Relationships aren’t always easy, however, they are often made harder by a lack of communication. This is essential in cases of arguments. Whether it’s about money, personal values, or a need for something in the relationship, communication is often at the heart of the issue.

Communication starts with a mindset. We are a team. If you get in an argument with your significant other and you go into it thinking of your loved one on the other side, you will almost never come out ahead. Instead try approaching these issues with a sense of “This is the situation, we should work together to build a solution.”

By the way, if you need some support on your marriage, I offer a free call to help you clarify things- schedule it here.

Sometimes arguments get messy and communication goes out the window. To solve this set up rules you can both agree to at the start of the discussion. Here are some examples:

  • No inappropriate language.

  • No name calling.

  • Start claims with “I feel like…” so that it feels less like an attack on the other person.

  • No interrupting.

Sometimes not all of these are possible but its important to make sure the other one feels understood and not attacked. This applies not just to arguments but to everyday conversations.

Communication is important outside of disagreements as well. Building communication now can even make arguments easier to handle in the future. Here is how to build communication outside of arguments:

  • Ask how the other’s day was and be sure to listen.

  • When making plans make sure the other person knows about it.

  • Give them 100% attention when they are talking to you. This means no playing games on your phone when they are telling you something.

Communication is an important part of relationships, the good and the bad times, so make sure you and your partner know you can talk to each other openly and work together as a team to build better communication in your relationship.

Originally published at www.coachingbykelly.com