Expert dating advice from James Allen Hanrahan

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James Allen Hanrahan 

1. Tell us about your success journey as a dating expert.

To be honest, my success journey as a dating expert started when I met my wife. Until then, I was just dating. When I met her, she asked me a question no one had ever asked me before. “are you serious?” 

From that moment on I became serious about being married, and about learning everything I could about relationships. 

Shortly thereafter, I met my Mentor Dr. Pat Allen. A relationship expert for over 40 years and best-selling author of “Getting To I Do.” 

I was fortunate enough to spend over four years with her, training, asking her questions, and eventually writing two books with her. “A Life Of Love” and “Dating Advice for Alpha Women.”

2. What advice would you give to those who want to find true love in 2019?

Get in the game. I strongly encourage all my private clients to start dating someone. 

You learn when you’re in the game. At which point you can get feedback. This is how you learn about yourself and what it takes for you to be in a relationship.

I suggest you go to workshops, events, concerts, and classes etc. Places were you can meet like-minded people who have a similar interest. 

Do things you already enjoy. For example; I met my wife dancing salsa. But, I already liked dancing salsa. 

Do things you love to do that put a smile on your face, and love will have a chance to find you while you’re doing them!

3. Do you believe that there is only one true soulmate for everyone? If so, how do we attract our soulmate? 

I don’t believe that we have only one true soulmate. I think that everyone we date for any amount of time is a tremendous gift to us. They are our teachers. They’re teaching us one of two things, either what we want, or what we don’t want. Both are valuable.

I call the people that are not destined to be our soulmate, muscle builders. They are an important part of our journey towards meeting our soulmate. I also don’t believe that we meet our soulmate. I believe that people become our soulmate by walking with us.

It’s the people who want to work with us, and don’t expect us to be perfect, who want us to be our authentic self, who are willing to make and keep agreements with us, who want to establish a trustworthy record with us over time, that become our soulmate. And, isn’t that what we all want?


James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after dating and relationship coach for women based in Los Angeles. He is the author of two books, “A Life of Love” and “Dating Advice for Alpha Women.” He is also the creator of the widely acclaimed Chemistry to Commitment Relationship Workshop series, for women who want a quality man for lasting love.
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