“I can’t do it”.
“It will never work”.
“I’ll never be successful”.
“I’m not good enough”.
“WHY CAN”T THINGS BE EASIER?!”
Ever hear this unhelpful nonsense going on in your head?
Ever feel so lost in doubt, depression, fear, anxiety, stress, pain, procrastination or overwhelm that you literally CAN NOT take action?
Meet The Victim.
Before we evict it, let’s understand it.
The Victim: A third entity, separate from your Truest Self, sent to ‘protect you,’ courtesy of The Ego.
When we push to be more than we are; outside of our comfort zones, there will be resistance.
Growth does not occur within ‘the comfort zone’.
A certain amount of pain is required to grow.
“No pain no gain”. Right?
Right…
But our brain doesn’t like pain; growth and pain drains energy. The brain is designed to repeat the same tasks with as little energy output as possible. It is inherently lazy (but it’s potential also misunderstood).
That’s why knowing this, and having self-awareness, is critical to rapid growth.
Let’s shine the awareness torch on this once, and for all.
Let’s break it down, so you can stop breakin’ down (haha).
Let’s evict The Victim.
When you hear that voice, the negative chatter, maybe you’re about to go live on Facebook, get on a sales call with a prospective client. Maybe you’re about to bench 100 kg or ask that special someone out on a date.
Whatever it is, you are about to do something out of the ordinary. Something scary.
And you know what to do. But for some reason, you can’t!
WHY?!!!!
Those negative voices and feelings are not real. They are illusions designed by The Ego, to keep you safe and small.
From getting hurt.
The Ego doesn’t care if you don’t grow. It just wants you to avoid pain and death; it wants you to remain safe.
This primitive function does not even CARE that by staying comfortable you will eventually go backward and things will get WORSE.
Ego does NOT have the foresight or insight your True Self does.
When Ego realises you are about to do something ‘crazy’, it sends The Victim. The Fear. The Doubt. The Overwhelm. The Stress. The Anxiety. The Procrastinator. The Impostor.
All those wankers.
These entities are like henchman, they set up shop in your head, rent-free, and begin unloading their belongings: Negative emotions, false stories, unhelpful cycles, patterns, unhealthy habits and limiting beliefs.
The longer they stay (rent free), the harder it is to evict them. Like worms, they burrow themselves in until there is no escape.
This can literally be fatal, an imaginary thing that ruins our lives.
What can you do?
Be self-aware. Realise in those moments, what your brain is doing.
Fear, stress, anxiety, overwhelm; The Victim. They are all in fact symptoms of growth (not problems).
So breathe.
Acknowledge them.
Find gratitude for them. This is a great way to use them as super heroes rather than henchman.
Get your rent’s worth… Fuck rent free.
Now tell them you don’t need them. Evict the Impostor and all his mates.
“I see you trying to keep me small and safe, I don’t need you anymore, I’ve got this. Thank you. Goodbye. Tell the Ego thanks but no thanks.”
Now do it.
Just. Do. It!
If you don’t do the thing you have been avoiding, they will come back and with more firepower just to say ‘I told you so’.
And look, if they keep coming back, if you can’t break the cycle. Slow down. Stop. Breathe. Reassess.
Check your Intuitive Compass before you crash, or end up lost.
It can be one of two things;
1. What you are doing is not in alignment with your Vision, purpose, and mission (or you don’t have enough clarity on that – another conversation) either way you are off course and should check your engine/plan/strategy/destination.
2. What you are doing actually is in alignment with your Vision, purpose, and mission but it’s scary as fuck and Ego doesn’t want you RISKING getting hurt.
SO YOU MUST FIND A WAY TO DO IT.
It’s really that simple when you boil it down to the nuts and bolts.
Let Ego win, and you will stay (un)safe and small.
Do the things that scare you, and you will grow at a rapid rate.
Here’s the really cool part. Do it enough times and you’ll begin to see and feel a pattern forming. Make it beyond the pain, to healing and growth, something magical happens.
The brain goes “oh I did it, I didn’t need the ego” and it rewires the layers of neuroplasticity. It physically changes your brains makeup!
It says “That didn’t kill me, it hurt, but the feeling of pleasure outweighed the pain. Let’s find a way to do it again -using less energy!”
(Picture the Ego screaming as it is rewritten from existence “Nooooooooooo but you need me!”
So look, once you embody this knowledge as deeply as you know you need air, you basically become the master of your own reality.
You gain an unworldly sense of confidence, a ‘knowing’, deep wisdom, and cast iron courage.
The journey never ends, my friends.
The healing (and growth) are in the pain.
Run towards the fear, seek out the pain.
Find solace in this crazy, yet liberating concept.
You are in control.
Take off the Mask.
Claim YOUR superpower.
Evict The Victim.