Imagine how much more effective your social interactions would be if you could read anyone’s “vibe” on the spot.
Want to know who to talk to as you walk into a networking event? Try to decide if you should go on a second date with the charming stranger from Tinder? Want to know how you can best help when your spouse/child seem down? Being able to intuitively read others makes any people-related decision making easier.
I know you’re thinking, “Sounds good. But that seems like a really difficult thing to learn”. Well, what if I tell you it’s actually simple?
I’m an empath. Reading people has always been easy for me. It wasn’t until when I started teaching others how to become more intuitive that I realized there was actually a process for it.
Below I break down this process into four steps for you. Like learning any skill, at first you need to consciously apply the steps to gain competency. But if you keep practicing, you will get better. And one day when you meet someone, it will seem like you “just know” what they are about, effortlessly.
Step 1: Extend and connect
When you meet someone, the first thing you want to do is to extend love, blessing, and goodwill to them. This practice allows you to both establish an energetic connection with them and be free from conscious or unconscious judgments about the person, as much as possible.
I can’t empathize the importance of the latter. Judgment of someone, positive or negative, is enemy #1 to your natural intuition. The more calm and neutral you are about a situation, the easier it would be to follow your intuitive guidance.
You may be thinking, “how exactly do I extend love and blessing to someone? I’ve never done it before!”
But I can assure you that you already know how to do it. You have your own way and your way is the correct way. In fact, think of someone in your life right now and simply extend to them. Do it now…
There you go. If you think you’re doing it, you are.
Step 2: Focus your intent
Ask yourself, “What do I need to know about this person right now?”
This is a deceptively simple, yet very deliberate question. It says you’re asking for information about the person on a “need to know” and “right now” basis.
Why is this important? Because it helps filter the information you may get.
Imagine if you’re searching online for a local hardware store to buy a hammer. Would you just google “hammer”? No. Because then you’d get all sorts of broadly hammer-related information that’s of no use to you. You’d have a much higher chance finding what you need if you search for something more specific, like “hammer store near me”.
Asking for intuitive guidance is similar. Humans are vastly complex creatures. There’s so much information about anyone you meet, most of which has nothing to do with your present relationship with them. Therefore, you want to set the intention to consciously receive only the information that will be useful to you and your current relationship with the person. It will help make any “signal” you get louder and clearer.
Step 3: Listen with curiosity
Center yourself and listen to whatever that comes up. Any thoughts, images, feelings you get related to the person, acknowledge their existence without judgment, even when the information seems ridiculous or unimportant.
For most people, the biggest barrier to becoming more intuitive is developing the trust. We are always receiving intuitive information. Yet most people simply don’t have enough respect for their intuition, quick to dismiss any information they get as illogical, imaginary, or irrelevant.
Rather than outright discounting any information that doesn’t seem to immediately help you, a better attitude is to be curious. Acknowledge what you’re receiving. Say to yourself, “Hmm, this is interesting. I wonder what it means.”
When you trust that you’re getting certain information for a reason, even when the reason is unclear to you, it gradually conditions your subconscious to give you clearer and stronger messages that you feel comfortable acting upon.
Step 4: Observe how you feel
Even though you may feel like you are a solid individual identity, the inter-personal boundary between people is porous. We can all tap into and be affected by the thoughts, emotions, and energies of those around us.
That means if you’re aware enough, you can know exactly what’s going on with someone, simply by observing the thoughts and feelings that come up within you when you’re around them.
To accomplish this, you need to train yourself to discern which thoughts and emotions you experience are your own, and which are what you picked up from other people. The simple acknowledgement that what you’re thinking and feeling at this moment may not totally come from you is a step in the right direction.
The process of intuitively reading people is simple. And if you make an effort to practice it, someday you will find that what seemed like magic is in fact your second nature.
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Natasha Che, PhD is a personal growth teacher and entrepreneur. She helps empathic light beings to thrive in business and life, and make a bigger impact with their gift. She is a contributor to Huffington Post, Entrepreneur, and Elephant Journal. She hosts The True Voyage podcast, an audio training series about inner mastery. She is also the founder of Soundwise, a mobile-centric audio publishing platform for experts and influencers to sell on-demand audios and build an engaged audience community for their podcast.