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Finding Your Why

Learn to love the process rather than seeking happiness in the end goal

I was first introduced to the notion of finding your why from a good friend who told me about Simon Sinek and The golden Circle. If you’ve not heard of him please check out his TEDTalk on this subject before reading further. Sinek discusses that without knowing and understanding why you do what you do you won’t find true fulfilment and therefore, can quickly lose your passion, as he did

He created what’s now known as The Golden Circle where you first have to establish why you do what you do, or why you want to it before knowing how to do it and what it, essentially is

“Once you know your why everything else falls into place”

I recently engaged in a LinkedIn post by Gen Z Speaker, Franki Johnson (side note: this girl is changing perceptions around Gen Z’s and is someone I find hugely inspiring!) where she discusses why it’s important to understand how important social media is to Gen Z’s, likening it to a dog with a ball “Take it away and he becomes bored”. She then goes on to discuss Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs and how many people today reach the dizzying heights of self-esteem and actualisation without really laying the foundations of security, safety, love and belonging; and so become lost and unfulfilled, which can lead to mental health issues such as depression and potentially suicide

It sounds extreme but it’s actually very true and I think we can see the comparisons between Sinek’s Golden Circle and Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Both require us to lay a solid foundation before moving to the next step. Sinek states that without first understanding your “why”, you cannot effectively do what you want to do because you don’t know how. This can ultimately lead to a lack of fulfilment and low self-esteem. Maslow is similar in that without first establishing what it is that makes you feel secure, safe and connected you cannot truly experience positive self-esteem and actualisation

Most people go about things the wrong way round by trying to achieve what they believe to be success in the hope that it will then provide them with happiness. It can take many of us a lifetime to discover that we first of all need to find the happiness in order to reach success

Many successful people enjoy the journey and we’re often told that “happiness is a journey, not a destination”. Admittedly, the penny has only recently dropped for me in understanding what this truly means. Rather than being solely focused on the end goal of success, money, fame or whatever it is you want; it’s about finding enjoyment in the process that gets you there

I’ve always been passionate about the Beauty Industry. I was fortunate enough to know that I wanted to do it after my first massage when I was only 13. I realised in that 30 minutes of utter relaxation how powerful a persons touch could be, and I knew there and then that I wanted to have that power. I wanted to make a difference to someone’s day or life even, through the power of touch. So, I did my research and as soon as I was in my final year of school I applied to my local colleges to enrol on a NVQ L2 course in Beauty Therapy

I’m 34 this month, which means I’ve been qualified for 16 years. It feels like a lifetime that flew by in the blink of an eye. I have achieved so much in 16 years that I often don’t take the time to really appreciate it all. I was one of the first therapists in the UK to train in the now world famous St. Tropez Airport Tan; I’ve travelled to some of the most beautiful Spa locations, performed massages right beside the Ionion Sea and Pacific Ocean; I’ve shared my passion through educating the next generation of budding therapists, skincare specialists and nail artists both in Scotland and Wales; I’ve judged in the WorldSkills competition, worked both New York and London fashion week as a nail Artist with the legend that is marian Newman. I became a published author at 9 years ago for industry qualification provider, City & Guilds before finding myself in Sales where I’ve remained for the last 6 years

My career sure has been a diverse one, and yet I still feel like I’m only just scratching the surface. I feel like I have so much more within me to give. How will I do it? I’ve no idea but I’m finally beginning to understand that it’s all about the journey and I’m truly relishing every moment of it

I began to lose my passion for the industry when I was in education and this was for a lot of different reasons both professional and personal, and whilst I look back on my time in education extremely fondly, I knew when it was my time to close that particular door and move on to pastures new. This was when I made the transition into sales, working initially for Sweet Squared and having one hell of a rollercoaster ride (Those days were fun – hard work and lots of fun!), before finding myself on the skincare and spa side, representing French powerhouse Thalgo and finally settling at the iconic British brand, ELEMIS where I am today

It’s been through education and sales that I’ve begun to develop and understand what my “why” really is. I am so deeply passionate about sharing my own knowledge, and not at all because I consider myself an expert, but more because I have a passion for learning myself and I am so desperate to share that with anyone who’ll listen and engage with me (hence the articles, podcasts and videos!). I’ve come to realise that my passion isn’t necessarily in travel and beauty anymore, even though both of those things are still important to me, its just that it’s become so much more than those two things alone:

  1. I am passionate about the Beauty and Wellness Industry because it’s given my life meaning. It’s given me a purpose. It’s given me endless opportunities in less than two decades
  2. I am passionate about selling because we, as therapists, are generally rubbish at selling to our clients. We fear it and then we become lazy. I’m on a mission to empower 1 million therapists worldwide to find comfort in the discomfort, and have a bit of fun when selling to their clients
  3. I am passionate about education. Knowledge is power as the saying goes and I am a big believer in that. Question everything you’ve ever been told and find a hunger for learning. Try to learn something new every day and you’ll never get bored

About five years ago I started feeling this need to write. I had no idea what I wanted to write but I could not shake the feeling one bit. It ate away at me until I attended SpaLife around 3 years ago and met Sharron Lowe, who is undoubtedly one of the most inspirational women I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. It was a couple of nights after this event and having finished reading her book that I was lying in bed when it hit me like a slap in the face; I wanted to write a book on the Wellness industry, particularly the Beauty Industry. I wanted to dispel the myths and perceptions surrounding us and our people; how we’re all not quite so academically minded, probably didn’t do well at school, definitely suck at maths, and just generally short of a few shillings as my dad would say. Something akin to those limiting beliefs I’m always harping on about in my business meetings

I snuck into the bathroom with a pen and paper and started frantically writing all my ideas down before I forgot them and the next day I set about typing it all up on my laptop. Needless to say that what started out as a pretty exciting endeavour quickly turned to despair when I realised that, although I had certainly achieved and seen a lot in my short time in this industry, it certainly wasn’t enough to write a book. I decided to change the format, asking friends and colleagues to contribute, and thank goodness everyone was on board

That was two years ago now and I still haven’t finished my book

I realised I need to gain as much knowledge as I could to share via my book by using other means. Enter the idea of creating my own podcast series, where I would interview an industry professional each month. I started in January 2019 and my first podcast was available by early February but, alas I hit another stumbling block; finding the time and a location (for little to no cost) in order to perform my interviews, and then having the time to edit. The same friend who introduced me to Simon Sinek is the very same person who helped me to realise that I was trying to do too much, too quickly and to take my time. Aim for one podcast each quarter whilst also building up a catalogue so that when the time came I could publish them on a monthly basis. Genius!

But it wasn’t enough and I felt like I needed something to keep me going in the meantime, whilst also feeling like a podcast alone still wasn’t enough. So, I decided to begin a daily podcast under the same name but this time it would be me alone giving up advice, discussing industry news and sharing anecdotes to do with all things Wellness. I’ve just finished recording my first episode, and I need to do another four, for this week alone! Hmmmmm, sense a pattern here?

I’m a big fan of Gary Vaynerchuck, or Gary Vee as he’s known to his devoted fans. He puts content out on a daily basis at the very least. He is prolific across pretty much every social media platform available and he is a big believer in “more is most definitely more”. So, I decided to take his advice and start a video series and set up my own website in which to publish my content on

So far I’ve recorded one video. I’m not the most confident on camera but it’s all about finding comfort in the discomfort right? I’ll get there

Why am I doing all of this? Well at first I thought it was because I wanted to help therapists improve their selling techniques but the reality is that I want to create stronger, and more meaningful links between education providers and industry; schools and colleges, colleges and universities, and all of the above with employers. I want parents and teachers to truly understand what it means to be a part of the fastest growing industry in the world, which (according to The Global Wellness Institute now boasts a $4.2 trillion dollar economy, making it over 3 times bigger than the pharmaceutical industry. That makes us all pretty damn epic in my eyes

More importantly I want us to start helping ourselves because for too long now I have listened to employers and so-called industry experts tell me that “therapists just aren’t what they used to be” and “colleges only care about bums on seats”. This type of rhetoric doesn’t help the situation or our industry at all. Plus I find it deeply offensive on so many levels as a Beauty Therapist, a Nail Artist, a former educator and someone who was part of the recruitment processes when managing Spa’s and Salons. We all got into this industry in the same way and so to have such an opinion means that you’re devaluing your own self, and what you bring to the table, more than anyone else

My “why”, my reason for doing what I do isn’t only because I love this industry that I am hugely proud to be a part of. I do what I do to empower every therapist and business owner I have the pleasure of meeting and spending time with. I do what I do because I want to make a change and I want to have a positive impact on professionals so that they, in turn, can have a positive impact on their clients. More than anything I want to change perceptions and I want people to encourage their learners, children and friends to pursue a career in Wellness if it is truly where their heart and passion lies

Ghandi is famous for telling us to “Be the change we wish to see in the world”, and I believe that it’s time for us to become the change we want to see in our industry

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