There is a famous saying that you are only as successful as your five closest friends. While there is a lot of truth in that statement, I also believe there needs to be some clarity in that statement too. We miss the point when we make that blanket statement.
What point are we missing?
Think about your closest friends. Most high-level entrepreneurs will tell you they really don’t have “friends” only “business friends” to which the statement rings true. Some people can mix their friends and their business associates together, yet they will only go so deep.
The point being made is, your ‘circle of five’ is best when you have multiple circles of five.
5 closest Family members
5 closest Friends
5 closest Finance Makers (business colleagues)
5 closest Fun-to-be-around people
Now, certainly you may have some overlay inside these four groups, which is fine and some cases essential or unavoidable, but we miss the mark when we think of success only in financial terms. Another way to frame this is to simplify your five closest into two groups – the high minded and the like-minded.
It is important, critical, and essential that we have like minded people in our lives. These are the people who can speak into our lives. They are the ones we go deep with regularly. These are the people who share similar (if not almost the same) foundational beliefs, ethics, values, and morals. These are the people you call when your spouse wants to leave you, your parents just got the terminal illness diagnosis, or those who you share your fears that your business is failing, and you don’t know what to do.
Like minded circles are who keep you sane. They are the ones that you can hang with for multiple days and not say one word about business and it’s ok. They are who you first think of to invite to a family gathering. This is the group of people who when you have conflict with you fight like heck to repair the relationship and if or when you can’t you agonize over it. Then, there is another group…
This group of people are primarily in your business circles. When coaches, speakers, and consultants direct you to surround yourself with high caliber people or those who are one step beyond you, this is the group they are referring to. Sometimes access only comes after investing in a high level, high priced mastermind. They are not often your friends (at least not at first) and the relationship is “strictly business.”
These are the people who will push you towards greatness. They will spur you into deep levels of personal and professional development. They are the ones who will celebrate your financial successes and your business platforms and positions. They are the ones we look up to and strongly desire to connect with and – or be connected to.
High minded people are going to shoot straight at you at times and it will hurt but because they want to see you grow and develop you may not see that until you reach the other side. They are as important, crucial, and essential as like-minded people (which is one reason why there is overlap).
Closing The Gap
Quite simply, most like-minded people are operating at your level and most high-level people won’t be at your children’s birthday parties. You can have both. In fact, you should have both. You should have some overlay between the two as well as separatism.
Both serve a purpose to help you grow deeper and to thrive further. Knowing the difference, appreciating the difference, and seeking out the different type of people will result in you being well rounded, well supported, and well positioned.