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We Either Get Bitter or Get Better

Life is a series of choices - especially through life’s intense moments.


Life is a series of choices – our choices. 

Speak to anyone who has gone through a storm in life, and they’ll tell you its a life-changing experience – I’m no exception! 

Five years ago, our storm ended. Five years prior, my husband and I became conservators for my mother’s health, during one of the most stressful times in our entrepreneur life. At that time, we were at the beginning of a five-year fight with our bank in hope to save our building materials business during a time when the economy and the housing market collapsed. In the end, we lost our fight, along with our “forever” home, our business of over 27 years, and both of our incomes. By 2013, we’d also lost my mother, father, my aunt, cousin and my father-in-law to failed health the final two years of that fight. Dark times. Lot’s of pain. (More about that story here)

When life unfolds events in a cluster of chaos, we find ourselves challenged, overwhelmed, fearful, in pain, and sometimes broken to the circumstances. It’s understandable that we can become stuck in emotion as we process what’s happened to us and weather the storm. 

Every day, we face a series of choices that mold who we are: choices with food, exercise, relationships, family, career. Sometimes, though, we’re faced with difficulties in life. Problems with finances, relationships, health or even death of a loved one or two. 

What happens then? 

Do the choices we make during and after those dark, difficult times mold and forever change us after the ordeal has passed? I believe so. When we’re afraid of our emotions, memories, or beliefs – they control us. Yet, when we confront those things, we prove to ourselves evidence that we’ll survive.

We cannot control when the storms of life hit, but we can control how we respond to what happens to us in life. We can choose to allow these events in life to change us into someone bitter or someone better. 

Experiencing such a storm awakened a knowing within me. 

Whatever the circumstance, we have a choice to get bitter about what life throws at us or to get better – better at dealing with frustration or disappointment, better at finding the positive of the situation, better at taking care of our health during stressful times.

Maybe you own a business and one day you find out your line of credit will no longer be honored by the new bank that bought out your bank as we did. Maybe you lose your job overnight. Maybe unexpected expenses happen with a car repair or the washer and dryer go out. Maybe your relationship is going through a rough patch right now? 

Whatever it is, please know you will get through it! 

You will not be in this place forever, and although it may feel like you are alone in your quest, there are others in your life willing to lend an ear or a hand during your time of need. Don’t let the negativity of the situation consume you or close you off from the world. You may become bitter or resentful and wonder why these things happen to you. It may feel as though you are the only one to which bad luck happens and no one else has to go through the struggles you’re facing. But the truth is, we all struggle with adversity at some time in our life. We have things we are dealing with daily, weekly, monthly- it’s a part of life. 

It’s the part of life that builds character, brings us strength when we didn’t think we had any more, offers us gifts of lessons learned (even if we cannot see what those gifts are in the moment). I believe there is always something meant for us to learn – everything is learning if we allow it.

Will you choose to take a ride on the bitter train – you know; the train that gathers all your woes, all your negativity and makes its stops along the tracks of life complaining, talking negatively to self, making excuses, being bitter. Or will you choose to be on the bliss train? The train that allows you to change your perspective, find something to learn about yourself from the situation and expect things to get better instead of waiting for things always to go wrong. 

When we choose to get through each day with purpose, we focus our energy on trusting things will work out and shifting our thoughts to manifest the best of the situation. 

In my experience, trusting and having faith will bring you better off than you ever were before that life circumstance. Again, some things are simply not in our control. When we stop trying to have all the answers and stop sending our minds into a scavenger hunt by asking “why”, we can quiet the mind and open the gift.

Our energy attracts.

Wherever we focus our attention most, becomes the driving force in our lives.

Often, it’s difficult to see how dilemmas in life can bring something good in the future. Yet, I’ve found this adage to be true; when windows close, doors open. The trick is being open to seeing those doors and taking a step-through. If you want to have control over your life, you’ve got to unlock the door. 

We get to work on becoming better with our reactions, our thought processes, our beliefs. We learn we have the ability to pull through tough times, discover our strength, overcome fear, and trust everything will work out. Once you realize you have the power to evoke change, you know better. 

Staying in the negative is a choice, being bitter and staying on the bitter train is your choice. Being diligent and working through to work out of the situation is also your choice. 

The better the outlook gets, the better you’ll get. Soon, you’ll be transitioning yourself from the initial shock of the situation to becoming better at dealing with life’s intense moments and recovering faster. 

Allow yourself the confidence and belief to positively change your outlook, no matter what life throws at you. The choice is yours: you can choose to either get bitter and let life get you down, or get better and rise above!

Need a helping hand on where to begin learning more about shifting patterns and beliefs that no longer serve you, stepping outside your comfort zone, and up-leveling your life? Connect with Michele at www.innerstrengthandbeauty.com and become a part of her Up-Level Tribe.

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