No one creates alone. Life happens to us, we engage our thought process and end up with an insight. But something has to be the instigator, an experience, a person — be it a loved one or someone we would consider an unpleasant being — both can deeply inspire and instigate this thought process of ours. So we don’t create alone.
Here I want to especially mention our loved ones, our partners, and more precisely — my partner. I actually gave her a nick name — she is now “Holly Father”. It’s started from me watching this new HBO show Young Pope with Jude Law, which I think is the most provocative while utterly beautifully shot series I have seen in a while, tackling a subject like religion and the church in such a new and fresh way while remaining deeply rooted in something intransient — God’s love, whatever God might be to you or any one of us — even the atheists. So while watching the show Jude Law develops from an ugly duckling pope that everyone hates into a much revered saint loved by all, and everyone addresses him with Holly Father. So since I often discuss various topics on my mind with my girlfriend, I noticed that she has the same quality that Jude Law has — that of quiet presence and internal power and that when she speaks and gives her take on things, it sheds such clarity as it’s deeply felt but also logically executed — the epitome of wisdom. So I started calling her Holly Father and when I need her help I say, Holly Father I need to ask you something in the same accent as the actors do it in that series with an Italian accent, and we laugh together about it.
Sometimes I admire her so much as she has this ability to synthesize a solution in just a few words while it takes me a lot of talking out loud to get to the same point. Of course our starting points in life were not the same and nor are our characters, so it’s not unusual that we come to similar conclusions in different ways. And on occasion she delivers such clarity which I could truly never reach that I stop and am in awe of her being and her comprehension of the world. My girlfriend is dyslexic and she was really bad at school, even repeating a few grades as she found it difficult to read and learn by reading. No one at that time knew anything about dyslexia and she was scolded for being a bad student and even told she was stupid. However, her wisdom comes from life, from interaction with people, from keen observation and an ever so intelligent brain with capacity for great wisdom and love. And had I not pursued coaching, and asked her as many questions as I do often, we would never get to the gold sitting deep inside her, as she is quite recluse and keeps her thoughts mostly to herself.
So what wondrous experience life is, so non-linear and unplanned, and gifting us opportunities for growth and evolution in places we would not necessarily expect. And I want to tell you, open up to these opportunities around you, open up to different styles of learning and processing knowledge, information and experiences so that the width of life can be captured in our coaching work and we do not remain forever caged by our analytical mind — bless its soul for its capacity, but let it rest when needed — and hear other voices, ask other people then the ones you think have all the answers and you will be deeply surprised and you will be in awe. You might find a Holly Father somewhere in your vicinity ready to teach you and take you on a journey you were not expecting in a thousand years.
Originally published at medium.com