re losing- your freedom, your connection with friends, maybe you are losing your income. When you’re focusing on loss it makes you feel terrible. So, try to focus on gain, what is good about this? Time to yourself, time to meditate, time to workout, learn something new, to bond more with your children, have quality time with your partner. Even if it’s difficult, you must take your mind away from what you’re losing to what you’re gaining. Human beings react very badly indeed to loss and react very well to gain so you must use this to change your focus as much as you can.

3. Change and fear of change are scary to many people unless we can take control of the direction of change in our lives and make it change for the better. Since we can not control the change that is going on in our world, our next option is we must make something good from this change. You have time to learn so many new skills on Youtube and to do something new. And for some of us who may lose our jobs this is the time to learn a new skill- a new marketing skill? An online business? You may never get this enforced time at home again, so you must use it wisely and use it well. Also look at the connections we are making, the care that is being shared and see that as a good change.

4. Be a buddy to your friends. Work out together, do an online yoga class at the same time. Our motivation goes up by 80% when we commit to do something with others. It’s easy to lose our motivation; however if you find a friend to schedule time to do something similar you will be more likely to do it for them and them more likely for you. Exercise boosts your immunity, as well as deep rhythmic breathing. So it’s very important to exercise. If you do not have the space at least do the plank, some sit ups, pushups and some deep breathing.

If you are on your own, which can be immensely difficult because human beings also need connection make sure you always make or get calls and join online communities for quizzes, breakfasts, and dance offs. Use social media to connect and if it’s possible to speak to your neighbors over the fence or down the hall, do that too. Of course the opposite can apply if you’re in a small space with a lot of people, you may feel as though you can not find your space and alone time. Remember that people that are alone, cannot find people. People that have no alone time can find that. If you feel you have no time to yourself, allocate a room in the house where each member gets some private time and their space and the same with the bathroom. Put noise cancelling headphones on to block out other sounds and get lost in audio or get lost in a book or the computer.

5. Do something for someone else. If you have an alone neighbor, connect to them. Doing something for someone else will make you feel so much better. For instance, I am on a website where we are swapping things and giving things away. I just swapped a box of baby wipes for some toilet rolls. I have a lot of facemasks that I am giving away. I am sharing my paddle boards with my neighbors because I live on a Canal. Get that sense of community going, in doing something for other people you will feel better. There is a proverb that says, “To be happy you need someone to love, somewhere to go, something to do”. Love yourself and other people, when you have no other place to go, go inside yourself by meditating and focusing and for something to do, there are hundreds of things to do while in the house and at home.

What is the best way our readers can follow you online?

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/marisa.peer.therapy/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MarisaPeer

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marisa-peer-2a333516/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marisapeertherapy/

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