I believe that behind each person who is presently engaged and dissatisfied with their employment, lies a person who flirts with the possibility of stepping out and creating something different. The issue is how to detach from the routine, structure, pay cheque and the big leap into the unknown.
As this possibility lurks on the horizon, this often invites a desire to plough on and do what needs to be done.
The secret sauce is to awaken a desire to see what lies on the other side of the employment fence.
I coached a client a while back that proved this point so clearly that it made sense to illustrate in this article. I believe it’s imperative to illustrate not merely as a theoretical case, but as a real, living and breathing example.
This clients name is Tina (not her real name), she was creative, smart, tenacious, ambitious and worked as an Accounts Manager at a Marketing Company in the City.
One issue that continued to plague her daily grind, was her need to cling tightly to her employment as an Accounts manager — A role she absolutely loathed. She had instead been preparing to unleash her talents across the globe for quite some time.
This also came with the added issue that she lacked confidence and was plagued with anxiety at the very thought of leaving the ‘security’ of employment and ultimately the £4,000 monthly pay cheque that came with it.
She described herself as stuck when she awakened each morning, dreading the day ahead and the myriad of work stacked up waiting for her. There was not an end in sight to the endless jobs she had to do for her boss who never so much as whispered a thank you.
Tina wanted to unleash her creativity and begin showcasing the beautiful portraits she had so carefully crafted and created in the basement of her flat. Long hours after work, nurturing her passion which she had been so desperate to unveil.
So why did Tina put herself through this endless misery?
Tina viewed her job (or rather the money she received) as this thing called ‘security’, which on the one hand gave her life stability, yet on the other hand, was making her miserable.
So what made Tina ditch her concept of security in less than 6 weeks?
Tina engaged a coach to support her with getting clarity over what was keeping her in this dead-end endeavour of a job, she realised the pay was not conducive to being able to save for her future. The hours were long, uninterrupted, and by the time she got home, her mood was so low, that her creative buzz was sapped.
So how did Tina transition from being employed, to ditching her boss with no regrets in 6 weeks?
1) Moving from Passive to Active
The passive (victim) mindset can be absolutely paralysing, and the first thing to do is to unhook from this mindset. Tina changed the phrase ‘I have to’ and replaced it with ‘I choose to’. She was essentially choosing to stay in her job, but in contrast, she could also choose to leave.
Waking up to this fact was huge, somewhat like standing up at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting declaring you’re an Addict. It moves you from confusion to clarity.
This was crucial when attempting to get in touch with what she wanted. Tina began to get clarity about who she was and where she wanted to head to, and it certainly wasn’t towards the Accounts Department she worked at.
2) Moving from paralysis to Manifesting
Leading on from her dance class, Tina began attending art exhibitions as well as joining networking events with people who were doing exactly what she wanted to do. She began stepping into the climate of change and possibility as she saw others doing the same.
3) Moving from Hopelessness to possibility
Tina created a Facebook page showcasing her artwork and by sharing this with friends and contacts, she could really see how much interest she was awakening. In return, this began to build her confidence and she slowly generated and built a following. She even sold a small number of her portraits.
4) Moving from Helplessness to Support
She asked an old friend from University, to prepare a budget sheet for a 6-month time frame so that she could establish if she had enough money to cover her costs up to this point. She reluctantly involved her father, who agreed to support her beyond those 6 months if need be.
Tina also contacted a gallery owner she had met at a networking event and asked if she could work part-time at his gallery. This would benefit her twofold, a part-time salary and good solid contacts and experience in the art world.
He agreed to give her a 4-week trial.
Her mindset was shifting, and slowly, so was her life.
Having kickstarted the above, her comfort zone began to expand and she became more familiar with this thing called ‘the unknown’. She felt a tingle of excitement. She had prepared for the showdown and finally quit her job.
The moment of quitting any aspect of life which is just not conducive to our growth, whether it’s a job, smoking, alcohol, gambling or relationships, needs only one factor.
You’re own personal lightbulb moment of insight and 6 weeks to shift the mindset, once this had shifted the possibilities are endless.
This example of a client illustrates the role of a mentor and coaches ability to tap clients on the shoulder metaphorically, and awaken them to the potential and possibilities available. Letting this ferment, brew and filter through. This is the only method that ultimately creates long-lasting change and transformation.
It is within this safe space that clients declare they are absolutely ready for transition, transformation and change.
Originally published at www.micheleattiascoaching.com