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How I almost puked before launching my second book!

This is why we are terrified when we get out of our comfort zone.

Terrified,

feeling giddy,

feeling nausea,

hands shaking,

a bit of sweating and

a rush of negative thoughts running in my head at a super high speed!

Yes, this is how I felt before letting the world know about my second book “Heart Fool of Love and Life” which is my first ever collection of poetry and prose for the Lovers and for the Dreamers aka Creatives and Entrepreneurs.

What if they hate it?

What if noone buys it?

What if noone reads it?

What if they judge me?

What if they get the whole point of this Wrong or totally opposite to my intention?

What if I am bashed for expressing so boldly?

What if I am criticized for being too vulnerable and unapologetic?

What if… what if…. what if..

And all this was happening inside of me, for well two, two and a half hours.

I tried binge watching some kickass mentors of mine to own my power back,

I also tried listening to their podcasts, but it felt like nothing was working and my ego aka fear was working very well that day winning over my intention to choose love instead of fear!

But why do we feel like that when we try to get out of our comfort zone?

Why do we feel like that when we are doing something new?

Why do we feel like that when we are putting ourselves out there, in front of the world sharing our truth, sharing our message, sharing our story?

Its because WE ARE DOING THE RIGHT DAMN THING!

The thing we are doing is so right, that our “Ego mind” as A Course in Miracle says, is TRIGGERED.

Its because we are choosing to lean towards Love instead of our fears and negative emotions!

There were even thoughts at that moment, of maybe I should just UNPUBLISH my book and let it stay in my Google drive forever! I mean what bigger shame than that!

As I am writing this, I have a big smile on my face, of how irrelevant my ego’s voice was! The very message of my book is “Life is to Express and not to Impress” and ironically I was getting caught up in that “Impressing-the-world circus”. 

I had written those poems from my soul, for me first!

Yes, I always create something as an artist as an expression of what’s going on inside of me, what I need to hear at a particular point in time, what I need to teach myself first and to work on myself! 

It is in my healing that the world is being healed! This was the purpose of our soul work always! 

It’s funny how our ego, still manages to Trigger us, day in and day out and the fact that we now easily recognize it but still aren’t able to permanently deal with it! But that is what life is about! Learning every single day, through our experiences and to improve ourselves! 

For we are just Work-in-progress in the project called “Life”.

P.S– Have you grabbed “Heart Fool of Love and Life?‘ yet? Is it one of my bestest creations ever! Click on the link or simply search by name on your Amazon Store.

Did anyone say book trailer? Here it is!!

Do not forget to leave me a review on Amazon after you have finished experiencing HFLL! Enjoy your read!

Lots of love,

Bansi!

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