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How to deal with energy suckers

Negative people will suck the joy out of your life and leave you feeling drained and discouraged. You should learn how to deal with them so that you do not end up like them. You don’t have to be cross or unfriendly, but keep your cool and protect yourself. It’s not easy to deal with […]

Negative people will suck the joy out of your life and leave you feeling drained and discouraged. You should learn how to deal with them so that you do not end up like them. You don’t have to be cross or unfriendly, but keep your cool and protect yourself.


It’s not easy to deal with negative people who suck the energy from you, especially if they are friends or relatives. However, you have to put your feet down and deal with them to save yourself. In this article, I will show you tips to deal with such energy-sucking people and reserve yourself.

Learn to recognize them

Recognize an energy sucker when you see one if you want to remain immune to their negativity. Once you know them, you will be careful in how you deal with them and preserve your relationship as you also shield yourself from the damaging energy. On the contrary, if you don’t identify them, you will find yourself becoming like them or slowly being sucked in their destructive cycle.

Minimize contact

Because these energy suckers are people you interact with and you even care about, you cannot completely shut them out of your life. The thing to do, therefore, is to reduce your contact with them. Meet them only when you have to and even then keep your meetings short. This will ensure you still show them that you care, but you are exposing yourself to minimal side effects of their negativity.

Set limits with them

Let the energy suckers know the extent to which they can vent out to you. Make it clear to them that you are not willing to be dragged down their energy-sucking drain. You can for example tell an energy sucker that they only have one more chance to send you their sorry broken heart messages and if they send them to you again you are going to block them entirely. If you do this, they will be careful about what they say in your presence. This way you won’t have to be on the receiving end of their negativity.

Listen without contributing

Listen to the energy vampire without contributing anything to their sorry stories. This way they will read your mood and talk about something else. At the same time, not responding to them will let them know you don’t wish to be drawn into their negativity.

Divert the conversation

When a negative person starts their sorry stories just change the topic and talk about something pleasant. Each time they talk about a negative thing, don’t tire of talking about something positive. Ultimately, they will get the cue and start talking about positive stuff as well.

Learn to let it go

Learn not to be so burdened by the negative person’s talks but instead, learn to release them and the way their negativity affects you. This will help you because if you keep at heart what the negative person said or their attitude to life, you will become worn out.

Hang out in a group

Instead of meeting with the energy sucker alone, get together with them in a group. This way, there will be several people to absorb the negative energy as well as talk about something else. The group might also have someone who will be able to tell them off politely.

Help them get counseling

Many people who are always negative and discouraged need professional help. Because of being worn down by issues, they might not even be able to get help or realize they need it. You should, therefore, set to help them out by getting them help. Take them to a qualified therapist who will listen to them and give them advice.

Listen to them

Energy suckers are mostly lonely people, and therefore the person they are close to gets to hear all their negative stories. Listening to them might sound counterintuitive but it’s actually good for them. It might be that they have been holding on to their stories for long and they need to vent. If this is the case and you give them space to do it, they will feel relieved and you will also be safe from their negativity because they have let it out and are done with it.

Cut them off your life

If you try everything you can to help the energy sucker and keep them in your life, it’s time to cut ties with them because if you don’t, you will end up like them. This should be a last resort because you don’t want to kick them out of your life but to help them. However, if you have tried to change them and help them in vain, you have no other choice but to run for your life.

The take away

Energy vampires may be your relative, friend, or coworker, and you are probably wondering how you are going to deal with them without hurting their feelings. You don’t want to alienate them and make them feel bad but you want to retain your energy and productivity. You should, therefore, give them a listening ear, help them get help, hand out in a group, let go of their negativity, recognize the energy suckers, listen without saying a thing, minimize contact set limits and change their topics.

The tips above will help you deal with them and remain close as before without having to cut ties completely. This will ensure you maintain a working relationship with them without turning into an energy sucker yourself. If you have to, stop associating with them totally if it’s the last option you have.

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