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How to Reframe and Reset to an awesome life

Are you feeling there has to be more to life than this?

Are you feeling there has to be more to life than this? If this is you, the answer is yes!

Change often seems elusive, lurking around trying to get our attention. You know when something is wrong. Maybe you wake up dreading the day. Perhaps, it is becoming harder to find the energy to get through the day. I understand how you feel, I was there too, not long ago. But one day I was a keynote speaker for a program for students of color entering the communications field. I was as a Vice-President and a Head of Law for a global conglomerate and asked to speak about my career and corporate life. As I looked at the roomful of happy, expectant young faces, I was filled with an odd mixture of elation and sadness. I delivered an inspiring speech and was elated to urge them to be their best. Don’t limit yourself. Be courageous. Live with purpose and passion. But saddened,  that I was not taking my own advice. I was more powerful than what I felt. I didn’t see the ME, they saw. I knew at that moment I needed a change, to get back to real ME.   

I was at the top of my legal and corporate career, received numerous awards, was a regular public speaker and in the current issue of Savoy Magazine as one of the Most influential Black lawyers of 2018, with Eric Holder on the cover. But, over the years, little by little  I limited myself and allowed others to do the same.  I was capable but existing far beneath my potential. I looked to books, podcasts, sermons, conferences, etc. for the motivation to change. But often nothing worked. Why? I was looking for others to do what I  must do myself. I had to reframe my mindset and reset my life.

If this is also you, think about how awesome life can be if you reframed your mind and reset to the life you are meant to have. You don’t need all the answers, but you do need to take action. 

Here are a few of the steps I took: 

  1. Take 10. There are 1,440 minutes in a day. Commit to 10  uninterrupted minutes to think and focus only on you. Try this early in the morning, during your lunch break, or while sitting in the car before you walk in the house. Thinking produces clarity and intentional decision making. 
  2. Stop looking to others, encourage and affirm yourself. You have to become reacquainted with your inner strength. Try prayer and meditation.
  3. Manage your time by setting priorities and making a plan. Brainstorm and research ideas.  Prioritize your actions and create an actionable plan. Stay away from distracting activities.
  4. Declutter your home – a messy home creates anxiety. Get rid of stuff. Donate clothes you can no longer fit it also keeps you feeling bad about yourself. Donate excess household items. A clearer space produces a clearer mind. 
  5. Let go of being and feeling responsible for everyone. If you are enabling friends or family members, stop it. You are hurting them and yourself. 

My journey is still ongoing. But so far, I can once again feel the warmth of the sun on my face. I am present, happy, healthy and living life on purpose. 

Decide today to reframe and reset to an awesome life. I did and you can too.

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People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

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