When you give birth to a child, your life changes forever. You immediatly think differently about things. Things you never thought of before suddenly are first in line. Your priorities change. You think about your own mother and finally appreciate her! The happiness that you feel when you hold that child compares to nothing else. You are their protector, their playmate, their world and they are yours!
Your main purpose in life is to love them, teach them and to keep them safe. You put gates up, lock cabinets, schedule play dates, choose healthy meals, give them a bath, take them to school and take care of their medical needs. You drive them to sporting events, music and dance lessons. You fix their boo-boo’s and wipe their tears. The hopes and dreams you have for them are endless.
When your child, your flesh and blood, this child that you’ve loved and taken care of in every way humanly possible has succumbed to drug addiction, it’s hard to fathom what went wrong. You wonder why it happened. When did it start? Why didn’t you see it! You beat yourself up emotionally and take full blame. I’m telling you that it’s not your fault!
So the battle begins. This war that’s so hard to win. It takes over your entire being. You and your family are now in for the fight of your lives. It’s a debilitating way of living, but this is now your existence. You do everything you can to find treatment, be supportive, to not be judgmental and to get them well.
You’re hopefully one of the lucky ones whose child has found recovery and fought their way back to you, to themselves, but sadly, it’s not always a happy ending.
For today, I’m blessed. My family and I are one of the lucky ones. I can call my daughter and know that she’ll answer the phone or she’ll get right back to me. She has a full time job, health insurance an apartment and a car. I get a Mother’s Day card from her every year. I go to the movies and laugh with her again. She’s reunited with her sisters after a really long road toward forgiveness and trust. That sparkle is back in her eyes and she has a key to our house again!
For all the Mothers out there who belong to this club that we didn’t want to be in, who are celebrating the big and small accomplishments and wins, who are fighting for their child to be well, who are praying for them, crying for them, who had to bury them. I stand with you in spirit and feel your every emotion.
I strive to advocate and find solutions to help reduce mental health issues and overdose deaths. Let’s work together and use evidenced based prevention options and recovery options in hopes that no other family has to endure this pain.
This Mothers Day, I truly wish you love, prayers, hope and peace.