Community//

Handling Criticism

‘Positive criticism’, Being ‘good sports’, Critics choice awards …. All terms we have used to spin criticism in a positive light. Let’s be real though, when you are on the receiving end of the criticism —- it’s not that easy being vulnerable. Sometimes it hurts, and while it could be helpful, let’s face it, some […]

‘Positive criticism’, Being ‘good sports’, Critics choice awards …. All terms we have used to spin criticism in a positive light. Let’s be real though, when you are on the receiving end of the criticism —- it’s not that easy being vulnerable. Sometimes it hurts, and while it could be helpful, let’s face it, some criticisms are pointless.

My brothers teased me endlessly (as a kid) about how defensive I was when criticized, they called me ‘Voltron’ lol. It’s still not easy to be criticized but I have learned some lessons on handling criticism.

Here are some of my quick tips

Remember this very important note: A criticism doesn’t define you. It doesn’t predict how successful you would be. It’s just an opinion. It’s feedback that you can choose to give power to … or not. So don’t take it personal, ever. Just use it. Like a tool.

Develop the right mindset to deal:

  • Always remind yourself that everyone has an opinion and while you are not in control of what they think or say, you are in control of what to accept/receive and how to respond.
  • You are responsible for protecting yourself. The same way you wouldn’t let any random person come in and take a dump in your room, don’t let that happen to your mind.
  • Be open minded and willing to learn, and treat criticism as a drive/force for excellence.

Consider the source of the criticism:

  • Is this coming from someone you trust? Someone that cares about you?
  • Is this coming from someone that is qualified to give that kind of feedback? Someone you care about their opinion?
  • Is the delivery framed to hurt or help?

Receive (or reject) accordingly: With the analysis, mindset and source as anchor, follow the decision path below to handle criticism

  • Is it true? (No – reject and keep it moving. Yes – Move to next question)
  • Is there something to learn? (No – reject and keep it moving. Yes – Next question)
  • Is there value in what you learned (No – reject and keep moving. Yes – Accept and apply as needed)

We are vulnerable beings and its natural to care about what others think, but I find that with the right mindset, an open mind, good sense of humor and practicing the above, I am learning to ignore and reject things that kill my spirit while recognizing how and when best to turn criticism into victories.

Adaeze

The Thrive Global Community welcomes voices from many spheres. We publish pieces written by outside contributors with a wide range of opinions, which don’t necessarily reflect our own. Learn more or join us as a community member!
Share your comments below. Please read our commenting guidelines before posting. If you have a concern about a comment, report it here.

You might also like...

Community//

How to Cope With Criticism

by Stephanie Wells
Courtesy of Andrii Yalanskyi / Shutterstock
Community//

How to Overcome the Fear of Being Criticized

by Jonathan Alpert
MicroStockHub/Getty Images
Wisdom//

How to Stop Paying Attention to Your Critics

by Meg Myers Morgan, PhD

Sign up for the Thrive Global newsletter

Will be used in accordance with our privacy policy.

Thrive Global
People look for retreats for themselves, in the country, by the coast, or in the hills . . . There is nowhere that a person can find a more peaceful and trouble-free retreat than in his own mind. . . . So constantly give yourself this retreat, and renew yourself.

- MARCUS AURELIUS

We use cookies on our site to give you the best experience possible. By continuing to browse the site, you agree to this use. For more information on how we use cookies, see our Privacy Policy.